Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Netus

< Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Netus

(4 Inqs/2 Users/6 Total)

Support

  1. Inqvote Prenommed. Xicer9Atgar(Combadge) 03:50, October 14, 2010 (UTC)
  2. Nice and short. --Imperialles 00:48, October 26, 2010 (UTC)
  3. Inqvote Toprawa and Ralltiir 05:25, November 13, 2010 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote Green Tentacle (Talk) 20:49, November 18, 2010 (UTC)
  5. Inqvote—Tommy 9281 03:50, November 20, 2010 (UTC)
  6. Great work! This guy's a really cool character, too. Menkooroo 01:00, November 29, 2010 (UTC)

Object

Toprawa
Da Mystery of Chessboxin
  • "…had attacked Republic and Jedi relief forces on the planet." In the intro you say that Qel-Droma requested the Republic's help prior to their arrival; this makes it seem as though Republic forces were already on the planet.
    • Fixed.
  • &"a contingent of Knights—Nomi Sunrider, Cay Qel-Droma, Dace Diath, the Twi'lek Tott Doneeta, the Vultan Sylvar," There were no Vultans in that group...
    • Bah, absent-minded mistake. Corrected.
  • "Netus ordered the Republic fleet to gather at Kemplex IX in the hopes of running the enemy down." You need to say why Netus wanted them to go Kemplex. You touch on it slightly a few sentences later, but if you do it upon Kemplex's first mention, it'll be satisfied. You'll probably have to slightly rework the later sentences as a result. Only slightly.
    • Addressed.
      • Turns out you didn't have to. Good job.—Tommy 9281 20:11, November 19, 2010 (UTC)
  • Will continue later, have to go back to work. Impressive so far.—Tommy 9281 19:10, November 19, 2010 (UTC)
Oy.
  • What do you think about splitting both of the bio's paragraphs in half? They're pretty long; the article might be more aesthetically pleasing, and more likely to hold the reader's attention, if the bio consisted of four smaller ones. Two bio subsections, each with two paragraphs, might be a good idea, too. Whaddya think?
    • Split up.
  • How about another picture in the latter half of the bio? There's room. And there would definitely be room if there were two bio subsections and four paragraphs! :D
    • Addressed.
      • Are there any other images of him from The Sith War 2? If images of a character are available, I think they're always preferable. I can help you out if you tell me which image ya want. Menkooroo 03:52, November 26, 2010 (UTC)
        • Well, do you have The Sith War 2? Because there was one picture of him that I couldn't get a good scan of. IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 00:16, November 27, 2010 (UTC)
          • Yeah! I have a good scan of it. I found three pretty cool images of him; maybe one of them is the one you were thinking of. I have he, Nomi, Vodo and co. getting aboard an airspeeder; him firing a blaster to the right of the page after getting out of the speeder; him firing a blaster into the sky at some attacking fighters while brandishing a sword in the other hand. Let me know how much you want cropped out, too; the latter two images are pretty tall if the entire panel is used. Or, if you'd like to crop them yourself, I can e-mail you the images. Either way is fine. Sorry to be so persistent about this objection, btw. Menkooroo 05:15, November 27, 2010 (UTC)
            • Yeah, the one I was thinking of was the one of him firing the blaster to the right of the page. But don't worry about it; I was finally able to get a good scan of it. Added to the article. IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 18:47, November 28, 2010 (UTC)
  • Does the Orron III senator have an article?
    • Created.
  • "Having made his point, Thon and Sunrider left the room without another word." reads kind of weird. It seems like "him" consists of both Thon and Sunrider.
    • Addressed.
  • The first paragraph of the bio has two references to [4] in a row.
    • Fixed.
  • Behind the scenes: Is he really only in one panel of The Freedon Nadd Uprising? If so, is the rest of the info from the bio's first paragraph from the audio drama? If so, why not mention the audio drama in the bts (also, any idea who voiced him)? Menkooroo 07:25, November 25, 2010 (UTC)
    • Sorry, can't find who voiced him anywhere. Added a mention in the BtS. IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 02:26, November 26, 2010 (UTC)
  • Sorry, one more: Is there an applicable quote, either from TFNU or from its audio adaptation, that could be used for the first bio section? And could the quote that's currently the bio's main quote be moved down to the second bio section? Menkooroo 06:13, November 27, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 01:11, November 29, 2010 (UTC)