- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Grunta
- Nominated by: ToRsO bOy (talk) 14:44, 31 July 2021 (UTC)
- Nomination comments:
- WookieeProject (optional): WP:NOVELS
(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
(Votes required: No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)
Support
UberSoldat93 
(talk) 06:56, 29 August 2021 (UTC)- Good work! LucaRoR (Talk) 16:54, 31 August 2021 (UTC)
- MasterFred
(talk) 21:58, 11 September 2021 (UTC) - JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 04:01, 23 September 2021 (UTC)
- OOM 224 16:14, 1 October 2021 (UTC)
Object
UberSoldat
Date note needs to mention Grunta, where he died, and when.UberSoldat93 (talk) 11:32, 5 August 2021 (UTC)
I see room for subsectioning and another quote.Why is Grunta's profession mentioned at the very end of the Biography on the article that is supposed to be about Grunta himself?In Personality and traits, I'm unable to see the relevance of the first paragraph's last sentence.UberSoldat93 (talk) 08:32, 7 August 2021 (UTC)
Does the novel refer to Muunilinst as a "planet"?UberSoldat93 (talk) 09:25, 7 August 2021 (UTC)
Too many sentences start with "Grunta did this...," can you introduce more variation?"Grunta himself also died in the short melee when the swoop's remains crashed into him, killing him instantly." Saying he died twice here is kind of redundant."One Muun in particular, Chenik Kruun, was known to be cold-blooded and emotionless, yet it was said that he almost smiled when he heard of Grunta's demise..." How does the novel present this information?UberSoldat93 (talk) 09:12, 9 August 2021 (UTC)
- '"We race for the Muun Chenik Kruun." Haari Ikreme unleashed a rapid string of chokes and coughs that Han suspected might be laughter. "A cold-blooded, emotionless sand snake if I ever saw one, but when he heard about Grunta's death, he nearly smiled. Nothing would make him happier than beating Nal Kenuun."' ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:15, 15 August 2021 (UTC)
- Then it would be good to specify who's saying this in the body. UberSoldat93 (talk) 11:25, 15 August 2021 (UTC)
- Then it would be good to specify who's saying this in the body. UberSoldat93
- '"We race for the Muun Chenik Kruun." Haari Ikreme unleashed a rapid string of chokes and coughs that Han suspected might be laughter. "A cold-blooded, emotionless sand snake if I ever saw one, but when he heard about Grunta's death, he nearly smiled. Nothing would make him happier than beating Nal Kenuun."' ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:15, 15 August 2021 (UTC)
"When he was not racing, Grunta engaged in the armed robbery of individuals with the help of his Dug companions." I don't see how this is relevant in "Personality and traits," this is a biographical detail.After going through the article again, I really think the reactions to Grunta's death are much better suited for the Biography rather than its current place.UberSoldat93 (talk) 10:48, 24 August 2021 (UTC)
Minnabird
"information on how to contact the Kenuun" Is this character really referred to as "the Kenuun"? I didn't want to do a copy-edit in case that's correct, but his article doesn't seem to use that.The placement of Grunta's physical description feels kind of out of place, an afterthought at the end of an unrelated paragraph. Not sure what the fix is, as the description is so short; maybe stick it up at the top of the section, at the beginning of the first paragraph?I made some copy-edits, let me know if you approve. I also think you could stand to break up a few of the longer sentences, but that's really up to you. Minnabird (talk) 00:27, 10 August 2021 (UTC)- They look good. Thanks! 11:15, 15 August 2021 (UTC)
Fred strikes back
Pilaan should really be introduced as his place of residence in the first sentence of the intro.- Added. ToRsO bOy (talk) 14:28, 11 September 2021 (UTC)
- Remember to re-read the section you change. You had "the city of..." in two consecutive sentences after the change and a duplicate link for city. I've fixed it this time, but always double check your changes to make sure they don't cause other issues that need addressing. MasterFred(talk) 21:51, 11 September 2021 (UTC)
- Remember to re-read the section you change. You had "the city of..." in two consecutive sentences after the change and a duplicate link for city. I've fixed it this time, but always double check your changes to make sure they don't cause other issues that need addressing. MasterFred
- Added. ToRsO bOy (talk) 14:28, 11 September 2021 (UTC)
You should mention Grunta's employment under Kenuun in the intro.MasterFred(talk) 22:42, 10 September 2021 (UTC)
- I added an image. Feel free to remove if you don't like the way it looks. MasterFred(talk) 21:58, 11 September 2021 (UTC)
Ecks Dee
"After a short skirmish, the Dugs chose to retreat after one of their members was killed by Solo when he successfully shot the swoop's starboard engine, crashing it with a fiery explosion. Grunta himself also died in the short melee when the swoop's remains crashed into him." A little bit confused about the chronology here. In the first sentence, is the Dug member you mention Grunta or someone else? Do the Dugs decide to retreat after the first Dug is killed but before Grunta is killed? This part is a bit confusing right now.1358 (Talk) 16:11, 12 September 2021 (UTC)
OOM
Nice to see a Rebel Force nom. However, you'll want to vary the choice of words, such as "when" and "short," just to list a couple of examples.OOM 224 20:45, 23 September 2021 (UTC)One more thing: parts of quotes that are italicised in the book should be italicised in the article's quotes as well.OOM 224 15:08, 1 October 2021 (UTC)
Comments
Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 16:14, 1 October 2021 (UTC)