Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Mok

< Wookieepedia:Good article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Mok

  • Nominated by: Chack Jadson (Talk) 21:36, 18 May 2009 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: There's jizz in his pants.

(3 ACs/5 Users/8 Total)

Support

  1. Per IRC review. Kilson Likes PIE 22:11, 18 May 09 (UTC)
  2. ACvote Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research (Comlink) 23:56, 18 May 2009 (UTC)
  3. ACvote CC7567 (talk) 00:40, 19 May 2009 (UTC)
  4. Good work. Jonjedigrandmaster (Jujiggum) 01:18, 19 May 2009 (UTC)
  5. JangFett Talk 23:02, 21 May 2009 (UTC)
  6. SoresuMakashi(Everything I tell you is a lie) 13:07, 23 May 2009 (UTC)
  7. Nice work.—Darthtyler (Talk) 00:19, 24 May 2009 (UTC)
  8. ACvote Graestan(Talk) 22:39, 26 May 2009 (UTC)

Object

  1. The Grand Master gets picky
    • "On the flight to the palace, Rostu earned Mok's ire by vomiting on the Weequay's boots, which he valued very highly." I know what you mean, but it could be reworded better.
      • Coudl you explain exactly what you mean? I'm afraid I don't get quite how this could be written better.
        • You say "which he valued very highly", but you just mentioned two "he"s. I know what you're saying here, and it's not a super big deal (like I said, I'm getting pretty picky here), but I think it could be tweaked slightly just for clarity. Jonjedigrandmaster (Jujiggum) 22:48, 18 May 2009 (UTC)
    • Context for Mercantile Guild
      • Meh, it's a guild of merchants. No info is given about it. I think the name gives all the context needed.
    • That's all I could find. Well done :) Jonjedigrandmaster (Jujiggum) 22:25, 18 May 2009 (UTC)
  2. The Grand Moff gets pickier:
    • I think the intro could use some expansion, including details on their arrest.
    • The Interstellar Trade League should be mentioned in both the intro and the bio.
    • "The male Weequay Mok worked with the Human smuggler Drach Coven. The two smuggled goods onboard their ship, the Far Ranger." - two short sentences that would probably look better combined as one.
    • Are there any details on Rostu's killing of the Imperial officer?
    • What happened to Rostu? Didn't he get the Far Ranger? If so, this should go in the bio and even in the intro.
    • Well done. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research (Comlink) 23:12, 18 May 2009 (UTC)
  3. Attack of the Clone
    • First sentence is a bit confusing; unless there's a specific reason for it, I believe the fact that he was both a co-pilot and a smuggler can be mentioned together, because it's a little odd the way it's currently worded.
      • Changed.
    • "who had had'": yeah, it's grammatically fine, but I just always find it too redundant. Can it be reworded?
      • Eh, not really well. I honestly think it works as is.
    • "However, his partner, Coven": I don't think this is needed; it's already implied before, and it seems strange mentioning it down this far. Also, it implies that the two were romantically involved, because a specific situation wasn't set.
      • Fixed.
    • "Mok tried to break free and attacked a stormtrooper": it's not very clear in the sense that it's not stated what happened of his attempt to break free.
      • Changed.
    • Looketh fineth otherwiseth. CC7567 (talk) 00:10, 19 May 2009 (UTC)
  4. Fett's 2 cents
    • Can't find a main image for the infobox?
      • Discussed in IRC channel JangFett Talk 23:43, 21 May 2009 (UTC)
    • JangFett Talk 23:02, 21 May 2009 (UTC)
  5. Soresu
    • I think the location of his death should be in the "died" section of the infobox.
      • Done.
    • Wouldn't it be correct to list the Empire in affiliations? After all, they were "hired" by them.
      • Added.
    • Good work. SoresuMakashi(Everything I tell you is the truth) 09:12, 22 May 2009 (UTC)

Comments

  • 334 words. Also, Graestan, if you see this, I need to talk to you about starting the subpage for this. Chack Jadson (Talk) 21:36, 18 May 2009 (UTC)

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 22:39, 26 May 2009 (UTC)