- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Rimma
- Nominated by: Imperators II(Talk) 19:16, August 28, 2020 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: 100% Fitz Roi smashed the Three Great Works.
(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
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Support
- UberSoldat93
(talk) 15:17, August 29, 2020 (UTC) - Fan26 (Talk) 21:54, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 19:18, 23 October 2020 (UTC)- Tommy-Macaroni 10:11, 26 October 2020 (UTC)
MasterFred(talk) 22:17, 28 October 2020 (UTC)
Object
Toprawa
I don't think there's any value to stating this: "Rimma also shared its name with Rimma 13 and Rimma 18, two hyperspace exit points in the Eriadu system,[9] which also lay on the Rimma Trade Route." Considering that Rimma is in the Core and Eriadu is in the Outer Rim, there's no real logical connection here. It's more likely that these Eriadu Rimma exit points are named after the Rimma Trade Route, rather than the astronomical object, so this statement really belongs in that article instead.- Sure, makes sense. Removed. Imperators II(Talk) 08:09, October 22, 2020 (UTC)
What ruins on Rimma? The article just dives right into this reference with "the ruins on Rimma" like the reader is already familiar with this, but this concept has not yet been introduced in the article body. This needs some kind of brief introductory context: "several scrolls were discovered in the ruins on Rimma."- Good point, added. Imperators II(Talk) 08:19, October 22, 2020 (UTC)
Without reading this SAWJ issue myself, I'm guessing this news article about Fitz Roi on 35:1:22 is intending to be timely -- presumably, they're not writing a news article about something that happened five years ago, so we can be much more precise about this date placement. You should be able to say something like "Around the date 35:1:22..." instead of "Prior to..."- OK, changed. Imperators II(Talk) 08:19, October 22, 2020 (UTC)
This section intro is particularly strange, since this isn't happening four millennia after the events of Fitz Roi, who I'm to understand is a contemporary of the Galactic Civil War period. "During the Galactic Civil War, fought four millennia later..."- Must have been a relic of section reordering or something. Imperators II(Talk) 08:19, October 22, 2020 (UTC)
Who expected this? The news media? Can we clarify? "...and it was expected that Imperial stormtroopers would be ordered..."- Clarified. Imperators II(Talk) 08:19, October 22, 2020 (UTC)
Why not mention that HoloNet News covered the second riots, since the article mentions that TriNebulon News covered the first?Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 18:33, October 21, 2020 (UTC)- Actually, it now looks to me like the HoloNet News bit applies to other, pre- or post-Empire entries, since apparently HNN was not used by civilians during the reign of the Empire. I've generalized the quote caption accordingly. Not sure if that needs to be mentioned in the body now. Imperators II(Talk) 08:19, October 22, 2020 (UTC)
Tommy
You source Rimma being located in the Rimma system to TEA in the infobox but the online companion in the body. If this info can be sourced to TEA, the online companion reference can be removed from the body for simplicity (leaving "Rimma was a terrestrial astronomical object[4] located in the Rimma system, a part of the Southern Core portion of[2] the Core Worlds.[1]").- Sure. Imperators II(Talk) 06:23, 26 October 2020 (UTC)
Could you slightly rephrase the intro to avoid the repetition of "set of" in the first paragraph and "Rimma" in sentence three of paragraph two (although I appreciate this may be tricky as we don't know exactly what Rimma is).Tommy-Macaroni 20:43, 25 October 2020 (UTC)- Not at all, done. Imperators II(Talk) 06:23, 26 October 2020 (UTC)
Comments
Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 22:17, 28 October 2020 (UTC)