Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Farng

< Wookieepedia:Good article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Farng

  • Nominated by: IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 04:00, August 17, 2010 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: They may take our lives, but they'll never take our FREEDOM!

(4 ACs/1 Users/5 Total)

Support

  1. -- 1358 (Talk) 18:06, August 19, 2010 (UTC)
  2. ACvote CC7567 (talk) 01:37, August 25, 2010 (UTC)
  3. ACvote Toprawa and Ralltiir 20:43, August 25, 2010 (UTC)
  4. ACvote Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research (Comlink) 00:10, August 30, 2010 (UTC)
  5. ACvote Grunny (talk) 01:24, August 30, 2010 (UTC)

Object

Xd1358
  • Something very minor: "Farng was a Human male carbonite trader and leader of the Carbonite Miners' Union who was active in the Empress Teta system in the years leading up to the Great Sith War." If this is refering to the union, please change to 'which'. If it refers to Farng, could you possibly remove 'who was' to avoid any confusion?
    • Removed.
  • This is also slightly confusing: "Farng was discovered and captured, and sentenced to death in one of the Krath's public execution ceremonies." It sounds that he was sentenced to death during the public execution ceremony. Could you please clarify a bit? This same objection applies for the bio.
    • Changed in both cases.
  • In the Bts, you use an emdash, but I don't think that it should be used in this case. However, I'm not sure about this, so if you know this thing better than me, feel free to ignore this objection.
    • Changed to a regular dash.
  • Very nit-picky objections. :P -- 1358 (Talk) 16:58, August 18, 2010 (UTC)
Attack of the Clone
  • Is it at all possible to cut down the intro? It's currently almost half of the length of the rest of the article, which isn't a very good balance.
    • I shaved off a bit of it, but I'm not sure how much more I can get rid of.
  • "However" tends to be rather prominent in this article. Please limit your usage of it. CC7567 (talk) 20:32, August 23, 2010 (UTC)
    • Varied my word choice. Thanks for the review. IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 01:04, August 25, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 01:24, August 30, 2010 (UTC)