- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Contents
Battle of Tiems
- Nominated by: Cavalier One
(Squadron channel) 11:28, October 31, 2012 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: The city of Tiems, on the planet of Tiems, in the Tiems system. The addresses for people living on the planet must be a nightmare.
(3 Inqs/4 Users/7 Total)
Support
IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 03:56, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
It is can be hug Tiems now plees. -- Darth Culator (Talk) 04:54, January 6, 2013 (UTC)- Awesomeness is debatable. Cade Calrayn
18:20, February 11, 2013 (UTC)
- Reminds me of a US Civil War article. Coruscantfan (Talk) 02:21, February 12, 2013 (UTC)
Good tiems! Menkooroo (talk) 02:45, February 12, 2013 (UTC)- Supreme Emperor (talk) 04:15, February 18, 2013 (UTC)
- My brain is fried.—Jedi Kasra ("Indeed.") 02:07, February 20, 2013 (UTC)
Object
Floyd
"the city of Tiems on the planet Tiems in the system of the same name of the Outer Rim Territories." Is this much info needed on the location? It kinda drags on. I think "city of Tiems on the Outer Rim planet of the same name" or something to that effect would be better. This goes for both the intro and Prelude.- I've cut down the intro as suggested, and rejigged the prelude section so that the mention of the city occurs later to avoid repetition.
Same thing goes for the location field in the infobox. As it currently stands, it is way too long. I don't think anything beyond the city and planet is really needed there.- Personally, I prefer it this way as it conveys information on the location of the battle in the wider context of the war. Also, I have been asking other battle noms to add the information as well. I would prefer to keep it as is for the sake of completeness if possible.
- Fair enough. IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 03:56, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Personally, I prefer it this way as it conveys information on the location of the battle in the wider context of the war. Also, I have been asking other battle noms to add the information as well. I would prefer to keep it as is for the sake of completeness if possible.
- Nice work. IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 01:36, December 25, 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review. - Cavalier One
(Squadron channel) 22:57, December 29, 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review. - Cavalier One
Valum-tiems
Is that image caption incomplete?- No. It shows the progression of the battle, with the key, as in a "key to diagram."
Does the Rebel Alliance Sourcebook include this battle in one of those nameless short story things WEG sometimes did, or should that be (First mentioned) rather than (First appearance) in the Sources section?- Its presented as the subject of a lecture given by Madine to new commanders. The battle never actual appears in an actual narrative section. Madine is dissecting the battle for his trainees.
If the infobox is listing several locations within locations, shouldn't it use the successive-asterisk method?- I've never done it as such, and have never seen it done that way at all. It would look messy. Also, all current FAs that list more specific locations in the infobox format it this way.
Should regiment be capitalized? The infobox does but the article proper doesn't.- Should only be capitalised when refering to an actual named regiment (1st Regiment, 2nd Regiment, etc). Decapped all instances when this doesn't apply.
The intro only uses Rebel Alliance while the rest of the article only uses Alliance to Restore the Republic. Can we get consistency across the board?- Changed intro.
In the Prelude section: "Having learned that several thousand Alliance to Restore the Republic personnel were being held in prisons[1] on the planet Tiems[3] in the system of the same name in the Outer Rim Territories' Belderone sector,[4] a mission was planned to liberate them." The grammar seems off here; it doesn't say who exactly learned that the prisoners were being held on Tiems or who planned the liberation mission.- Specified the Alliance planning the mission, however, no info is given on how they learned of the location. Could have been Alliance Intelligence, could have been local chat. Its never specified.
Can the article explicitly name the Alliance Army rather than pipelinking it? It's info that's in the infobox, and it seems important enough to be mentioned outright.- Specified
Ditto Galactic Empire, which is only pipelinked to Imperial. Seems important to namedrop them; I also think the Prelude section should, in the first sentence, explicitly name the Empire as the ones holding the Alliance troops captive. It's currently implied by the mention of Imperial forces a few sentences later, but I think it could be made more clear right off the bat.- Changed to Galactic Empire in the intro. Added "Imperial prisons" to first line of the prelude with pipelink to Galactic Empire for wording reasons. "Imperial prisons" is more correct that "Galactic Empire prisons".
- Can we still get an explicit namedrop of "Galactic Empire" somewhere in the article body? I do think it's important enough to outright state, and potentially confusing to leave out. Menkooroo (talk) 03:52, February 11, 2013 (UTC)
- Rejiggered some more. - Cavalier One
(Squadron channel) 18:39, February 11, 2013 (UTC)
- Rejiggered some more. - Cavalier One
- Can we still get an explicit namedrop of "Galactic Empire" somewhere in the article body? I do think it's important enough to outright state, and potentially confusing to leave out. Menkooroo (talk) 03:52, February 11, 2013 (UTC)
- Changed to Galactic Empire in the intro. Added "Imperial prisons" to first line of the prelude with pipelink to Galactic Empire for wording reasons. "Imperial prisons" is more correct that "Galactic Empire prisons".
I get what the BTS is saying about the system/city confusion, but I think it could be more clear by establishing just what the confusion was (ie the RAS only mentioning a city called Tiems and not a planet).- Hopefully clarified, including Jason Fry quotation on the subject.
Should the article include {{GCW Unknown 2}}?Menkooroo (talk) 14:04, February 10, 2013 (UTC)- Added. - Cavalier One
(Squadron channel) 18:05, February 10, 2013 (UTC)
- Added. - Cavalier One
Comments
Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 04:35, February 20, 2013 (UTC)