Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Mallohe

The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Mallohe

• Nominated by: Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 13:12, September 13, 2012 (UTC)
• Nomination comments: An Imperial from Star Wars: The Old Republic

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)

Support

1. IFYLOFD ^{(Floyd's crib)} 23:21, October 1, 2012 (UTC)
2. Cavalier One^{(Squadron channel)} 10:03, October 9, 2012 (UTC)
3. Commander Code-8 ^{To say hi, press 42} 05:26, October 18, 2012 (UTC)
4. Excellent subject.—Tommy 9281 Wednesday, October 24, 2012, 03:27 UTC
5. Good work. Cade Calrayn 20:58, October 26, 2012 (UTC)

Object

Floyd

• Intro: "He also wanted Mallohe to send him an Imperial individual" It seems like "he" refers to Kras, but it sounds from the way the sentence before it is structured that "he" refers to the person who gave her the mission to work with Kras.
  • Fixed.--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 19:51, September 30, 2012 (UTC)
• Intro: "Lieutenant Mallohe managed to meet with an individual who had been involved in a battle attack" A battle attack?
  • Fixed.--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 19:51, September 30, 2012 (UTC)
• That's all. Nice job. IFYLOFD ^{(Floyd's crib)} 18:38, September 30, 2012 (UTC)
  • Thanks for the review.--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 19:51, September 30, 2012 (UTC)

Not Quite

• The first four sentences of the intro are choppy and need rewriting. The four could easily become two.—Tommy 9281 Thursday, October 18, 2012, 11:41 UTC
  • Better?--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 13:18, October 19, 2012 (UTC)
  • Not quite. Introduce her as a lieutenant in the first sentence, and talk about the date and her teñure afterward.—Tommy 9281 Tuesday, October 23, 2012, 21:11 UTC
    • How about now?--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 23:44, October 23, 2012 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 21:00, October 26, 2012 (UTC)

• Yes, I am still here...--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 13:12, September 13, 2012 (UTC)