- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Vult
- Nominated by: Clone Commander Lee Talk 17:22, October 19, 2010 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: First project for WP:LE. 265 words.
(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
Support
- Hmmm...I like. Good article. I just got Outcast. I need to read it soon. MasterFred
(Whatever) 17:29, October 19, 2010 (UTC) - SoresuMakashi(Everything I tell you is a lie) 00:30, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 21:25, October 28, 2010 (UTC)- Grand Moff Tranner
(Comlink) 00:21, November 2, 2010 (UTC) - 1358 (Talk) 19:46, November 2, 2010 (UTC)
Object
Jujiggum
Context for Jade Shadow in the intro, please. Just a tiny bit.- Fixed.
Why do you say he served under Dorss? There is nothing in the novel that says that one serves under the other—or even that one always reports to the other at all.- Fixed.
You are missing information about Vult from the novel.- Should be in there now.
- You have added nothing except for his equipment, which is a completely separate objection. This remains. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:59, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- No idea what you're talking about.
- You are missing information about Vult. He only appears on 2 pages (at least, in the English version) of the novel. This shouldn't be too hard to locate. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:15, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- All in? Clone Commander Lee Talk 18:22, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Not quite; the breath mask was just one thing. Still a couple bits of info missing. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:28, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- All except that he came out of an airlock and that he went to abaft all is included. Clone Commander Lee Talk 16:50, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- You've got almost everything that I was looking for; but there is still one relevant thing missing (it is neither that he "came out of an airlock" or that he "went abaft"). Also, one piece of information that you added is incorrect. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:12, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Hope all fits now. If not I've got absolutely no idea what should be missing.
- The incorrect piece of information still remains. The bit you added is of absolutely no import or relevance. And you are still missing a piece of information about Vult. This should not be difficult to find. Vult appears in a mere two pages of the novel, and briefly within those two at that. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 19:22, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- All information should be now in there and correct. If not could you please give a hint.
- The incorrect piece still remains—I don't even see what you changed to try to fix this. And I really don't want to hand out even a hint, considering, once again, that he appears only briefly on two pages, but the missing info is regarding his appearance. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:05, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- All about his app. is in there.
- The incorrect bit still remains, though. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:34, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- This remains. You have yet to change anything to do with the piece of incorrect information. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:59, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- This is growing beyond ridiculous. You claim to have triple-checked every single word, yet one glaring mistake remains. It is minor, just one word, but it is still blatantly incorrect information. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:15, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- This remains. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 15:01, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- This is growing beyond ridiculous. You claim to have triple-checked every single word, yet one glaring mistake remains. It is minor, just one word, but it is still blatantly incorrect information. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:15, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- This remains. You have yet to change anything to do with the piece of incorrect information. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:59, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- The incorrect bit still remains, though. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:34, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- All about his app. is in there.
- The incorrect piece still remains—I don't even see what you changed to try to fix this. And I really don't want to hand out even a hint, considering, once again, that he appears only briefly on two pages, but the missing info is regarding his appearance. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:05, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- All information should be now in there and correct. If not could you please give a hint.
- The incorrect piece of information still remains. The bit you added is of absolutely no import or relevance. And you are still missing a piece of information about Vult. This should not be difficult to find. Vult appears in a mere two pages of the novel, and briefly within those two at that. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 19:22, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Hope all fits now. If not I've got absolutely no idea what should be missing.
- You've got almost everything that I was looking for; but there is still one relevant thing missing (it is neither that he "came out of an airlock" or that he "went abaft"). Also, one piece of information that you added is incorrect. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:12, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- All except that he came out of an airlock and that he went to abaft all is included. Clone Commander Lee Talk 16:50, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Not quite; the breath mask was just one thing. Still a couple bits of info missing. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:28, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- All in? Clone Commander Lee Talk 18:22, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- You are missing information about Vult. He only appears on 2 pages (at least, in the English version) of the novel. This shouldn't be too hard to locate. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:15, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- No idea what you're talking about.
- You have added nothing except for his equipment, which is a completely separate objection. This remains. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:59, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Should be in there now.
Vult's equipment deserves a mention.- Added.
- What's a "sensorstab?" I've never seen the phrase before, and nothing in the novel calls what Vult possesses a "sensorstab." Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:59, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- That is a translation from the German word and I have no idea how this is called in English. However, tried to add an explanation.
- This does not work. "Sensorstab" is not an English word (I've checked my own dictionary and multiple online dictionaries, and then I even googled it, all to no avail), and it is also not a Star Wars word, so it can't be used here. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:15, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Now?
- There has been no change here whatsoever. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:28, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Better?
- No. All you've done is say that he carried it in a backpack. Once again, you have failed to remove the word sensorstab. "Sensorstab" is not used in the novel. It is not an English word, and it is not a Star Wars word, so it cannot be used. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:12, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Fixed.
- Thank you, but please be a bit more detailed than just "an electric device"; especially since the novel gives a full description of the device and doesn't even call it "electric." Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 19:22, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Translation problems. Please try.
- This is ridiculously worse now. Firstly, "stab" does not work here at all; the only use of "stab" as a noun in English is the act of stabbing. Secondly, "clitting" is not technically an English word, although it is a slang word for a sexual act. But I highly doubt that's what you meant here. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:05, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Uh, oh. Try it.
- Hmm, an "aperture" is an opening, such as a hole, slit, or gap… this still doesn't fit the book's description of the device. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:34, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- "Vents" for sensors? What are you talking about? Again, this does not correspond whatsoever with what the book says. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:59, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Since you've failed to figure it out yourself, I'll provide you with the passage straight from the novel: "[Vult] carried an apparatus in a black backpack; a metal cable ran from it to a wandlike device, numerous sensor intakes along its length, which he held in his hand." Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:15, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Once again, you have taken this almost verbatim from the novel, please do not use almost the exact same phrase as is given. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:55, October 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Since you've failed to figure it out yourself, I'll provide you with the passage straight from the novel: "[Vult] carried an apparatus in a black backpack; a metal cable ran from it to a wandlike device, numerous sensor intakes along its length, which he held in his hand." Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:15, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- "Vents" for sensors? What are you talking about? Again, this does not correspond whatsoever with what the book says. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:59, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Hmm, an "aperture" is an opening, such as a hole, slit, or gap… this still doesn't fit the book's description of the device. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:34, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Uh, oh. Try it.
- This is ridiculously worse now. Firstly, "stab" does not work here at all; the only use of "stab" as a noun in English is the act of stabbing. Secondly, "clitting" is not technically an English word, although it is a slang word for a sexual act. But I highly doubt that's what you meant here. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:05, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Translation problems. Please try.
- Thank you, but please be a bit more detailed than just "an electric device"; especially since the novel gives a full description of the device and doesn't even call it "electric." Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 19:22, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Fixed.
- No. All you've done is say that he carried it in a backpack. Once again, you have failed to remove the word sensorstab. "Sensorstab" is not used in the novel. It is not an English word, and it is not a Star Wars word, so it cannot be used. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:12, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Better?
- There has been no change here whatsoever. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:28, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Now?
- This does not work. "Sensorstab" is not an English word (I've checked my own dictionary and multiple online dictionaries, and then I even googled it, all to no avail), and it is also not a Star Wars word, so it can't be used here. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:15, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- That is a translation from the German word and I have no idea how this is called in English. However, tried to add an explanation.
- What's a "sensorstab?" I've never seen the phrase before, and nothing in the novel calls what Vult possesses a "sensorstab." Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:59, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Added.
Vult did not check the Jade Shadow for "unusual things."- Hope it fits now.
- Firstly, you changed only one instance of this. Secondly, no, it does not: the word you replaced it with has the same exact meaning of "unusual" in this context. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:59, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Better? Clone Commander Lee Talk 18:09, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- No, you still indicate that he was looking for something irregular, which is false. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:15, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Now?
- Better, but please specify the results of his inspection. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:28, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Now?
- The phrase you chose is almost verbatim from the book and is grammatically incorrect; please use some synonyms and change up the wording. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:12, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Rephrased. Clone Commander Lee Talk 19:14, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Okay, but please fix your grammar. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 19:22, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Hope it is now better? Clone Commander Lee Talk 09:50, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- I suppose I'll be specific with the problems here: First off, why did you add "had?" That creates an unnecessary tense shift. Secondly, you don't gramatically say that he reported to Dorss; right now you gramatically say that he reported (in general, not to anyone in particular) that all items on the ship had previously corresponded with categorical limits that were somehow related to Dorss. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:05, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- OK now. Clone Commander Lee Talk 16:24, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Grammar issues remain here; this is a much simpler fix now (you're closer) and if this were the only case of this happening it's minor enough that I would fix it myself. However, grammar mistakes run ramprant in your articles, and having to object to the same things over and over again each time you nominate an article is tiring; you need to learn how to fix these yourself. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:34, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- This remains. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:59, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Grammar issues remain here; this is a much simpler fix now (you're closer) and if this were the only case of this happening it's minor enough that I would fix it myself. However, grammar mistakes run ramprant in your articles, and having to object to the same things over and over again each time you nominate an article is tiring; you need to learn how to fix these yourself. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:34, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Hope it is now better? Clone Commander Lee Talk 09:50, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Okay, but please fix your grammar. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 19:22, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Rephrased. Clone Commander Lee Talk 19:14, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- The phrase you chose is almost verbatim from the book and is grammatically incorrect; please use some synonyms and change up the wording. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:12, October 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Now?
- Better, but please specify the results of his inspection. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:28, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Now?
- No, you still indicate that he was looking for something irregular, which is false. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 18:15, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Better? Clone Commander Lee Talk 18:09, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Firstly, you changed only one instance of this. Secondly, no, it does not: the word you replaced it with has the same exact meaning of "unusual" in this context. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:59, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Hope it fits now.
- Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:47, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review. Clone Commander Lee Talk 17:53, October 20, 2010 (UTC)
Starting a new objection for it since it corresponds with the area covered by two of the above objections: grammar issues in the P&T.Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:34, October 22, 2010 (UTC)- I respond to the above objections here. All should be correct now. Clone Commander Lee Talk 16:44, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- This remains, as well. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:59, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- All above should be fixed. No incorrect info to be found and be sure that I triple-checked every word. To the second objection I tried five words for the desrciption but none of them seems to fit. Any ideas? Clone Commander Lee Talk 17:06, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Grammar issue in the P&T still remains, too. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:15, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- All above should be fixed. No incorrect info to be found and be sure that I triple-checked every word. To the second objection I tried five words for the desrciption but none of them seems to fit. Any ideas? Clone Commander Lee Talk 17:06, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- This remains, as well. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:59, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- I respond to the above objections here. All should be correct now. Clone Commander Lee Talk 16:44, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
Grammar in the intro is incorrect, now, too.Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:59, October 22, 2010 (UTC)- Fixed.
- Now information presented here is incorrect, too. Dorss did not inspect the Jade Shadow. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:15, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- All except the "incorrect" word should be fixed. Clone Commander Lee Talk 14:26, October 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Now information presented here is incorrect, too. Dorss did not inspect the Jade Shadow. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:15, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Fixed.
- I hope the description not is acceptable. The incorrect word was replaced with the correct. Thank you for your patience. Clone Commander Lee Talk 14:39, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Eh, what objection remains? Clone Commander Lee Talk 15:09, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- The incoorrect piece bit. Hint: it is in the P&T. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 15:10, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Now? Clone Commander Lee Talk 15:22, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- No. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 15:25, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Still? Clone Commander Lee Talk 16:07, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Yes, still. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:14, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Now. Clone Commander Lee Talk 16:26, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Ironically, yes. You found the right piece of information, but you've just replaced it with something else that is incorrect. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:35, October 25, 2010 (UTC)
- Now. Clone Commander Lee Talk 17:45, October 25, 2010 (UTC)
- Yes, you've got it now. In the future, please be extremely careful that all of the information you present in your articles is factually correct, particularly since some things may be lost in translation between the German and English versions. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 21:25, October 28, 2010 (UTC)
- Now. Clone Commander Lee Talk 17:45, October 25, 2010 (UTC)
- Ironically, yes. You found the right piece of information, but you've just replaced it with something else that is incorrect. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:35, October 25, 2010 (UTC)
- Now. Clone Commander Lee Talk 16:26, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Yes, still. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:14, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Still? Clone Commander Lee Talk 16:07, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- No. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 15:25, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Now? Clone Commander Lee Talk 15:22, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- The incoorrect piece bit. Hint: it is in the P&T. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 15:10, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Eh, what objection remains? Clone Commander Lee Talk 15:09, October 24, 2010 (UTC)
Xd1358
Uh… quote says Dorss is a lieutenant, while the article says he's a captain. Explanation? 1358 (Talk) 16:18, November 2, 2010 (UTC)- Because I'm an incompetent moron. Fixed. Clone Commander Lee Talk 18:10, November 2, 2010 (UTC)
Comments
Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 19:46, November 2, 2010 (UTC)