Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Memorial staff

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Memorial staff

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)

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Support

  1. ACvote Worked out the details and other objections on Discord. A great effort for your first GAN. Hope to see more from you. UberSoldat93 ClanMudhornSignet-Redemption (talk) 06:41, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
  2. Great work with the objections, ambitious first nom! LucaRoR (Talk) 17:21, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
  3. ACvote OOM 224 22:01, 15 August 2021 (UTC)
  4. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 23:33, 15 August 2021 (UTC)
  5. ACvote 1358 (Talk) 19:43, 19 August 2021 (UTC)

Object

LucaRoR
  • I think that in the "History" section, you could write, instead of: "When merit adoptive Mitth'ali'astovperformed her Trials in 19 BBY," -> "In 19 BBY, when merit adoptive Mitth'ali'astov performed her Trials,", because saying the date in the middle of a sentence might be confusing. It's just nit-picking, though. LucaRoR (Talk) 07:03, 3 August 2021 (UTC)
Braha'tok memorium
UberSoldat
  • Other information that the staff depicted should be included in the Description.
    • More details weren't provided in the novel, to my knowledge. I added some, but I haven't been able to find any more. -- YakovChaimTzvi ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol (talk) 19:35, 9 August 2021 (UTC)
      • I was referring to whatever was provided in the History, as taken from the novel. UberSoldat93 ClanMudhornSignet-Redemption (talk) 14:04, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
        • Do you mean I should move something from #History to #Description? If so, I couldn't think of anything. (Either way, I expanded the #Description section a little.) Please let me know. -- YakovChaimTzvi ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol (talk) 16:38, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
          • Thooraki tells Thalias to study certain things on the staff, right? That's a historical detail, and thus it goes into History. The things on the staff are part of the description of the subject, and should go into Description. I really can't explain this any further. UberSoldat93 ClanMudhornSignet-Redemption (talk) 17:32, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
            • Here is the quote: “You’d best continue to the top. Study the staffs as you climb. Note the pattern and flow of family history. Meditate on the lives and triumphs of the Mitth.” “And on their occasional failures?” The Patriarch nodded, the humor fading again. “Especially their failures,” he said quietly. “Note closely the gaps in the memorial record, the asymmetries where a syndic’s or Aristocra’s efforts have been cut off. Failure can be a harsh but capable teacher.” “But only when those who observe it learn from it.” I believe I've fully documented that between the History and Description sections. He didn't say that she should study any particular features like markings or inscriptions. -- YakovChaimTzvi ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol (talk) 18:03, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
              • Already spotted a missing detail: Asymmetries. UberSoldat93 ClanMudhornSignet-Redemption (talk) 18:13, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
                • Added that, both to "Description" and where relevant in "History". -- YakovChaimTzvi ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol (talk) 18:20, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
  • An image of Csilla can be included in the body. UberSoldat93 ClanMudhornSignet-Redemption (talk) 15:20, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • Can "near-human species" really not be sourced to Chaos Rising?
    • Indeed, it cannot. The word "human" in fact only occurs as part of the word "humanitarian." -- YakovChaimTzvi ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol (talk) 17:43, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
  • I'm going to have to object to using that image of Csilla. In the words of a former AgriCorps member who objected to this on one of my noms, "It's a boring picture of a dot on a map that doesn't add any extra contextual understanding or significance to the article." I think a picture of Thrawn would do much better.
  • Please fix the contraction, they are discouraged in formal writing.
    • I removed the one I found ("he'd wished to speak to her") -- YakovChaimTzvi ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol (talk) 17:43, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
  • The second history paragraph uses the word "told" six times. I think you can vary up that wording a bit. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 17:21, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
OOM
Ecks Dee
  • The way this is worded, it sounds like you're referring to a specific Chiss family rather than Chiss families in general. "Memorial staffs could be found at a Chiss family's homestead" You could rewrite this as "found at the homesteads of Chiss families" if the latter is the case. The same issue exists in the Description. 1358 (Talk) 17:15, 16 August 2021 (UTC)
    • It's intended to be Chiss families in general; however, the only homestead we've actually seen is the Mitth family homestead. Either way, I've made the change. -- YakovChaimTzvi ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol (talk) 17:22, 16 August 2021 (UTC)
    • I was not able to confirm that any families other than the Mitth used it, so I changed it to reflect that. How is it now? -- YakovChaimTzvi ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol (talk) 16:25, 17 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Just leaving this here for the record: per our Discord discussion, the source does not seem to indicate that memorial staffs were used by the Chiss in general and for all we know, they could be a Mitth family thing. Therefore, the article needs to be rewritten to reflect what we know: that the Mitth family used them. 1358 (Talk) 19:30, 18 August 2021 (UTC)
  • You definitely could include a sentence or even two on Thalias' adventure in the intro, which is quite short right now. 1358 (Talk) 17:33, 19 August 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 19:43, 19 August 2021 (UTC)