Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Malakili

The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Malakili

• Nominated by: Cwedin^(talk) 03:29, August 7, 2016 (UTC)
• Nomination comments: A GAN that was blindsided by Aftermath: Life Debt.

(3 Inqs/5 Users/8 Total)

(Votes required: No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

1. Nice work. - AV-6R7^{Crew Pit} 18:39, August 12, 2016 (UTC)
2. The Brave Goldfish (talk) 21:55, October 25, 2016 (EET)
3. Cevan (talk) 01:10, October 29, 2016 (UTC)
4. Never expected this guy to have such a life --Lewisr (talk) 01:12, October 29, 2016 (UTC)
   • Probably one of my favorite background characters in the whole saga, and a great article to go along with him! --Jabot164 21:23, November 23, 2016 (EST) (Vote struck, reason: Per policy: User has not made 50 main namespace edits -- Darth Culator ^(Talk) 18:36, January 8, 2017 (UTC))
5. --Lelal Mekha ^{(Audience Room)} 20:13, September 22, 2017 (UTC)
6. Good job. 1358 ^(Talk) 01:53, February 11, 2018 (UTC)
7. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 22:19, March 22, 2018 (UTC)
8. Supreme Emperor (talk) 15:17, March 27, 2018 (UTC)

Object

AV

• Star Wars: Absolutely Everything You Need to Know confirms that Pateesa was a male rancor; as such, this should be mentioned in the article and all instances of "it" in reference to Pateesa should be changed to a male personal pronoun. - 17:56, August 12, 2016 (UTC)
  • Fixed. - Cwedin^(talk) 18:23, August 12, 2016 (UTC)

Ayrehead

• The article is going to need a update due to Star Wars: Complete Locations. The book still claims that Malakili and Porcellus start up a restaurant in Mos Eisley after the rancor's death. It also shows his room which should probably be mentioned in some way, perhaps its location in the castle at least. Ayrehead02 (talk) 13:56, October 9, 2016 (UTC)
  • Alright, thanks for the heads up! (again) - Cwedin^(talk) 16:18, October 9, 2016 (UTC)

Cevan

• A canon page will need to be made for mayor. Cevan (talk) 23:37, October 28, 2016 (UTC)
  • Done. - Cwedin^(talk) 01:02, October 29, 2016 (UTC)

LelalMekha

• Star Wars: The Force Awakens: Head-to-Head has a few elements you should add to the article: he weighs 95 kilograms and is described as an antisocial who only shows tenderness and sympathy towards animals. He felt sorry for the rancor's brutal existence, and planned to one day escape with the beast. --Lelal Mekha ^{(Audience Room)} 09:11, April 3, 2017 (UTC)
  • Thanks for finding that! At this rate, Lucasfilm might as well make Malakili: A Star Wars Story. - Cwedin^(talk) 20:22, April 3, 2017 (UTC)

Ecks Dee

• Preliminary objections: Do we really need to employ a scroll box for the Notes and references? There's no scrollbar at all in Monobook and the LG recommends no scrollbox with less than 40 references.
  • Not needed at all.
• The External links sections appears a bit overpopulated. Not every cursory mention on SW.com requires listing. See if you can cut it down to the most relevant stuff.
  • Done.
• Instead of listing just "Star Wars: Card Trader" in the Sources, you should use {{Topps}} and list individual cards.
  • I didn't see Card Trader in the sources, but I checked out the app and found a few relevant cards to add.
    • Yeah, it was removed earlier by a bot.
• Do we really need to include (Formerly) in the infobox? From our point of view, everything happened a long time ago.
  • Totally agree.
• Can you cut down on the intro a bit? It's quite long for an article with just two Bio sections.
  • Done.
• No quote for "Beastmaster for the Hutts"?
  • There aren't any quotes directly relating to Malakili, but I've added a quote regarding Pateesa's death.
• The first half of the Bio is really emdash heavy. Emdashes are useful but should be used sparingly as they break the flow of the text. See if you can remove at least some of them. 1358 ^(Talk) 20:03, September 22, 2017 (UTC)
  • I've gone ahead and cleaned up the second half as well. - Cwedin^(talk) 01:31, October 3, 2017 (UTC)
• "the sheriff formed an alliance with a group of Tusken Raiders." Who is "sheriff" referring to here?
  • It's referring to Vanth. I've added more context.
    • It's still not really clear in the intro. 1358 ^(Talk) 19:37, October 23, 2017 (UTC)
      • How about now?
• "After Malakili's stay in Freetown, he was reunited with Porcellus, the former head chef of Jabba's Palace." This is a bit poorly worded. His stay came to an end because he was reunited with Porcellus, right? The departure happened as a consequence of the reunion, not "after" it.
  • That's not necessarily the case. Complete Locations maintains the Legends event of Malakili and Porcellus opening a restaurant, but the Aftermath books make no mention of it. We don't really know why Malakili left Freetown or when he met with Porcellus.
    • The "eventually" you added does the trick.
• I feel like the fourth and fifth paragraphs of "Finding purpose" could be condensed; they feel very PBP at times. You don't need to describe every single line uttered in the encounter.
  • I've culled the heck out of it.
• The sheriff issue from above is present in the body as well. Law enforcement doesn't automatically mean sheriff.
  • Fixed.
• The S&A section could probably accommodate an image; maybe one of the creatures/species he trained? 1358 ^(Talk) 17:57, October 10, 2017 (UTC)
  • I've thrown a rancor pic in there. - Cwedin^(talk) 04:35, October 19, 2017 (UTC)
• I feel like the bio could use another section break. Maybe right before the sentence that starts with "In 5 ABY,"?
  • Done. The books don't have any quotes for that section, so I might throw in another line from Jabba.
• Mos Pelgo could probably use a word or two of context.
  • Done.
• In the same sentence, it's a bit unclear whether he made it all the way to Mos Pelgo or if he was found on the way there.
  • Fixed.
• Do we ever learn how that Red Key encounter ended? Did they chase them out of Freetown? Some closure would be nice.
  • Nope. The story just ends with Vanth confronting Movellan.
• You have two clauses with "Malakili believed" in the PT (even though they're in different paragraphs), maybe a synonym could be used.
  • Changed believed to thought.
• "Vanth asked Malakili if he could train a Huttlet, and Malakili replied that Hutts were sentient beings, not pets." This sentence could be rewritten from Malakili's perspective instead of describing his reply: "Malakili considered the Hutts sentient beings, not pets..."
  • Done.
• Can ROTJ's release date be sourced to The Making of Return of the Jedi? 1358 ^(Talk) 19:37, October 23, 2017 (UTC)
  • Yep. - Cwedin^(talk) 03:01, November 6, 2017 (UTC)
• The PT needs some restructuring. Right now it reads more like a recounting of his biography, save for the last paragraph, which neatly collects his Hutt dealings in one place. If I may suggest:
  • Paragraph 1: Physical description, feelings towards animals (mostly what you have right now but move the sarlacc stuff here as well)
  • Paragraph 2: His apparent crippling depression and feeling of uselessness. I recommend you move sentence 2 (and 1?) from paragraph 3 here as well.
  • Paragraph 3: Seems pretty good, except I see what I said about paragraph 2.
  • Paragraph 4: Good as is.
  • Let me know what you think. This is of course by no means the way to do it, just a way. 1358 ^(Talk) 23:01, November 6, 2017 (UTC)
    • I like your suggestions, and I've updated the section with them. - Cwedin^(talk) 00:14, November 13, 2017 (UTC)
• The P&T and the S&A sections in particular seem to use "Malakili" only. Please go through these sections and replace at least some mentions with synonyms such as the Corellian, the beastmaster, the human etc. 1358 ^(Talk) 22:59, November 23, 2017 (UTC)
  • Done. - Cwedin^(talk) 01:14, December 1, 2017 (UTC)
    • Sorry about the delay. I will try to finish my review this week. 1358 ^(Talk) 21:59, January 1, 2018 (UTC)
• "Having abandoned the palace, he contemplated feeding himself to Jabba's sarlacc as a means of committing suicide." I feel like this sentence would be more appropriate in the next paragraph.
  • I've dropped the last two sentences to the next paragraph.
• The automatic backup link feature of {{SW}} was removed recently, so you'll need to provide them manually. 1358 ^(Talk) 00:30, January 19, 2018 (UTC)
  • Done. - Cwedin^(talk) 04:15, January 19, 2018 (UTC)
• Looking at the intro in the default skin, it seems like it could benefit from being split into three paragraphs instead of two.
  • Done.
    • Two consecutive intro paragraphs that start with "In X ABY, ..." gets a bit boring. Can we please have some variation? 1358 ^(Talk) 15:22, February 10, 2018 (UTC)
      • I've dropped 5 ABY. It's not really essential because the previous paragraph mentions months passing. - Cwedin^(talk) 01:45, February 11, 2018 (UTC)
• The article is still in Category:Pages with missing permanent archival links and I suspect you need to pass an archived timestamp to {{Databank}} as well. For whatever reason, starwars.com has recently worked really poorly with IA so double-check that all your SW.com backup links actually load. If not, you'll need to use webcitation or another backup site. 1358 ^(Talk) 21:26, February 1, 2018 (UTC)
  • The SW.com backups on IA appear to be working. However, the Databank pages don't seem to like IA, so I've settled with archive.is. That did the trick, and the article is no longer listed in the missing links category. - Cwedin^(talk) 22:47, February 6, 2018 (UTC)

Toprawa

• I'd recommend just removing the "Luke Defeats the Rancor" video clip from the Sources list. SW.com has a lot of film clips like that that don't add any specialized information. I think we can pretty much just ignore those for practicality's sake.
  • Done.
• The LG says to restrict listing Blog posts in the External links to those with critical relevance. Blog posts like "5 Really Cool Things!" are exactly the type that are not critical. You should consider which ones to remove there; I would say "9 Creatures" is one that should definitely be. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 20:59, March 12, 2018 (UTC)
  • I'm only going to keep the Mysteries article. It's the only one actually referenced. - Cwedin^(talk) 05:33, March 21, 2018 (UTC)
• I'm curious why in the final Bio subsection quote you place the "of" between brackets, since he audibly says it in that sound clip. Does the book not format it that way?
  • "of" is only in the audio, not the book.
    • Interesting. I suppose we give canon precedence to the novel over the audiobook. It's kind of a weird situation, but I guess the way you're formatting it is the best way to go. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 22:19, March 22, 2018 (UTC)
• I left a redlink for waterskin, which you should fill in.
  • Done.
• I'm confused by what this is supposed to mean exactly. Are the Tuskens leaving the settlement alone? Because it reads as if Vanth is, which doesn't make sense to me, since he's the sheriff. "...so he made a deal with a group of Tusken Raiders, agreeing to leave the settlement alone in exchange for water."
  • Fixed.
• Reference 26 should use the short story citation template. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 04:45, March 22, 2018 (UTC)
  • Done.
• You should add the correct Card Trader citation template to the main image's source field. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 05:18, March 22, 2018 (UTC)
  • Done. - Cwedin^(talk) 22:12, March 22, 2018 (UTC)

SE

• Under the section Finding Purpose, you say that Malakili, when asked if he had any skills, admitted to being a beastmaster while in the P&T you say he was asked if he was a beastmaster. Can you clarify which it is? Supreme Emperor (talk) 03:04, March 16, 2018 (UTC)
  • I've expanded Finding Purpose a bit, should be clear now. - Cwedin^(talk) 05:33, March 21, 2018 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 15:18, March 27, 2018 (UTC)