Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Sy Myrthian Insurrection

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Sy Myrthian Insurrection

  • Nominated by: 501st dogma(talk) 12:13, July 20, 2012 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:

(4 ACs/2 Users/6 Total)

Support

  1. ACvote Cavalier OneFarStar(Squadron channel) 09:20, July 26, 2012 (UTC)
  2. Exiled Jedi Oldrepublic crest (Greetings) 23:45, August 8, 2012 (UTC)
  3. ACvote CC7567 (talk) 21:59, August 11, 2012 (UTC)
  4. ACvote Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 22:50, August 11, 2012 (UTC)
  5. —Jedi Kasra ("Indeed.") 20:08, August 12, 2012 (UTC)
  6. ACvote 1358 (Talk) 22:10, August 12, 2012 (UTC)

Object

Cav
  • The Sy Myrthian Insurrection was a campaign launched by the Galactic Empire in 19 BBY during the Imperial Period's Reconquest of the Rim, to drive out the holdout forces of the Confederacy of Independent Systems lead by Sy Myrthian ex-Senator Toonbuck Toora from the region around the planet Sy Myrth during the Imperial's Reconquest of the Rim following the Clone Wars. This is one, long, run on sentence. Please break it up. Also, you mention the Reconquest of the Rim twice. I have noticed that you tend to create these long sentences very often in your articles; please start looking to actively search for these run-on sentences during your editing process. - Cavalier OneFarStar(Squadron channel) 20:41, July 22, 2012 (UTC)
    • Fixed. I think it was just a bunch of double mentioning that made it long. In addition to the double reconquest, I had two Clone Wars (one was in the sentence immediately after). Thanks for poininting that out and for the review, 501st dogma(talk) 12:32, July 23, 2012 (UTC)
Exiled Jedi
  • I know this is a bit picky, but didn't the Galactic Republic become the Galactic Empire before the Clone Wars ended? Please correct me if I'm wrong.
    • Yes, but how does that relate to the article? I do say that the Republic beat the Seppies, but that's true because the Republic did all the fighting, save for the last lil bit.
  • Please make it clearer that the insurrection took place in 19 BBY in the body.
    • Done.
  • Are the battles of Diado and Metalorn not major battles that should be mentioned in the infobox?
    • Done.
  • By reactivating a factory world, I assume you mean putting it back to producing? Could you make this a little clearer.
  • Any further information on the factory world? Seems strange that the Empire didn't try and take it back.--Exiled Jedi Oldrepublic crest (Greetings) 18:42, August 8, 2012 (UTC)
    • Someone changed it to a single factory world while I was away, while it was actualy multiple ones. Fixed the problem, though there's no info on the factory worlds' capture. Thanks for the review, 501st dogma(talk) 18:56, August 8, 2012 (UTC)
      • Probably Diado and Metalorn were intended to be the factory worlds reactivated, since they were factory worlds in other sources, but it doesn't say, so there is not much that can be done.--Exiled Jedi Oldrepublic crest (Greetings) 23:45, August 8, 2012 (UTC)
Attack of the Clone
  • Any casualties that can be specified in the infobox? Toora would be one, it appears.
    • Done.
  • The intro begins with stating that "The Sy Myrthian Insurrection was a campaign launched by the Galactic Empire." However, if it's titled the Sy Mrtyhian Insurrection, wouldn't it be Toora who waged the campaign? Even if Toora didn't make the first move, something needs to be reworded; the Empire didn't wage an "Insurrection," it only responded to it. Please clarify.
    • Better?
  • In accordance with the Battle LG, "The insurrection" would be a more appropriate section name than "The campaign."
    • Done.
  • Given that Sy Myrth and Toora were among the founders of the Confederacy, it sounds like it would be worth mentioning that somewhere in the Prelude to further exemplify Toora's stubbornness to the Separatist cause. The info can even come from Warfare if it's there.
    • Fixed.
  • Was the Battle of Trasemene at Trasemene, or simply in the system? The intro favors the latter, while the body says the former. Ideally, even if it was both at the planet and in the system, consistency should be exercised.
    • Fixed. 501st dogma(talk) 15:49, August 11, 2012 (UTC)
  • Is "Insurrection" ever capitalized on its own in Warfare? I would hesitate to capitalize it on its own without the official text referring to it that way. Also, there are some inconsistencies with the capitalization, so whatever you decide, please check throughout the article.
    • It's capitalized on the map of the Reconquest of the Rim, so I'll leave it as it is. I've fixed the capitalization problems.
  • In the future, please note that images should not be resized beyond their native format. CC7567 (talk) 01:09, August 11, 2012 (UTC)
    • Acknowledged. Thanks for the review. 501st dogma(talk) 15:49, August 11, 2012 (UTC)
Ecks Dee
  • "However, some Confederates continued to fight on as the Separatist holdouts at the beginning of the Imperial Period, including one of the Confederacy's founders, Sy Myrthian ex-Senator Toonbuck Toora, who managed to reactivate Separatist ground and naval forces, as well as restart production in Confederate factory worlds, after they had been deactivated at the end of the Clone Wars in the vicinity of Toora's homeworld of Sy Myrth." Please split this huge sentence. 1358 (Talk) 11:56, August 12, 2012 (UTC)
    • Done. Thanks for looking it over. 501st dogma(talk) 12:58, August 12, 2012 (UTC)


Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 22:10, August 12, 2012 (UTC)