Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Cadomai Prime/Legends

< Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Contents

  • 1 Cadomai Prime
    • 1.1 (3 Inqs/4 Users/7 Total)
      • 1.1.1 Support
      • 1.1.2 Object
        • 1.1.2.1 501st
        • 1.1.2.2 Hk47
        • 1.1.2.3 Cadeth
        • 1.1.2.4 Attack of the Clone
        • 1.1.2.5 Cav
        • 1.1.2.6 Savaged…
      • 1.1.3 Comments

Cadomai Prime

  • Nominated by: IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 01:11, May 20, 2013 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Alone in the clouds all blue, lying on an eiderdown. Yippee! You can't see me but I can you.

(3 Inqs/4 Users/7 Total)

Support

  1. Must have forgotten to support. 501st dogma(talk) 16:42, July 14, 2013 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote Cade GalacticRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit Calrayn 03:01, September 2, 2013 (UTC)
  3. Inqvote CC7567 (talk) 01:19, September 19, 2013 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote Sir Cavalier of OneFarStar(Squadron channel) 21:04, September 23, 2013 (UTC)
  5. Thefourdotelipsis (talk) 03:17, September 30, 2013 (UTC)
  6. Exiled Jedi Oldrepublic crest (Greetings) 01:53, October 2, 2013 (UTC)
  7. ~SavageBOB sig 13:05, October 15, 2013 (UTC)

Object

501st
  • Should the Blood Code be given an article?
    • It's really something that should go in the Biology and appearance section of the Snivvian article, not have its own article.
  • Otherwise, nice work. 501st dogma(talk) 11:43, June 1, 2013 (UTC)
    • Thanks for the review. IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 16:22, June 1, 2013 (UTC)
Hk47
  • Missing content from Star Wars Adventure Journal 11, see this. Hk 47 (talk) 22:06, June 12, 2013 (UTC)
    • I intentionally left that out, because I'm not sure how much it pertains to the planet itself. The event didn't occur on the planet, or in orbit or anything like that. IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 23:45, June 12, 2013 (UTC)
      • You can add a short sentence anyway. Hk 47 (talk) 22:40, July 31, 2013 (UTC)
        • Like I said, I don't think it really pertains. That's why I left it out. IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 03:33, August 10, 2013 (UTC)
          • I just read it once again and it seem the event took place on the planet or above ("final approach to Cadomai"). So it looks relevant to me. Hk 47 (talk) 12:30, August 14, 2013 (UTC)
            • Yeah alright, done. IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 02:35, August 19, 2013 (UTC)
              • It seems good for me. Hk 47 (talk) 16:56, August 24, 2013 (UTC)
Cadeth
  • I'm not sure sustainable is the right word in the intro; maybe "suitable" instead?
  • I think an "also known simply as Cadomai" might be warranted in the intro, as you refer to it as Cadomai frequently, and Gryph calls it that in the quote.
  • Should the Chevram not be included in the infobox?
  • That's it. Cade GalacticRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit Calrayn 19:00, August 26, 2013 (UTC)
Attack of the Clone
  • Anything that can be done about that {{Image}} maintenance tag?
    • Cade fixed that.
  • In the Description section, I think it would be worth clarifying that "Cadomai" is an alternate name, as the intro does.
    • Done.
  • Does the TEAOC specifically mention Cadomai Prime (the planet) or just the Cadomai system? I was under the impression that it only mentions system names. If that's the case, the TEAOC should be removed from the Sources list. CC7567 (talk) 15:49, September 12, 2013 (UTC)
    • Good point. Removed. IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 21:12, September 14, 2013 (UTC)
  • "The planet Cadomai Prime was first mentioned in the Imperial Sourcebook": would it be better to state here that the planet is simply named Cadomai, e.g. "The planet Cadomai was…"? The reason I'm asking is because later in the Bts, it is stated that the name "Cadomai Prime" isn't introduced until Alien Anthology, so changing that first sentence would be more consistent with all source material and the overall flow of the Bts.
    • Good point. Changed.
  • Is there a reason that the planet is listed in the Category:Sith-aligned planets|Sith-aligned planets category? The article does state that it fell within space controlled by Revan's and Krayt's Sith Empires, but if those are going to be considered official affiliations (as the use of the Sith-aligned planets category implies), then the infobox should also list these Sith Empires as affiliations, I would think. Please clarify. CC7567 (talk) 00:20, September 15, 2013 (UTC)
    • Yeah, I guess you're right. I've never really thought those should count as official affiliations. IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 23:24, September 17, 2013 (UTC)
Cav
  • Seeing as Cadomai's first actual appearance is in the latest Legacy, it should get a mention in the BTS as such. - Sir Cavalier of OneFarStar(Squadron channel) 18:01, September 22, 2013 (UTC)
    • Right. Mentioned. IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 02:36, September 23, 2013 (UTC)
Savaged…
  • Are tundra and plains separate terrains on Cadomai, or are they synonymous? In some places, the article treats them as identical (as in the intro and "Description," "tundra plains"), but in others, it treats them as separate (like the infobox).
    • The source material calls them "tundra plains". Fixed in the infobox.
  • The first paragraph of "History" jumps around a lot in chronology. I'd recommend reordering some of the sentences, particularly toward the end of the paragraph. As it stands now, we're told that three dictators have ruled, how they were toppled, and then that the Snivvians mastered genetics to stop such events. But only then do we hear that Cadomai's history was violent due to these genetic anomalies and that the Blood Code has brought down civilizations on the world. In short, maybe move the violence and the civilization-toppling to be mentioned first, then discuss the specific dictators.
    • Done.
  • I think the mention you have of government in "History" is fine, but I think it'd be good to mention the government again in "Inhabitants," since it's how those inhabitants are ruled. I've admittedly only written a few planet articles, but the distinction I try to draw is to mention that a particular kind of government was developed in "History," then give the details of how it functioned in "Inhabitants."
    • Mentioned.
  • In describing the Snivvian–Gran shenanigans in the last paragraph of "History," we only learn that there's a traitor in the Snivvians' midst when the Snivvians do. However, from an omniscient, encyclopedic POV, we should know that there's a traitor from the get go.
    • I think the article already tells you that there's a traitor from the beginning. "A committee of three Snivvian politicians subsequently entered negotiations with a team of Gran representatives to this end; unbeknownst to the others, one of the Snivvian envoys was a secret Sith operative..."
  • Do we have any idea when their population was 99%/1% Snivvian/other? It looks like that's being sourced to the Knights of the Old Republic Campaign Guide, which would allow us to at least say "sometime between the years of X BBY and X BBY" or "during the [blah blah blah] War" that takes place during that comic.
    • Fixed.
  • "Inhabitants" is currently out of historical order; we hear of ancient history, then the GCW, then the Clone Wars. Can you reorder these notable residents chronologically?
    • Done.
  • I think the "Inhabitants" section should probably include a paragraph about the Snivvians as a species. Nothing as detailed as even the lead of a hypothetical FA-level Snivvian article, but something that gives the basics of their appearance and society. You cover much of this elsewhere, but it bears repeating here, I think.
    • Put something in there.
  • Can we get names of authors and BTS? Also, the artists who drew the planet for the first time would be good, too.
    • I really don't want to come at the reader with like 1,500 names—plus, many of the ones mentioned have multiple writers. Mentioned the artist, though.
      • This shouldn't be that bad -- We especially need to know that Pablo Hidalgo wrote the entry on GG12, and it wouldn't hurt to name John Jackson Miller as the author of KOTOR. I'm with you on the others, though. ~SavageBOB sig 02:58, October 15, 2013 (UTC)
        • OK. Added a few. IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 03:35, October 15, 2013 (UTC)
  • You can probably lift some quotes from Galaxy Guide 12, since it's an in-universe source written by Tem Eliss. ~SavageBOB sig 12:41, October 8, 2013 (UTC)
    • There's really nothing good.
  • The images make it seem that mountains and canyons should be mentioned as terrains. ~SavageBOB sig 12:51, October 8, 2013 (UTC)
    • Mentioned. IFYLOFD (Enter the Floydome) 00:32, October 15, 2013 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 14:55, October 15, 2013 (UTC)