- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Battle of Koros Major
- Nominated by: IFYLOFD (You will pay the price for your lack of vision!) 05:27, November 29, 2009 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: 1,059 words. Not actually a whole lot of info about the battle at large, just about the Daragons.
(5 Inqs/1 Users/6 Total)
Support
About time ;)—Tommy 9281 00:51, March 5, 2010 (UTC)
Much improved, Floyd. Good work. — Fiolli {Alpheridies University ComNet} 04:31, March 8, 2010 (UTC)
Green Tentacle (Talk) 14:52, March 15, 2010 (UTC)
Please watch your linking. CC7567 (talk) 22:47, March 15, 2010 (UTC)- -- 1358 (Talk) 06:37, March 21, 2010 (UTC)
Cylka-talk- 23:22, March 25, 2010 (UTC)
Object
- Pasta bowl
No sources? See Kirrek, as well. There's information in The Essential Chronology, The New Essential Chronology, Jedi vs. Sith: The Essential Guide to the Force, The Complete Star Wars Encyclopedia, Tales of the Jedi Companion (I believe), and the Atlas. If you need help, let me know. These need to be listed as there is information there that is significant. — Fiolli {Alpheridies University ComNet} 02:20, January 26, 2010 (UTC)- Addressed.
- Blacklist:
"Without their commander, the Sith lost the battle." Who was the commander?- Addressed.
You state that Jori warned Teta about the "Sith threat." What prompted her to believe the Sith even posed such a threat?- Addressed.
Like with the Koros army, some sort of article needs to be created to reflect the armies of Naga Sadow.- Addressed.
I honestly think that the first part of the Prelude section should be rewritten to reflect more on the events that transpired immediately before the battle, as opposed telling about what led up to the entire Great Hyperspace War. There are too many broad statements given in its current state that would require you to provide context on much of what you have stated.- I disagree. The Battle of Koros Major was, along with the battle at Coruscant, the first battle in the war, and the initial invasion force came out of hyperspace above Koros Major. Therefore, I think that the prelude section should include the leadup to the invasion itself.
It can still be written on such a way that it doesn't seem like the prelude to the Great Hyperspace War.- Eh, all right. How should I go about this? Should I cut down the first paragraph and possibly merge them together?
This is currently your project, you'll need to figure it out.- Fixed.
- Eh, all right. How should I go about this? Should I cut down the first paragraph and possibly merge them together?
- I disagree. The Battle of Koros Major was, along with the battle at Coruscant, the first battle in the war, and the initial invasion force came out of hyperspace above Koros Major. Therefore, I think that the prelude section should include the leadup to the invasion itself.
Your underlinking knows no bounds.- Hopefully addressed.
I'd prefer a more situation-appropriate image for the prelude than the one you currently have of Teta.- Addressed.
- More to come.—Tommy9281
(Mechno-chair) 01:35, January 28, 2010 (UTC) No quotes at all? Not even a lead quote?- Bah bah bah bah bah. I totally forgot to add quotes. My bad. Added.
Why is Aarrba listed as a casualty? He didn't participate in the battle.- Moved to "Civilian casualties".
These two links have since become obsolete.- Addressed.
"Daragon returned to his flagship and abandoned the battlefield of Koros Major to confront Naga Sadow." Why did he want to confron Naga Sadow?- Addressed.
The beginning of the "Aftermath" section goes directly into Gav Daragon at apparent odds with Naga Sadow, but you give no context as to why or how this happened.—Tommy 9281
(Mechno-chair) 01:35, March 2, 2010 (UTC)- Clarified.
- Good job.—Tommy 9281 00:51, March 5, 2010 (UTC)
Double-pasta-checking: Is there anything in Crosscurrent or the Lost Tribe of the Sith series on this battle? They have information on other battles from that war. Please double check. — Fiolli {Alpheridies University ComNet} 15:09, February 19, 2010 (UTC)- Addressed.
- As I look through Crosscurrent I can't help but notice that this is not the same battle which Saes Rrogon's shipment of lignan ore was supposed to be delivered to.—Tommy 9281
(Mechno-chair) 23:20, February 28, 2010 (UTC)
- Really? I'll remove it then. I asked Tyber on IRC and he said that it was the battle in question. IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 00:12, March 5, 2010 (UTC)
- I'll go through it again, but I'm almost positive that Saes was supposed to meet Sadow at the Battle of Kirrek.—Tommy 9281 00:31, March 5, 2010 (UTC)
- If I may intervene, I just checked, and it's Kirrek. Jonjedigrandmaster
(We seed the stars) 00:32, March 5, 2010 (UTC)
- If I may intervene, I just checked, and it's Kirrek. Jonjedigrandmaster
- I'll go through it again, but I'm almost positive that Saes was supposed to meet Sadow at the Battle of Kirrek.—Tommy 9281 00:31, March 5, 2010 (UTC)
- Really? I'll remove it then. I asked Tyber on IRC and he said that it was the battle in question. IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 00:12, March 5, 2010 (UTC)
- As I look through Crosscurrent I can't help but notice that this is not the same battle which Saes Rrogon's shipment of lignan ore was supposed to be delivered to.—Tommy 9281
- Addressed.
- From the Chron-O-John of Green Tentacle:
You mention that the Daragons are Koros Major natives in the intro but it could do with being in the body somewhere. Otherwise the reference to the war ravaging Gav's home doesn't follow.- Addressed.
Prelude: "…a large part of the Sadow's force…" Doesn't make sense and you need context for Sadow. Green Tentacle (Talk) 20:43, March 8, 2010 (UTC)- Flurge. Addressed.
The only objection I have is that I would like to see first names used instead of the Daragon last name only, in some sections, since you speak of both Jori and Gav Daragon.Otherwise, good job. Cylka-talk- 20:24, March 23, 2010 (UTC)- Addressed.
Comments
- I've already had to make a decent amount of adjustments to this article concerning things that you, as its nominator, should have taken care of prior to its nomination. And there are still more that need to be made. If I end up having to make any more of the necessary changes myself, I'll also be claiming this article as one of my own.—Tommy 9281
(Mechno-chair) 04:57, February 18, 2010 (UTC)
Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 23:22, March 25, 2010 (UTC)