Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Burra

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Burra

  • Nominated by: —MJ— Training Room 19:16, March 23, 2013 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: GA over 1,000 words, originally written by Jonjedigrandmaster. Took more cleanup than I thought would be needed to get it ready, as there were some factual errors and missing information. First nom for WP:NOVELS, also falls under WP:LE.

(5 Inqs/1 Users/6 Total)

Support

  1. Inqvote IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 23:30, March 24, 2013 (UTC)
  2. 501st dogma(talk) 22:43, April 7, 2013 (UTC)
  3. Inqvote Sir Cavalier of OneFarStar(Squadron channel) 09:38, April 11, 2013 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote CC7567 (talk) 23:59, May 19, 2013 (UTC)
  5. Inqvote Cade GalacticRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit Calrayn 23:58, May 23, 2013 (UTC)
  6. Inqvote Green Tentacle (Talk) 19:42, June 4, 2013 (UTC)

Object

Cav
  • Infobox needs reloading. At least the "mass" field is missing.
    • Done.
  • I feel like one of the Skywalker's - preferably Luke as the Grand Master and elder of the two - should be refered to by his surname throughout, with the other going by their given name. - Sir Cavalier of OneFarStar(Squadron channel) 22:10, April 1, 2013 (UTC)
    • I personally disagree. Neither is the subject of the article and both are used with roughly equal frequency, and so saying "Skywalker" is ambiguous and potentially confusing to the reader even if used consistently. Additionally, "Skywalkers" in the plural is used several times for both, and so a reader might have difficulty separating the singular from the plural on a quick scan of the article if the surname is used in the singular as well. —MJ— Council Chambers 00:46, April 2, 2013 (UTC)
501st
  • You keep referring to the Order. Is this the Jedi Order, or the Barran Do? If it is the Jedi Order, you should link to it. If it isn't you should state that the Barran Do were also known as the Order.
    • It's the Baran Do. Most instances have been reworded to use pronouns or other nouns; one instance still uses a lowercase "order" as a common noun, and the last capitalized "Order" is part of the formal title "Master of the Order", which is linked and should be obvious from the context.
  • "Ben then began to reveal to the Hidden Ones the many lies which Ziil told them—that there was only one tunnel in and out of the caverns and that a technique for telepathically reinstating the Hidden Ones existed—..." Are these examples of the lies, or the truths Ben told. It is not clear here.
    • Ziil's lies. Clarified.
  • The beginning paragraph of the body deviates quite a bit from Burra. Could you cut it out/change it up so it focuses on Burra more? 501st dogma(talk) 00:20, April 5, 2013 (UTC)
    • The first paragraph seems to focus quite well on Burra to me. If you meant the first section (or the plural "paragraphs"), then we have to establish what's going on with Luke and Ben, i.e. why are they visiting the Baran Do, why do they want to speak to Ziil, how did they discover the Hidden Ones, that kind of thing. It's necessary context; I can't just drop them in the caverns with no explanation of how they got there. It's possible that I could move the second and third paragraphs under the "Leaving the Hidden Ones" header to more clearly establish what the context is related to, but otherwise, I don't see anything that could easily be cut without hindering the reader's ability to understand what's going on, unless you have specific suggestions (which I'm open to). —MJ— Council Chambers 01:45, April 5, 2013 (UTC)
      • I guess its fine as it is. I'll continue the review soon. 501st dogma(talk) 14:22, April 6, 2013 (UTC)
  • I'm a little confused on why Luke wants to change the Hidden Ones' during the naming ceremony. 501st dogma(talk) 18:05, April 7, 2013 (UTC)
    • Does this help clarify it? —MJ— Comlink 19:01, April 7, 2013 (UTC)
      • That looks good, but after your change, you say that the Kel Dor changed his name to Burra when he became a Hidden One. I don't think you can refer to him as Burra until you say he changed his name to Burra. You could use the Kel Dor who would become Burra, or just call him a Kel Dor until you name him. I also think you should say in the intro that he changed his name to Burra. 501st dogma(talk) 20:31, April 7, 2013 (UTC)
Attack of the Clone
  • Any relevant images that can be added? CC7567 (talk) 18:50, May 14, 2013 (UTC)
    • The best I could do would be to put in an image of Luke or Ben, but such an image would be purely aesthetic and not directly supporting the article's text (since the subject of the article is Burra and not Luke or Ben), and I frankly feel that we should be doing less of that, not more, as it's not really defensible from a fair use standpoint. However, I can toss one in if you insist. —MJ— Holocomm 00:40, May 15, 2013 (UTC)
      • I don't see any harm in doing so. To put it simply, having an image can make an article more interesting to a visitor to the wiki, by having a point of visual depiction to spark interest. Unless there's a major issue, I would encourage you to find an image to add somewhere. CC7567 (talk) 04:55, May 15, 2013 (UTC)
        • Added the Luke and Ben portraits from the Atlas. —MJ— Comlink 02:29, May 16, 2013 (UTC)
Green Tentacle
  • "…that a technique for telepathically reinstating the Hidden Ones existed…" Can you elaborate on that a little, it's a bit vague. Green Tentacle (Talk) 12:13, June 1, 2013 (UTC)
    • Reworded. That was actually a slight factual error that I must have missed during my pre-nom cleanup, so thanks for calling attention to it. —MJ— Council Chambers 05:00, June 3, 2013 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 19:42, June 4, 2013 (UTC)