Wookieepedia:Comprehensive article nominations/Unidentified Kilji vassal

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Comprehensive article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Unidentified Kilji vassal

  • Nominated by: — Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 07:51, 17 May 2022 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Sixth enlightened nomination related to the Kilji Illumine!
  • WookieeProject (optional): Novels

(3 ECs/1 Users/4 Total)

(Votes required: No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 10:43, 17 May 2022 (UTC)
  2. ECvote Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 00:14, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
  3. ECvote Fan26 (Talk) 15:51, 4 June 2022 (UTC)
  4. ECvote Imperators II(Talk) 10:24, 6 June 2022 (UTC)

Object

Brahassal
Fan
  • Kilji war cruiser should just be pipelinked through "war cruiser". The first sentence mentions the world Kilji too many times.
  • Context for "Jixtus"
  • The article body provides no explanation for why not having a master makes a vassal unable to take action.
  • Why is the bit about Nakirre's killer committing suicide pipelinked to Self-destruct mechanism? Jixtus isn't a droid I thought. Fan26 (Talk) 14:04, 24 May 2022 (UTC)
    • All done.— Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 15:04, 24 May 2022 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • There's no need for any titles to be mentioned in the infobox. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 17:18, 25 May 2022 (UTC)
    • Removed.— Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 07:07, 26 May 2022 (UTC)
Manoof
  • "formerly" needs to be removed from Nakirre in the masters field of the infobox. A few reasons for this, primarily we are documenting events that happened a long time ago, so technically both are former masters. There is also no "current" master, which is indicated by not having the same notation on Qilori.
    • Removed. Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 13:14, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
  • "Qilori announced that he was their new master and that he would lead them until they could be returned to their people." It isn't clear if this is singular use of them/they/their or if there were other individuals in similar situation, especially with the subsequent sentence and quote (is the vassal speaking on behalf of others or referring to themself as a plurality) Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:29, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
    • Cleaned up.Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 13:14, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
  • Following from the above, the second paragraph is rife with non-specific language such as they/their/his/himself. Can you rework it to make it clearer who/what the subject is in each instance if it isn't clear (eg did Nakirre's killer, being Jixtus, destroy his own warship or did he destroy Nakirre's warship?) Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:29, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
    • Fixed.Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 13:14, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
      • MUCH clearer thanks! Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 00:14, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
  • Is there a reason Category:Kilji vassals isn't a subcategory of Category:Kiljis? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:29, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
    • Not all Kilji vassals are Kiljis. (Also is this kind of comment considered an objection?) Samonic ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol 13:09, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
      • Typically no, but I had other objections and was editing the objections section so just included it here xD Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 00:14, 30 May 2022 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Comprehensive article by EduCorps 10:24, 6 June 2022 (UTC)