- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a comprehensive article nomination that was unsuccessful. Please do not modify it.
Smoking PSA
- Nominated by: Thunderforge (talk) 06:13, November 5, 2013 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: I don't think we have any real-world comprehensive articles, but I don't see any reason why we couldn't.
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Support
Object
- 501st
First of all, I think you need a Development section. This should contain its run time, when it was released, and its distributor. Currently, those are all intro or infobox exclusive. Additionally, I think it should be mentioned in this section that it had two different run times: the 1 min, and the 30 seconds.- Done. Let me know if you have ideas to further improve it. -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
- It would be better if Development came in between appearances and the synopsis.
- Done. -Thunderforge (talk) 19:20, November 17, 2013 (UTC)
- It would be better if Development came in between appearances and the synopsis.
- Done. Let me know if you have ideas to further improve it. -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
"...humans do and so they should set a good example." Sounds like humans should be setting an example, while it is the droids that are actually supposed to be doing so. Also, you should probably capitalize Human.- I've rephrased that sentence and capitalized Human throughout. -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
I believe context is needed for C-3PO and R2. Nowhere does it say they are droids.- The article now mentions that they are droids. Let me know if further context is needed. -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
- I think it necessary to give them context as droids in the synopsis as well as the intro.
- Added a thing saying that C-3PO is a droid. I waited until the second sentence to say R2-D2 is a droid in order to prevent it from sounding repetitive. -Thunderforge (talk) 19:20, November 17, 2013 (UTC)
- I think it necessary to give them context as droids in the synopsis as well as the intro.
- The article now mentions that they are droids. Let me know if further context is needed. -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
You list a spacestation as appearing in the commercial in the appearances section, but the Synopsis says nothing about this.- The synopsis now mentions the space station. For what it's worth, I didn't create that article and if someone thinks the location is something other than a spaceship (or wants to remove the article and link in the Appearances due to ambiguity), feel free to change it. -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
- On second thought, is there any proof that I'm missing that it is a spacestation? Because it could have happened anywhere really.
- It looks like the transcript calls it a space station. However, this is a fan-made transcript that isn't infallible (for instance, it incorrectly identifies the logo of the sponsoring organization). As far as I can tell, that's the only reference to it. Again, I didn't add it so if it ought to be deleted I'm totally fine with it. -Thunderforge (talk) 19:20, November 17, 2013 (UTC)
- Leave it as it is for now - going to create a TC for it to see community consensus.
- It looks like the transcript calls it a space station. However, this is a fan-made transcript that isn't infallible (for instance, it incorrectly identifies the logo of the sponsoring organization). As far as I can tell, that's the only reference to it. Again, I didn't add it so if it ought to be deleted I'm totally fine with it. -Thunderforge (talk) 19:20, November 17, 2013 (UTC)
- On second thought, is there any proof that I'm missing that it is a spacestation? Because it could have happened anywhere really.
- The synopsis now mentions the space station. For what it's worth, I didn't create that article and if someone thinks the location is something other than a spaceship (or wants to remove the article and link in the Appearances due to ambiguity), feel free to change it. -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
The infobox should be completely sourced. Ref 1 will probably work just fine there.- This I'm a little more confused about. Ref 1 only includes the year, it doesn't mention the distributor, runtime, or language. Surprisingly, I can't even find a third party source to say that it was distributed by the US Department of Health and Human Services, despite the unambiguous logo at the end (with text in the 30 second version). It seems to me like all of these things are sourced by the video itself. Am I misunderstanding your request? -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
- The infobox should be sourced, but not to 1 I guess. Instead, source it to itself, like here. The synopsis and the development should be sourced as well, with most likely all of it being sourced to itself again.
- Done. Thanks for providing an example! -Thunderforge (talk) 19:20, November 17, 2013 (UTC)
- The infobox should be sourced, but not to 1 I guess. Instead, source it to itself, like here. The synopsis and the development should be sourced as well, with most likely all of it being sourced to itself again.
- This I'm a little more confused about. Ref 1 only includes the year, it doesn't mention the distributor, runtime, or language. Surprisingly, I can't even find a third party source to say that it was distributed by the US Department of Health and Human Services, despite the unambiguous logo at the end (with text in the 30 second version). It seems to me like all of these things are sourced by the video itself. Am I misunderstanding your request? -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
Do you know if it ran throughout the 1980s? If so, that should be said somewhere.- I haven't been able to find anywhere when the commercial actually aired (and I never saw it myself). The only definitive thing I've found was the statement from TheStarWarsTrilogy.com saying it was in 1983. -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
- It looks like it will survive the TC. 501st dogma(talk) 22:09, November 8, 2013 (UTC)
- I presume that will have to be closed before this can be accepted. -Thunderforge (talk) 19:20, November 17, 2013 (UTC)
- It's over the limit word wise, so I'll continue my review until you have satisfied everything, then we can move it to the GAN page, and I'll support there. 501st dogma(talk) 22:53, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
- Looks like the revisions pushed it over. I'm happy to have it migrated over there. -Thunderforge (talk) 19:20, November 17, 2013 (UTC)
- Good work on the nomination. 501st dogma(talk) 00:30, November 14, 2013 (UTC)
Comments
- Searching to see if there's anything about this, and apparently this image from the PSA: EW Robots article Corellian Premier
The Force will be with you always 02:53, November 7, 2013 (UTC)
- Are you sure this is from the PSA? The console doesn't look much like the one C-3PO is at at the beginning or the one where the two droids meet at. -Thunderforge (talk) 05:14, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
- This already has a considerable size. You should consider taking it to the GANs board ;). Winterz (talk) 14:36, November 12, 2013 (UTC)
