- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Alfonso Luiz Obota
- Nominated by: QuiGonJinn
(Talk) 11:54, October 22, 2009 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: This took long enough
(6 Inqs/2 Users/8 Total)
Support
My name is Alfonso Luiz Obota. You killed my father. Prepare to die. IFYLOFD (You will pay the price for your lack of vision!) 02:43, October 30, 2009 (UTC)- Jedi Kasra (comlink) 21:51, November 7, 2009 (UTC)
Excellent work, QGJ. A very polished read. Toprawa and Ralltiir 00:39, January 9, 2010 (UTC)- Kreivi Wolter 11:17, January 9, 2010 (UTC)
Cavalier One(Squadron channel) 10:14, January 22, 2010 (UTC)
CC7567 (talk) 02:34, January 25, 2010 (UTC)
It's rare for an article to require no tweaking whatsoever when I get to it. Very nice. -- Darth Culator (Talk) 19:59, January 25, 2010 (UTC)
Redundant vote. Green Tentacle (Talk) 20:24, January 25, 2010 (UTC)
Object
- A few minor, picky ones from the clone
The grammar of the sentence here implies that Katarn and Ors themselves were carrying proton torpedoes; either way, the wording is unclear, but as I'm not familiar with the subject material, please check it yourself. "The two, however, formulated a plan to infiltrate Ruusan as part of a crew of the Imperial transport High Hauler carrying a cargo of proton torpedoes."- Addressed.
"the High Hauler had been carrying the torpedoes to the planet Byss, but was caught in a battle with the Rebels, suffered heavy damage, and escaped to Ruusan": check your verb tense here; it's unclear whether these actions had supposedly already happened or not.- Better?
"Although the Imperials had initially wanted to destroy the High Hauler": the tense here implies that they wanted to destroy it before it had even arrived; please clarify. If so, then a little more context needs to be given.- Addressed.
- Very good otherwise. CC7567 (talk) 21:48, January 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks. QuiGonJinn
(Talk) 21:12, January 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks. QuiGonJinn
Comments
- I've noticed that I was missing a couple of potential articles to link to. Redlinks have been added and will be taken care of soon. QuiGonJinn
(Talk) 21:12, January 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Especially since one is in the intro and is not allowed per Rule 8, please fix it ASAP. I'm voting while trusting that you will do so in the next few days. CC7567 (talk) 02:34, January 25, 2010 (UTC)
- All done. QuiGonJinn
(Talk) 14:53, January 25, 2010 (UTC)
- All done. QuiGonJinn
- Especially since one is in the intro and is not allowed per Rule 8, please fix it ASAP. I'm voting while trusting that you will do so in the next few days. CC7567 (talk) 02:34, January 25, 2010 (UTC)
Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 19:59, January 25, 2010 (UTC)