Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Boroklif

The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Boroklif

Nominated by: Braha'tok enthusiast (talk) 16:23, April 11, 2020 (UTC)
Nomination comments: First WP:GE contribution. A swerve from the usual Battlefront: Twilight Company articles.

(Votes required: No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

~~I think the intro should specify that the Separatist base is on Mokivj.~~
"However, the handmaiden Duja was caught investigating the Separatists and was killed by the Separatists shortly thereafter." This should be reworded to avoid using "Separatists" twice in the same sentence.Fan26 (Talk) 04:47, May 4, 2020 (UTC)
- Both addressed. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{(Hello there)} 07:06, May 4, 2020 (UTC)
"However, the handmaiden Duja was caught investigating the Separatists and was killed by them shortly thereafter. After Duja's superior, Senator Padmé Amidala, disappeared while searching for her handmaiden," I think all of this would flow better if you introduced Padme first, then clarified her as searching for Duja who was killed, and then finished by saying Padme herself disappeared, preferably all in one sentence. Fan26 (Talk) 12:36, May 4, 2020 (UTC)
- I don't think your suggestion would work as Duja comes first and is actively caught and killed by the Separatists who Boroklif is affiliated with. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{(Hello there)} 15:28, May 4, 2020 (UTC)
  - Fair enough Fan26 (Talk) 20:14, May 4, 2020 (UTC)

"Duja was caught investigating the Separatists and was killed by them shortly thereafter." - Are the "Separatists" and "them" in this sentence referring to Boroklif and his mates? If so, this should be made more clear.
- From what I got from the novel, Duja was killed by the Separatists on Batuu. Whether Boroklif was part of that or not it's not specified as he's mentioned after Anakin and Thrawn leave the planet. Does this work better? Braha'tok enthusiast ^{(Hello there)} 20:50, May 15, 2020 (UTC)
~~"Skywalker defeated Boroklif's comrades" - Later info implies Boroklif was also defeated, this should be clarified.~~ Tommy-Macaroni 15:51, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
- Thrawn suggests that there was a possibility of more Separatists that they may not have come across, which suggests Boroklif might not have been one of the ones they came across. How should I proceed?
  - I guess it all depends on if you believe Anakin's claims that Boroklif himself was compromised. If there's no reason to believe he's lying, I'd assume he's telling the truth. Tommy-Macaroni 12:52, May 16, 2020 (UTC)
    - It looks to me like Anakin realised that Boroklif was among the defeated Separatists or something along those lines. Changed it. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{(Hello there)} 14:49, May 16, 2020 (UTC)
      - Cool, I'm perfectly happy with that inference. Tommy-Macaroni 16:46, May 16, 2020 (UTC)

"However, the handmaiden Duja was caught investigating the Separatists and was killed by them shortly thereafter." Using "however" here carries the notation that Duja was caught despite Boroklif shipping shit. The two events aren't really connected. 1358 ^(Talk) 17:55, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
- Fixed. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{(Hello there)} 20:50, May 15, 2020 (UTC)

Welcome to WP:GE! One quick thing: can we get just a brief explanation that Skywalker made the claims about Boroklif being compromised in order to avoid suspicion? Even just adding "to avoid suspicion" could suffice. This is for both the intro and the body. MasterFredcerique 03:05, May 17, 2020 (UTC)
- Done. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{(Hello there)} 10:54, May 18, 2020 (UTC)

~~Per my objection to Special Unit One here, Star Wars: Thrawn (novel series) can be incorporated into the BTS.~~ UberSoldat93 (talk) 08:53, May 18, 2020 (UTC)
- Done. Braha'tok enthusiast ^{(Hello there)} 10:54, May 18, 2020 (UTC)

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 05:46, May 20, 2020 (UTC)