Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Haja Estree

< Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Haja Estree

  • Nominated by: BloodOfIrizi (talk) 17:36, 15 July 2022 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: pakistani's in star wars >>>>
  • Date Archived: 00:26, 3 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Final word count: 1822 words (365 introduction, 1125 body, 332 behind the scenes)
  • Word count at nomination time: 1719 words (362 introduction, 1095 body, 262 behind the scenes)
  • WookieeProject (optional):

(3 Inqs/4 Users/7 Total)

(Votes required: No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. DFaceG (talk) 22:17, 22 October 2022 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote Nice work. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 17:24, 24 October 2022 (UTC)
  3. An interesting character and an excellent page. Great work on your first true FAN, Ziara, I look forward to the next one. Samonic Signatureicon (Talk) 18:15, 25 October 2022 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote LucaRoR Sigil of House Serenno (Talk) 09:11, 1 April 2023 (UTC)
  5. Inqvote Objections handled via Discord over the last months / did review ages ago —spookywillowwtalk 23:03, 1 April 2023 (UTC)
  6. NotBoop (talk) 07:04, 2 April 2023 (UTC)
  7. AmazinglyCool Nightsisters symbol - JFO (talk) 22:30, 2 April 2023 (UTC)

Object

Jade Moonstroller
  • I am not sure the entire Personality & Traits section can be sourced to that single reference. Jade Moonstroller (talk) 18:25, 15 July 2022 (UTC)
Samonic
  • Duplicate link.
  • Infobox image should be neutral; it seems Haja is midsentence. Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 20:56, 15 July 2022 (UTC)
  • Context for the Devastator please. Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 21:06, 15 July 2022 (UTC)
    • done
  • Missing {{Mediacat}}.
    • first time using Mediacat, does that work? BloodOfIrizi (talk) 21:29, 15 July 2022 (UTC)
  • I've read through the article but I will give it a proper review on Sunday. (review note)Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 21:13, 15 July 2022 (UTC)
  • Ziara: I've noticed that you have no good articles to your name. I thought I would let you know, as one of the FAN rules is the following: …be nominated by a user who has promoted at least one article to Good article status. And if you don't have a good article, you can't nominate a FAN. Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 09:35, 23 July 2022 (UTC)
  • Missing link to death in the intro.
  • The "Later" in the intro's second paragraphs shouldn't be there. Just say "shortly after." (Later could mean years later, weeks later, hours later…)
  • "an anti-Imperial network" is not sufficient context for The Path. You should say that it was a network that sheltered Jedi.
  • I think Estree's contact at the spaceport is notable enough for a page.
  • You can't source this (an anti-Imperial network known as "the Path." The Path used a series of safehouses to smuggle real Force-sensitives, who were thus fugitives of the Empire, to the Outer Rim Territories) to the Force Awakens Beginner Game.
  • "but he wanted to make amends. He added that he got the family to safety" You should specify that this refers to Corran's mother and Corran.
  • In the end of the biography, you should say that Amidala was indeed brought to Alderaan. Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 11:10, 3 August 2022 (UTC)
  • Hunted shouldn't link to Order 66, but to the Great Jedi Purge, as the latter is an event, while the former is not. Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 11:11, 3 August 2022 (UTC)
    • think i got em all BloodOfIrizi Sabine Starbird (talk) 21:57, 6 August 2022 (UTC)
      • You did. I'll finish my review in a couple of days. Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 20:29, 22 August 2022 (UTC)
  • Kumail Nanjiani isn't linked or introduced as the person who portrays Haja Estree in prose.
  • "As a master of illusion,[13] he enlisted the help of Jayco who found potential clients and led them to his lair, using magnets and remotes to sell his fake Jedi scam" — I'm not sure how being a master of illusion connects with receiving help from Jayco? Samonic Signatureicon (Talk) 18:26, 24 October 2022 (UTC)
    • cannot believe i hadnt linked Kumail. fixed BloodOfIrizi Sabine Starbird (talk) 22:03, 24 October 2022 (UTC)
Braja Enthusiastree
  • Context for the Path in the intro and Jabiim and Alderaan in the body.
    • done
      • The context for those planets need the relevant referencing too.
        • fixed BloodOfIrizi (talk) 00:58, 17 July 2022 (UTC)
          • Still a bit faulty, Part III doesn't call Jabiim a world (Part V audio description does to my knowledge), the refs you put in attribute to entire sentences before that should be ref'd to episodes, and the Princess Leia Encyclopedia page doesn't call Alderaan a planet, just Leia's homeworld. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 14:23, 19 July 2022 (UTC)
  • Any reason hyperdrive is capitalised?
    • nope, the page was capitalized so i left it as is lol
  • The transitions between Haja's Part V & VI scenes are lacking any detail for the larger story context. I think you should summarise the battle that occurred while Haja was watching Leia in at least a sentence. As well as this, the article skips from the people boarding the transport to the Devastator chase, the departure from Jabiim should get covered too.
    • added, lmk if it needs more BloodOfIrizi (talk) 21:45, 15 July 2022 (UTC)
      • For the attack, it'd be good to mention how it ended, and also move the link to the first mention of it.
        For the escape, you should just say upfront that a decoy transport took off, which Vader took down, before their transport then escaped. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 09:11, 16 July 2022 (UTC)
        • does that work?
  • The P&T leans a lot on Part II and not on anything Haja says in Parts V & VI like his comment on the people being business opportunities. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 21:23, 15 July 2022 (UTC)
    • hows that?BloodOfIrizi (talk) 01:13, 16 July 2022 (UTC)
      • I'm not sure whether the Part V line should be interpreted as humorous or from a different perspective, given he was a conman. You could mention his line about being a liar and a fake Jedi in conjunction with his making amends bit. And also "showing where his loyalties lie" isn't the best wording since he was technically already loyal to the Path from what we can see in Parts II and III. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 14:23, 19 July 2022 (UTC)
  • The intro says "Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi", the bio says "former Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi". Can you make this consistent? Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 09:11, 16 July 2022 (UTC)
  • Part II does not call Corellia a planet.
  • "After Organa opened up the hangar bay doors, Estree dropped Kenobi's imagecaster while running to the transport, which was later found by the Third Sister." first two clauses are fine, but I think the last bit should go as a meanwhile after they flee Jabiim. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 14:23, 19 July 2022 (UTC)
  • The P&T has space for an image (and maybe a paragraph break as well, I'm on the fence on that part). I'd also like to recommend an image from Jedi's Return for the BtS as a production shot would be more beneficial than a character poster. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 18:08, 1 October 2022 (UTC)
Spooky
  • His species is not mentioned in the article body.
  • Misuse of punctuation on image captions.
  • Might be worth making a run through for general grammar; happy to copy-edit some out after a first pass is made, but I'm seeing a lot of unneeded commas.
  • While doing above run through, lessening the amount of specific dialogue prose recounting what Estree said might be in order, to more focus on his actions.
    • Done. Hopefully this article doesn't turn into Solha. :P Samonic Signatureicon (he/him) 18:39, 9 February 2023 (UTC)
  • Usage of {{KenobiDate should tie in the subject at hand.
  • Unsure if "former Jedi Master" is the most accurate context for Kenobi, given varying sources afterward from his point of view point to him viewing himself as simply a "Jedi-in-hiding"; perhaps consider swapping to that, as is similarly done on Padu Cherd.
  • Seems as if a location stub to link for the building Estree ran his business out of would be in order.
  • "Escape from Jabiim" section seems like it can fit another image.
    • I don't think another image is necessary. This is how it looks on my screen. Samonic Signatureicon (he/him) 18:52, 9 February 2023 (UTC)
  • Equipment seems to be missing information; doesn't mention clothes.
  • Seems like several of the context refs for planets (TFA game, ANH, Chandrila DB) can be merged into one pointing to USWNE.
  • Audio description cite per precedent should be formatted similar to how this article has it.
  • Rework gender/pronouns referencing per rules changes. Specifically, a lot of the Kenobi characters currently assume gender/pronouns based on appearance, which would need to be remedied for any characters that become unsourceable in this article's prose.—spookywillowwtalk 03:47, 8 February 2023 (UTC)
    • Part II establishes that Haja is a man. Samonic Signatureicon (he/him) 18:48, 9 February 2023 (UTC)
    • I went through the article and fixed the assumptions I found. Samonic Signatureicon (he/him) 14:23, 10 February 2023 (UTC)
Luca
  • "…Jayco and was watching the encounter from the edge of the room. Estree asked for a sum of 800 credits to locate…" I'm not sure how these two sentences connect. Did Kenobi ask him to locate the girl?
    • reworded, hows that?
  • While I usually like short paragraphs, I think it would be better to merge the 50-words paragraphs together where possible. For example, the last two under Meeting Kenobi.
    • combined
  • I believe that being able to use a blaster and being a master illusionist should go under "Skills and abilities" rather than P&T or Equipment.
    • Skills and abilities subsection added with relevant info
      • Sorry for the confusion: the fact that he owned a blaster can/should remain in Equipment regardless. LucaRoR Sigil of House Serenno (Talk) 13:35, 28 March 2023 (UTC)
        • ah, got it
  • (review note) Please, give a look at my copy-edit. LucaRoR Sigil of House Serenno (Talk) 09:36, 26 March 2023 (UTC)
  • His gender is missing from the body.
  • His eye color seems to be brown. LucaRoR Sigil of House Serenno (Talk) 13:35, 28 March 2023 (UTC)

Comments

  • Noting that I've taken over all of Ziara's nominations since he left the site. Samonic Signatureicon (he/him) 09:57, 5 February 2023 (UTC)

Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 00:25, 3 April 2023 (UTC)