Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Balfus

The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Balfus

• Nominated by: LucaRoR ^(Talk) 06:42, 3 August 2021 (UTC)
• Nomination comments:
• WookieeProject (optional):

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)

(Votes required: No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

1. Minnabird ^(talk) 15:50, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
2. Dentface (talk) 21:52, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
3. 1358 ^(Talk) 21:06, 4 September 2021 (UTC)
4. I've added the release date for the second comic to the BTS. Ayrehead02 (talk) 12:23, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
5. OOM 224 17:43, 14 September 2021 (UTC)

Object

Braha

• Is there a quote in the comic that might attribute to the Wookiees in general that you could use in the bio?
• In similar fashion to the objection above, an image depicting the freeing of the Wookiees or something else that Balfus is technically involved in would also be beneficial for the bio.
  • The image you added takes place after everything that was mentioned in the bio, so I'm unsure how it attributes to Balfus. Is there not one of the Wookiees getting freed, since Balfus is apparently among those? Braha'tok enthusiast ^{Hello there} 11:55, 7 August 2021 (UTC)
    • I've had the same discussion with other editors, no, there isn't. This is why Balfus has only one "first mentioned" and nothing else, because he never officially appears nowhere. LucaRoR ^(Talk) 15:47, 7 August 2021 (UTC)
      • I should've been more specific. I don't mean of Balfus, but of events which are covered by the bio, which have some significance to Balfus's story in a way. The Wookiees celebrating after has nothing to do with that, so is obsolete. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{Hello there} 18:37, 7 August 2021 (UTC)
        • Trandoshan hunters attacking the village is better? LucaRoR ^(Talk) 07:04, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
          • Yeah that can work. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{Hello there} 12:18, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
• Can the release date actually be sourced to the comic? In my experience, none of the comics display their exact date of release. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{Hello there} 14:53, 6 August 2021 (UTC)
  • All done, is this what you were looking for? LucaRoR ^(Talk) 15:23, 6 August 2021 (UTC)
• Just read the Life Day comics, I think an article covering the events of the story would be beneficial.
  • An article covering the events of the story? There is one: the article about the comic. (Life Day (comic story))
    • Yes Life Day covers the events of Life Day, but what I meant was an in-universe article. Like how the in-universe Campaign in the Cerberon system differentiates from the out-of-universe Shadow Fall. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{Hello there} 12:18, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
      • Like this? Rescue of Qui-Gon Jinn. LucaRoR ^(Talk) 14:56, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
        • Yup, I've gone ahead and linked them for you. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{Hello there} 20:50, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
• Only part one of Life Day is in adventures 3, that should be clarified upon Life Day's mention. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{Hello there} 18:37, 7 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Nope, the other comic is called "Life Day Part 2", Life Day is only the first part. —Unsigned comment by LucaRoR (talk • contribs)
    • I see. I would still think it'd be beneficial to mention the fact it's part one of a story that spans two comic releases. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{Hello there} 12:18, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
      • Done. LucaRoR ^(Talk) 14:56, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
        • I've tinkered with it a little bit. Can you check this and verify that the sourcing is correct, please? Braha'tok enthusiast ^{Hello there} 20:50, 8 August 2021 (UTC)

UberSoldat

• Please cite the latest edition of Ultimate Star Wars if it contains the same information, per precedent.
• The first date note is completely redundant to the second, since both make it clear this story takes place before Phantom Menace.
• Context for Life Day.
• Can Kenobi being Jinn's Padawan not be sourced straight to the comic itself?
• Please take note of this copy-edit, in which I had to add links and fix Manual of Style violations, spelling and grammar errors. UberSoldat93 (talk) 15:33, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
  • All done. LucaRoR ^(Talk) 20:32, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Can the context for Life Day be supported by the comic itself? UberSoldat93 (talk) 07:29, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
      • Yes, I’ve checked LucaRoR ^(Talk) 07:54, 12 August 2021 (UTC)

Minnabird

• Since you're able to place the comic Balfus comes from between a range of dates using other reference points, is there any reason that the Clone Wars need to be mentioned and contextualized...?
• Verify you're okay with these copy-edits Minnabird ^(talk) 00:49, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Done and thanks for the copy-edit! LucaRoR ^(Talk) 20:32, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
• I know the sentence about Balfus being captured was giving you some trouble with re-wording since you moved the date range earlier in the paragraph. Rearranging it to eliminate the passive voice might actually get it more concise for you? For example: "In the lead-up to Life Day, an important Wookiee festivity, Trandoshan hunters took advantage of the Wookiees' weakness during the holiday (during the preparations? why were they weak?) to capture Balfus."Minnabird ^(talk) 15:50, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Done, thanks. The source just says that they were weak during Life Day, it doesn’t say why… LucaRoR ^(Talk) 15:47, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
    • I figured that was probably the case! Minnabird ^(talk) 15:50, 12 August 2021 (UTC)

Ecks Dee

• Seeing as we know approximately how many years before the Clone Wars Balfus lived, you could be more specific than "some years" in the intro.
  • 44 BBY is more than a decade (in fact, it's more than two decades) before 22 BBY, so we can't say for sure that he lived a decade before the Clone Wars. 1358 ^(Talk) 19:54, 31 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Dammit, my bad. I think in this case the full date fits just right. Is this good? LucaRoR ^(Talk) 20:06, 31 August 2021 (UTC)
• You should reformat the Bts mentions to not include years in parentheses. 1358 ^(Talk) 19:36, 31 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Both done, thanks! LucaRoR ^(Talk) 19:50, 31 August 2021 (UTC)
• So is Life Day one specific day or an extended holiday? In the intro, you say he was captured during Life Day whereas in the bio you say it occurred during the lead-up to Life Day.
  • Clarified in the intro. LucaRoR ^(Talk) 12:26, 1 September 2021 (UTC)
• What is the Wookiee weakness you describe here? Does the source specify? "Trandoshan hunters took advantage of the Wookiees' weakness during the holiday to capture Balfus." 1358 ^(Talk) 11:59, 1 September 2021 (UTC)
  • The comic does't specify it. It just says that the Wookiees were weak during Life Day. LucaRoR ^(Talk) 12:26, 1 September 2021 (UTC)
• Balfus, the subject of the article, is not mentioned by name in the second Bio paragraph at all. Please reword to focus more on the article subject. 1358 ^(Talk) 20:21, 1 September 2021 (UTC)
  • Balfus is not mentioned in the second part of the comic. I have already had a discussion with other editors, and we decided that it is better to write the second paragraph without mentioning Balfus, but referring to Wookiees in general, since it is fair to assume that Balfus was part of those Wookiees, yet it is not certain. LucaRoR ^(Talk) 05:41, 2 September 2021 (UTC)

OOM

• One last thing: the article could use a category for gender. OOM 224 17:11, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
  • Added, thanks. LucaRoR ^(Talk) 17:40, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
    • You're welcome OOM 224 17:43, 14 September 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 17:43, 14 September 2021 (UTC)