Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/1933

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

1933

  • Nominated by: Erebus Chronus (Talk) 21:22, 22 March 2022 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Not WP:CIS unfortunately, but still pretty good :P
  • WookieeProject (optional):

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)

(Votes required: No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. DFaceG (talk) 09:06, 27 May 2022 (UTC)
  2. ACvote Ayrehead02 (talk) 14:28, 27 May 2022 (UTC)
  3. Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 09:01, 31 May 2022 (UTC)
  4. ACvote 1358 (Talk) 19:57, 6 June 2022 (UTC)
  5. ACvote Imperators II(Talk) 20:34, 18 June 2022 (UTC)

Object

Dani
  • The second paragraph under Capturing Theed reads that 1933 was present for the events of the capturing and that isn't depicted in the movie, as far as I know. NBDani (talk) 18:17, 24 March 2022 (UTC)
    • What do you mean? He was deployed along with the rest of the droid army. Doesn't have to be depicted since 2163 says that he was part of the invasion force.
  • "the battle droid was destroyed by Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn after they entered the hangar, which allowed them to board the starship and escape the planet with Queen Padmé Amidala and her entourage." This should be reworded as it appears the droid enetered the hangar. NBDani (talk) 18:17, 24 March 2022 (UTC)
Fan
  • "which allowed them to board the starship and escape the planet" It should clarify who 'them' is. So far in this particular sentence only the droid and Qui-Gon have been mentioned (one destroyed, the other male), and Padme and the handimaidens haven't been introduced until the next clause. This should be reworded. Fan26 (Talk) 17:09, 25 April 2022 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • It's a little unclear who "he" is here - Jinn or the droid, I'm assuming - "where he was shortly ordered to halt by 2163". JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 20:50, 11 May 2022 (UTC)
Ecks
  • Is it really relevant to this particular droid that Sidious was behind the invasion plan? Seems like mentioning Gunray would suffice.
  • "As a result, the Federation was able to capture the planet's capital of Theed, leading to its subsequent occupation and capture of its citizens." Two instances of the "capture" here, maybe reword one of them.
  • "After entering the hangar, Jinn steadily approached[4] 1933 and the other droids,[2] causing a brief moment of uncertainty between the droids as the Jedi assumed their positions,[4] where Jinn was shortly ordered to halt by 2163." The last clause here doesn't really connect well to the rest of the sentence; where exactly is Jinn ordered to halt? Maybe the clause could be moved to the next sentence where you talk about Jinn being halted, as well.
  • "However, before the droids could follow their orders and raise their blasters, Jinn activated his lightsaber and destroyed 2163, resulting in 1933's death in the Jedi's swing." If I'm understanding this correctly, 1933 and 2163 were killed in the same swing, right? If so, you could simply say "destroyed 2163 and 1933 in his swing", thus removing that last, somewhat choppy clause. 1358 (Talk) 17:42, 20 May 2022 (UTC)
  • One more: you basically say twice that droids were deployed to the surface, in consecutive sentences. Can we reword to remove this redundancy? 1358 (Talk) 20:34, 27 May 2022 (UTC)
    • Shouldn't really have mattered, since I was using it to help write that subsequent sentence. But it's been fixed a few days ago. Erebus Chronus (Talk) 15:22, 31 May 2022 (UTC)
      • I don't think the current wording really works. The Trade Federation was able to claim control during the ongoing invasion/deployment, not afterward. 1358 (Talk) 07:35, 1 June 2022 (UTC)
        • How's that? Erebus Chronus (Talk) 15:16, 1 June 2022 (UTC)
          • Reworded slightly to get rid off the slightly-awkward hanging sentence. 1358 (Talk) 19:57, 6 June 2022 (UTC)
Ayrehead
  • Your current wording says that 1933 was used in the invasion after the droid army landed on the planet, but I'd say the landing was part of the invasion as well so could you reword it to reflect this? Ayrehead02 (talk) 07:29, 21 May 2022 (UTC)
    • This should be fixed.
  • The article suggests that the droids were stationed to guard the starship before the pilots were captured and sent to the hangar, which I don't think you can source to the film and I don't remember seeing in any other source. Ayrehead02 (talk) 07:29, 21 May 2022 (UTC)
    • Changed some wording in both paragraphs there.
      • Still reads a bit odd to me, I'd change the start of the second paragraph to something like "The droids under 2163's command also guarded several members..." or something similar. We want to say they were guarding both things without implying one came after the other. Ayrehead02 (talk) 08:23, 22 May 2022 (UTC)
  • Since you use it as the subsection heading you should mention that 1933 was beheaded in the body as well. Ayrehead02 (talk) 07:29, 21 May 2022 (UTC)
    • Is that right?
  • Precedent is apparently to source the name of Trade Federation Script to the film itself as we do for aurebesh. Ayrehead02 (talk) 07:29, 21 May 2022 (UTC)
Imp
  • Please rework the lead quote caption, since the quote doesn't really contain any orders to 2163's subordinates. Imperators II(Talk) 06:30, 7 June 2022 (UTC)
    • Does that work? Erebus Chronus (Talk) 16:14, 7 June 2022 (UTC)
      • Well, now the quote has no immediately apparent connection to 1933 whatsoever. Either you try and work in the connection in the caption or just use the "Behead by a Jedi" quote instead. Imperators II(Talk) 16:35, 7 June 2022 (UTC)
        • That's actually a better place for the quote. Both have been switched around, with additional context in the arrest caption. Erebus Chronus (Talk) 16:41, 7 June 2022 (UTC)
  • The referencing in the first sentence of "Beheaded by a Jedi" implies that 1933 was mentioned in that DeAgostini Encyclopedia issue. Please revise whichever way is appropriate. Imperators II(Talk) 21:14, 15 June 2022 (UTC)
  • Please link the capture of Theed in the body.
  • If "death" is indeed applicable to droids, it should be pipelinked in the body, as well.
    • Both linked.
  • "The droids stationed in the hangar also guarded several members of the Royal Naboo Security Forces, including pilots from the Space Fighter Corps, and were placed in a group on the ground, surrounded by B1 battle droids." — right now, the sentence says the droids were placed on the ground and were surrounded by B1 battle droids.
    • Fixed.
  • "While the Federation held the pilots in custody, 1933 stood alongside 2163 and three other B1 units, including 7169, by the boarding ramp to the starship." — this is the first time you mention any starship in the body. I'm assuming that's the Naboo Royal Starship, which you only mention in the intro, so that should be worked into the body as well. Imperators II(Talk) 10:45, 18 June 2022 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 20:34, 18 June 2022 (UTC)