Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Umwak's nephew

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Umwak's nephew

  • Nominated by: ~ SavageBob 18:04, November 7, 2010 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: More characters, you say! Well, you asked for it. ;)

(4 ACs/1 Users/5 Total)

Support

  1. ACvote Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:10, November 15, 2010 (UTC)
  2. ACvote Excellent article, silly story. :P 1358 (Talk) 22:02, November 27, 2010 (UTC)
  3. Inqvote --Eyrezer 20:47, December 3, 2010 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 03:37, December 8, 2010 (UTC)
  5. 'Tis no silly! (: –Tm_T (Talk) 16:07, December 8, 2010 (UTC)

Object

Xd1358
  • Quick glance:
    • The intro's bolding of Umwak's nephew makes it look like it is a not-conjectural name. Perhaps "This male Dulok was the nephew of Umwak" would be better?
      • Try reading the first sentence again. ;-) 1358 (Talk) 20:28, November 7, 2010 (UTC)
    • The bio does not make it very clear that this individual is Umwak's nephew. :P
    • Moar later! 1358 (Talk) 18:37, November 7, 2010 (UTC)
      • Done! Moar? ~ SavageBob 20:25, November 7, 2010 (UTC)
        • Moar tomorrow, I guess! 1358 (Talk) 20:28, November 7, 2010 (UTC)
  • Something needs to be bolded in the intro. 1358 (Talk) 10:33, November 13, 2010 (UTC)
Toprawa
  • My objection concerns the final few sentences of the intro, which I feel are lacking a bit in overall context and detail, and make it a bit difficult to understand what's happening exactly. The bio does well to explain how the Duloks become trapped in the net, why they're warning the King, and why the Duloks are then retreating for the swamp--because of the Ewoks' actions. But the intro doesn't really explain the Ewoks' involvement in this, and so the references are lost on me, for one: "Eventually, the youngster and his uncle became entangled in a ganga-sap net they had carried into the Arbo Maze, a thick copse of trees. Undeterred, they hobbled to the Tree of Light to warn Gorneesh. Nevertheless, they arrived to find that the Ewoks had already renewed the tree—and the Duloks were fleeing back to their swamp." Toprawa and Ralltiir 06:38, November 14, 2010 (UTC)
    • OK, thanks for the review. How does the intro look now? ~ SavageBob 18:25, November 14, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 16:10, December 8, 2010 (UTC)