- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a comprehensive article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Red (clone)
- Nominated by: Clone Commander Lee Talk 15:37, November 8, 2011 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: I hate Karen Traviss
(2 ECs/2 Users/4 Total)
Support
- --Cal Jedi
(Personal Comm Channel) 19:39, November 8, 2011 (UTC)
- Wait, we have to read the articles before we vote? NaruHina Talk
20:32, November 9, 2011 (UTC)
—Axinal Convocation Chamber 22:01, November 11, 2011 (UTC)
Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 16:22, December 4, 2011 (UTC)
Object
- We all hate her
You'll need to reload the infobox.- Done.
And there is some infobox-exclusive material.- Should be gone. Otherwise please say what, as I don't recognize anything missing.
- Cool stuff. Just mention that he's human and the years that he died. It's been a while since I read Order 66, but I'm pretty sure that you'll have to find a different source for the years of the war. Probably something like The New Essential Chronology would work.--Cal Jedi
(Personal Comm Channel) 15:57, November 8, 2011 (UTC)
- Done and no, Order 66 sources that. Clone Commander Lee Talk 18:33, November 8, 2011 (UTC)
- Ok. Cool beans.--Cal Jedi
(Personal Comm Channel) 19:39, November 8, 2011 (UTC)
- Ok. Cool beans.--Cal Jedi
- Done and no, Order 66 sources that. Clone Commander Lee Talk 18:33, November 8, 2011 (UTC)
- Cool stuff. Just mention that he's human and the years that he died. It's been a while since I read Order 66, but I'm pretty sure that you'll have to find a different source for the years of the war. Probably something like The New Essential Chronology would work.--Cal Jedi
- Should be gone. Otherwise please say what, as I don't recognize anything missing.
- Otherwise, good job.--Cal Jedi
(Personal Comm Channel) 15:45, November 8, 2011 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review. Clone Commander Lee Talk 15:52, November 8, 2011 (UTC)
- Jang
If he's a clone trooper, mentioning that he's a Human male is quite redundant here. And if he's a clone commando, it would be the same. I believe in this intro/bio paragrah, you can mention that he's was only a clone commando, and avoid mentioning the term clone trooper for consistency.- See above. Clone Commander Lee Talk 15:59, November 14, 2011 (UTC)
"However, Red was killed during the war—which raged between 22 and 19 BBY—and was later mourned, along with many other clone commandos who had been killed in action, by the Mandalorian training sergeants Kal Skirata and Walon Vau." I can see this sentence being separated into two sentences because as it stands it can be confusing. Mention that he died sometime during the war in one sentence, and then go ahead and say his death was mourned by ___. Also be sure to paraphrase your wording, Lee.- See above. Clone Commander Lee Talk 15:59, November 14, 2011 (UTC)
Is there any reason why you're mentioning his height in the can-approved intro? Creating a section wouldn't be too much for this. Also, for the nickname in the intro, his nickname is Red, not "Red" (notice the quotation marks). Keep the punctuation out of the wiki bold formatting. JangFett (Talk) 20:42, November 13, 2011 (UTC)- See above. Clone Commander Lee Talk 15:59, November 14, 2011 (UTC)
Comments