Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Senator Sneakaway

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Senator Sneakaway

  • Nominated by: 501st dogma(talk) 00:56, January 12, 2015 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: The Senator Decamp mentioned in the bio quote could be either of the Senators, as it was a nickname the Phindian just made up for one of them--unfortunately, we don't know which of them she's referring to.

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)

Support

  1. Ayrehead02 (talk) 10:26, January 15, 2015 (UTC)
  2. ACvote IFYLOFD (Talk) 03:51, January 26, 2015 (UTC)
  3. Manoof (talk) 05:56, February 10, 2015 (UTC)
  4. ACvote Winterz (talk) 23:22, March 4, 2015 (UTC)
  5. ACvote Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 14:52, March 6, 2015 (UTC)

Object

Ayrehead
  • I think a picture of the Battle of Coruscant might be more relevant than the Phindian picture, since it isn't clear at the moment that the Phindian pictured isn't the captain. Ayrehead02 (talk) 15:07, January 12, 2015 (UTC)
    • I've tweaked the description of the image. It should be clear now that the Phindian pictured isn't the captain.
  • Is the Alamania a Republic ship? If so you should say that when you mention it. Ayrehead02 (talk) 15:07, January 12, 2015 (UTC)
    • Clarified.
  • Should the last sentence of the first paragraph of the bio be split? It seems a bit odd at the moment. Ayrehead02 (talk) 15:07, January 12, 2015 (UTC)
    • What do you mean split? If you're referring to the semi colon, it should be fine as it is, as the semi colon sentence relates to the one before it. 501st dogma(talk) 15:24, January 12, 2015 (UTC)
Manoof
  • Second sentence of the bio still looks a bit odd. Maybe combine the first part with the previous sentence, something like "...a male Human was serving as a Senator in the New Republic's Senate when the invaders overran the New Republic capital planet of Coruscant. Seeking to escape the Vong, the Senator and other members of the Senate commandeered the New Republic warship Alamania, leaving some of the Senator's friends to perish on Coruscant during the battle."
    • I've axed the semi-colon, happy? :P
      • Lol ok
  • Maybe split the first sentence of the PT, the two events happened in separate years, but having them in the same sentence gives the impression they happened maybe days apart.
    • Eh, I use "later," so it should be good. Also, it's not the first time I mention those events, so the audience should know that the pair of events don't happen one after another.
      • For some reason I read it now and it's ok...
  • Is there any indication of his reaction after the confrontation, when the captain let him loose? Manoof (talk) 02:33, February 10, 2015 (UTC)
    • Nope, they just scurry away. I've added that they left hurriedly though. Thanks for the review. 501st dogma(talk) 03:05, February 10, 2015 (UTC)
      • Boom! Manoof (talk) 05:56, February 10, 2015 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 14:52, March 6, 2015 (UTC)