Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Mirta Gev

< Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Mirta Gev

(5 Inqs/ 2 Users/7 Total/INQCON 5)

Support

  1. Inqvote You'll need full bacta submersion after this duel.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 22:18, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote Thefourdotelipsis 03:33, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
  3. Inqvote Chack Jadson (Talk) 12:07, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote Green Tentacle (Talk) 22:07, 1 May 2009 (UTC)
  5. -- —Harrar (Villip) 11:02, 1 June 2009 (UTC)
  6. Nice. -Clonehunter 21:52, 7 June 2009 (UTC) [Redacted by administration]
  7. Inqvote The Lord Hydronium SEAL OF APPROVAL. - Lord Hydronium 06:07, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

Object

  1. I think you should expand the "Second Battle of Fondor" section. At the moment, it has no mention of her fight with Tahiri Veila during it, or that Jacen Solo Force choked her, so that Tahiri could escape --Jinzler 21:35, 18 February 2009 (UTC)
  2. DC
    • I think you should state the actual year of Sinta's carbonation instead of how long ago it was.
      • Addressed.
    • Why didn't Marec and Vel's relationship last?
    • The entire Early Life section is very choppy and doesn't flow well at all.
    • "Gev got into her mother and grandfather's business as a bounty hunter, at one point encountering former clone trooper Skirata during an ill-fated mission." You're beginning to go somewhere in this sentence, but it needs more detail, mostly about her encounter with Skirata. Expand upon this sentence.
      • Addressed.
    • The beginning of Finding Fett is very choppy as well.
    • You don't mention a thing about Gev wanting revenge while she traveled with fett, nor her attack on him. This is in Bloodlines by the way.
      • Addressed.
        • Could still use some work. It is understood that she probably wanted revenge because her mother wanted revenge, but you need to explicitly state that. You also mention her attacking Fett, but you do not say why; you just say she did it. Expand on that as well.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 16:52, 28 March 2009 (UTC)
          • Addressed.
    • Why was stopping Fett's aging important?
      • Addressed.
    • "But first, the pair traveled to Geonosis, to return the body of Fett's father, Jango Fett, to Mandalore to be buried."
    • Can't start a sentence with But.
      • Addressed.
    • Context for the Yuuzhan Vong War, and how it affected Mandalore.
      • Addressed.
    • "The hostility from the bartender led to an all out brawl, with the Mandalorians winning easily." Easily is POV, unless Fett or Gev said it was easy.
      • Addressed.
    • "After the fight, the bartender told Gev and Fett that Cherit's successor, Fraig, took over Cherit's position, and that Fraig could be found at the Tekshar Falls Casino." Redundant, delete and rewrite.
      • Addressed.
    • Expand upon their confrontation with Skirata.
      • Addressed.
    • Mention that Venku was Kad'ika.
      • Addressed.
    • Did Mirta really call Orade her boyfriend?
      • Addressed.
    • Expand upon what Mirta did during Sinta's treatment, and how Solo came to them during this time.
      • Addressed.
        • It could stand a tad more. Didn't Mirta give Sintas the Heart of Fire around that time?—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 04:00, 27 March 2009 (UTC)
          • Addressed.
            • "In a meeting with Venku Skirata and his friend Gotab in a Keldabe tapcafe, Gotab revealed the location of Sintas Vel by using Kiffar abilities to read Vel's heart-of-fire stone." First of all, this is the Heart's first mention; you need to explain here what it is, and its significance. Secondly, you show it here as "heart-of-fire". Later, you show it as "Heart of Fire"…which is it?—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
              • Addressed.
    • Per Jinzler on the expansion needed for the Second Battle of Fondor.
      • Addressed.
    • "This time it was a battle to protect the Verpine, an insectoid race who built the Tra'kads from the Imperial Remnant." I'm pretty sure that the Verpine allied with the Mandalorians for other reasons. Expand upon that.
      • Addressed.
        • Not really. The Mandalorians didn't control the Verpine, they were business partners.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 04:00, 27 March 2009 (UTC)
          • Addressed.
    • Also, mention that the Mandolorians and the Jedi could not afford to lose the Verpine to Caedus and the Imperial Remnant, and the reason why they had to defend them.
      • Addressed.
        • Not yet. This will be probably be addressed when you fix the one above.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 16:52, 28 March 2009 (UTC)
          • Yup, addressed.
    • Expand upon what exactly happened at Roche; like what Mirta and Solo did, and how the battle went.
      • Addressed.
    • Mention Fett's reaction to Mirta's capture, and what this meant.
      • Addressed.
    • Expand upon what happened when Mirta was resuced from the Anakin Solo by Solo, and how the war ended.
      • Addressed.
    • "but her subsequent whereabouts are unknown, due to the nanovirus preventing her return to Mandalore." Delete, we don't use unknown results.
      • Addressed.
    • "But once Gev finally met Fett, she was initially hostile, but eventually became friends with her grandfather." Not only do you use but twice in a setnence, but you start if off with it. Rewrite.
      • Addressed.
    • Why did Gev become firends with Fett?
      • Addressed.
    • You mention nothing about her friendship with Solo, nor her hatred of Jedi in the P&T.
      • Addressed.
    • You also mention nothing about her lust for revenge against Solo for killing her mother in the P&T, or the Bio.
    • P&T needs an expansion in general.
      • Addressed.
    • You don't use any info from the CSWE, besides when you mention the picture in the BtS.
    • You might be missing some things in the Sources section, make sure that Mirta isn't/is mentioned in any sourcebooks or Star Wars Insider issues.
    • This is missing a lot of info, and has a lot of short, confusing, choppy sentences. Make sure you contextify everything, watch your linking, and try to avoid colloquial language. DC 02:24, 19 February 2009 (UTC)
  3. Tommy:
    • "After the skirmish, Boba Fett, who thought that his granddaughter had been killed, became enraged at Jaina Solo and Jedi Master Luke Skywalker, blaming them for Gev's death, meaning that the aloof Fett truly did care for his granddaughter." This needs to be broken up and slightly reworded.
      • Addressed.
    • "Gev attacked Solo viciously both times they encountered each other in the battles of Roche[1] and Fondor," How did she go from being Solo's friend to attacking her viciously?
      • Addressed.
    • Wasn't Mirta a special type of Mandalorian warrior?
      • No, I don't believe so.
    • You need to state sooner in the intro Mirta's homeworld.
      • Addressed.
    • Now do the same for the bio.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
      • Addressed.
    • More coming.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 05:16, 27 March 2009 (UTC)
    • You don't mention the Heart of Fire anywhere, actually.
      • Addressed.
        • See the reference to the Heart of Fire in the midst of DC's objections, and this one will be resolved through that.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
          • Addressed.
    • The second and third sentences in the "Search for Skirata" section start with "The two".
    • "When Gev tried to attack Caedus, she was slammed on her head by the Sith Lord, dealing her a severe injury." Expand on the extent of the injury, as it was expanded on in Invincible.
      • Addressed.
    • Also, you've been through the ringer enough to know by now how to spot over/underlinking. I've cleaned up some of it, but you really need to go through and make sure that the rest is done.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
      • Addressed.
    • Also, where I you, I'd stick an image of Ghes somewhere, maybe in the P&T.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
      • Addressed.
  4. Four Dot:
    • There should probably be some elaboration as to what Fett does on Vohai.
    • This is more a personal preference, but I think it would work better if you didn't keep refering to Orade as Gev's future husband, and let things pan out naturally.
    • There's a bit of repetition here and there, particularly in the last two sections of the bio. It feels a bit piecemeal, so I'd suggest a bit of a look through to make sure you're not saying the same things twice.
    • "Specifically, Caedus wanted to know who cut off his arm in the battle." - You might need to tell us about this dismembering a bit earlier. :P
    • The image of Gev and Orade's marriage would be really good in that Second Battle of Fondor, since it is the only image of any of the events depicted. You can probably bung the Jaina image in the P&T then.
    • Otherwise, very readable. I've made some of my own changes, here and there, but let me know if there are any that undermine anything you had intended originally. Good work overall. Thefourdotelipsis 00:16, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
  5. From the Chron-O-John of Green Tentacle:
    • Finding Fett: "…where he was staying for a meeting with his second-in-command, Goran Beviin." Mention why he has a second-in-command. Until now he's only been described as a bounty hunter.
      • Addressed.
    • Finding Fett: "…Corellian Chief of State Thrackan Sal-Solo…" Should it not be Head of State? Also, his job title should be linked to something.
      • Addressed.
    • Finding Fett: "…with Fett and Gev accompanied by ex-smuggler Han Solo…" Could use a quick mention of Han's link to Thrackan and why he wants to help.
      • Addressed.
    • Second Battle of Folor: "…Imperial Remnant leader Gilad Pellaeon had been murdered…" By who? Becomes clear later, but it would be better to say here. Green Tentacle (Talk) 18:24, 29 April 2009 (UTC)
  6. Stuff:
    • Needs to be elaborated how Ailyn gave Gev the heart of fire to ensnare Fett, and how it did so; that was the reason Fett let her stay, since he figured he could find Ailyn on his own.
      • Addressed.
    • "Gev was once again forced to remain in the ship, despite her attempts at coercion." - That reads kind of vaguely.
      • Addressed.
    • The sequence of events on Corellia isn't really complete or accurate. They first meet with Sal-Solo, where he wants to hire them to defend Centerpoint's repair teams, then Gejjen pulls them aside and makes them his counteroffer. The section of Sal-Solo's death is extremely brief, too, for something that takes up a couple chapters of the book. Should be elaborated on how Han was brought into it, and how Han recognized Gev as an accomplice of Ailyn, who was after him. Related to that, mention should be made earlier of how she unsuccessfully tried contacting Ailyn, and the GA got her name.
      • Addressed.
    • The mention of Vong War devastation should probably be pushed back to its proper place in the timeline (give or take, since you don't know exactly when, but she's probably older than ten). The article's already provided the proper context for Mandalore to show why that would affect her. - Lord Hydronium 02:38, 2 May 2009 (UTC)
      • Addressed.
    • I can't believe I'm saying this, but more context on the Battle of Fondor would not be out of line. It's a very sudden start, and I think the reasons for the Mandalorians coming to Fondor could at least be expanded on.
      • Addressed.
    • "Fett lambasted them for Gev's death, meaning that the aloof Fett truly did care for his granddaughter." - I'd rather this were phrased less didactically, than just the blatant "THIS IS WHAT THIS EVENT MEANS". Maybe say he revealed that he cared in that way, or he showed that he cared to [some person].
      • Reworded.
    • "Gev, still lying wounded" - sounds like she was lying down the entire time.
      • Addressed.
    • Caedus not knowing that it was Jaina cut off his arm could be explained better. Explain the illusion back when it happens, because otherwise you get to the second part and suddenly he doesn't know who cut off his own arm. And the explanation given is rather fuzzy, since there's no reason said why he would think both Jaina and Luke were there. - Lord Hydronium 03:36, 2 May 2009 (UTC)
    • Addressed. Thanks for the review. IFYLOFD (You will pay the price for your lack of vision!) 21:22, 17 May 2009 (UTC)
  7. From the howling Intergalactic Void of Harrar
    • Is there no further information on when and how Mirta met Skirata the first time?
      • Nah. She basically said that she met him on a bounty hunting mission, nothing else really.
    • Using the pendant to "ensnare" Fett makes it sound like she's going to tie him up with it - please address
      • Reworded.
    • Mirta attacks Fett the first time they meet?! I could have sworn she just followed him until he turns around and confronts her. Looking at Tommy's earlier objection - "You don't mention a thing about Gev wanting revenge while she traveled with fett, nor her attack on him. This is in Bloodlines by the way" - it looks like you've placed it in the wrong area. Check that please.
    • "Coerce" is too strong a word - manipulating, perhaps?
      • Reworded.
    • "Tag along" is too informal, please reword
      • Reworded.
    • "Gev pointed them to Coruscant" - hmm, doesn't sound right. Please reword
      • Reworded.
    • Missing info on how Gev tries to contact her mother via conflict and can't get through
      • Addressed.
    • This is going to sound rude but the fact that the information about Gev pulling a blaster on Fett in the safehouse after the assassination is missing is quite an oversight. There's a ton of information there that's crucial to the article, such as her confrontation of and reconciliation with Fett. I'd re-read Bloodlines completely and check your info is correct and that your level of detail is consistent. Frankly, it seems like this section has been written from memory.
      • Sorry about that. Addressed.
    • "Afterwards, the two attended a meeting of the Mandalorian clans" - need to clarify who "the two" are
      • Addressed.
    • As I recall, Gev doesn't "con" the Hamdryas bodyguard — she threatens to cut his caratoid artery. I think you're thinking of the receptionist of the casino; Fett is introduced as the President of Mandalore as due to their standards of decorum for visiting dignitaries they are obliged to let him in. You need to look over this and check your facts.
      • Addressed.
    • "Faced with death, Fraig divulged that Skirata had a grudge against a Twi'lek clan named Himar." - What's the relevance here?
      • Addressed.
    • If I remember correctly (again!) they are attacked en route to the Slave I while being pursued by a series of patrol vehicles. Try and expand this section please.
      • Addressed.
    • You make it sound like Vevut's offer of a blaster is what encourages Gev to marry Orade - either remove or give more details on how they fall in love (don't they go for walks or something)
      • Addressed.
    • Can we expand upon how Fett and Gev behave on their journey to Phaeda - how does Fett feel about his wife being alive/Gev feel about her grandmother?
      • Addressed.
    • I'm going to wait on Hydro's objection about the Battle of Fondor before striking this one as I want to see how things look
      • Addressed.
    • Rather than jumping straight to the Battle of Roche, please talk about how stuff ends with Sintas/how the war progresses - basically try to make the transition smoother so we can ditch the "this time it was a battle" phrase
      • Addressed.
    • I think you need to re-read the interrogation scene in Invincible as well as Jaina's interactions with Gev when she comes to rescue her. As I recall, Jacen does semi-crack Mirta by convincing her that Fett has abandoned her and landed her in the situation — she becomes quite apathetic and frightened. When Jaina arrives, I'm sure I remember her being disconcerted with Mirta's state of mind and confused as to what Jacen's done to her. Finally, are you sure Mirta frees herself or is she just given the blaster? When Jag arrives after Jaina kills Jacen, I swear she sends him off to find Gev and get her to safety.
      • Addressed.
    • Reading your P&T, which I really liked, you seem to have included some of the pertinent info for the last section of the bio in there when it really should be present in both. The fact that Mirta would prefer to put herself out of her misery is relevant to both bio and P&T
      • Addressed.
    • Okay so. Basically this review will come across as harsh anyway, so I'm going to go ahead and say that I'm not sure quite what's going on with this article and I find the lack of pertinent info/inclusion of erroneous info both disconcerting and, well, alarming. Clearly you have access to the novels and this is shown by the detailed nature of some sections, such as the early life part, in which you've drawn info from all three Traviss books to provide a decent overview of Gev's childhood. How you can go from this to the muddled Gejjen assassination and discarded Fett confrontation is therefore a little odd. At times it seems like you've written some parts with the book right in front of you, and at others from what you can recall. If you think I've been unfair then please show me where my objections have been unwarranted; for the time being, I'd urge you to re-read and re-evaluate the sections I've raised questions about and consider whether this article is really accurate and worthy of going on the front page. On the other hand, well done for taking a character and expanding and nominating her; she's a lot better than what she was. -- —Harrar (Villip) 13:34, 7 May 2009 (UTC)

Comments

  • I volunteer to take over DC's objections in light of his departure. In take over, I mean to merely verify that the objections have been addressed in accordance with the objection. An Inquisitor's review will be given as well, and, of course, only one vote will be cast. Please advise on the next course of action.—Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG (Nine two eight one) 05:29, 28 February 2009 (UTC)

Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 06:13, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

  1. ↑ Invincible