Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Scepter of Ragnos

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Scepter of Ragnos

  • Nominated by: Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 01:58, August 11, 2011 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:Here we go. My first GAnom for the Barn-burner and my first GAnom for WP:VG.

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)

Support

  1. Good work.--Talrrivanian JaingHead (Headquarters) 06:58, August 20, 2011 (UTC)
  2. ACvote Well done. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 14:54, October 8, 2011 (UTC)
  3. ACvote CC7567 (talk) 20:53, October 8, 2011 (UTC)
  4. ACvote grunny@wookieepedia:~$ 02:01, October 10, 2011 (UTC)
  5. Now it's going to be 8 noms on this page :D JangFett (Talk) 04:43, October 11, 2011 (UTC)

Object

Prepare to be savaged…
  • You can go into much greater detail about how it looks, based on the image: The spikes at the top are not just spikes, they're part of an elaborate crest, for instance. I also note a striated handle, a double pommel guard (with the inside guard shorter than the outside one), a striated tip, a fuller in the center, and an overall slate and silver coloration. ~SavageBOB sig 14:18, August 11, 2011 (UTC)
    • See how that looks. Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 22:17, August 11, 2011 (UTC)
      • Better. But I'm not sure what you mean by the colors. Parts of it look slate-gray, other parts look silver. ~SavageBOB sig 00:20, August 12, 2011 (UTC)
        • I tried to describe the colors as best I could. Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 03:12, August 12, 2011 (UTC)
          • I think a lot of what you were seeing was simply lighting effects on metal. I've tried to reword things a bit, but take a look. (Note I'll be traveling tomorrow, and won't be able to check the nom again for a few days. AC folks: I am no longer an oppose! :) ~SavageBOB sig 04:12, August 12, 2011 (UTC)
The Premier
  1. The BTS section needs a little expansion and context. What do you mean by "trapped" and "blasted" in the second-to-last sentence? Corellian PremierRobotechAll along the watchtower 14:42, August 12, 2011 (UTC)
    • Hmm, not sure what you want here. It seems pretty clear to me. But, see how this works. Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 15:33, August 12, 2011 (UTC)
  2. I'm guessing there is information about the scepter in the game's guide. There is a Senate Hall page where you can request information.
Talrrivanian
  • First of all the Description section cannot be sourced to just the one reference. At least three more are needed.
    • I got it all from the one source I have on there.
  • In the History section you need to source several facts. For instance, how do we know that the info about Axmis creating the cult thing is not some made-up joke?
  • In the History section, at the beginning you need to ref 14 ABY, and the sentence it is located in.
    • I got that info from the game, too.
  • You need to ref the sentence in the history section that states that the scepter can reanimate cells.
  • Ref this sentence also: Tavion used this ability to create an army of Force-sensitives from the ranks of the Disciples of Ragnos, mainly the Sith Cultists. It is located in the History section.
  • Maybe more later. --Talrrivanian JaingHead (Headquarters) 17:08, August 19, 2011 (UTC)
This giant woman will devour us all!
  • A few prelims: The name "Scepter of Ragnos" and the description of it as an "artifact" don't appear anywhere in the "Characteristics" or "History" sections. Always remember that the introduction is an abstract of the rest of the article, and that anything stated in the intro needs to be stated in the body, too.
    • Got it.
  • The intro states that it once belonged to Marka Ragnos --- if that's true, then the "History" section should begin during Ragnos's life and state that he owned it before his death.
    • Fixed. Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 01:32, August 29, 2011 (UTC)
      • Sorry for the late reply on this one. A little bit more detail on Ragnos's life would probably be a good idea rather than a quick one-sentence get-it-over-with kinda thing. When did he live? When did he die (you can say that the weapon was definitely created before this year)? For chronological purposes, you should also probably indicate that it found its way to a collector on Commenor before you start talking about Tavion Axmis. Menkooroo 04:02, September 15, 2011 (UTC)
        • I'll try to get to the other stuff as soon as I can, but the part about Ragnos I'm not too sure about. I don't mind adding more detail into Ragnos' life part. You'll probably call me paranoid, but I'm not sure that we can say that Ragnos created it before his death. It's highly possible that he created it while he was a spirit, and that's why it was so powerful. Thoughts? Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 23:15, September 16, 2011 (UTC)
          • That's a good point. Maybe best to mention Ragnos's life without assuming when he created it, then. Something like "created by Marka Ragnos, a Sith Lord of the Sith Empire who lived until 5000 BBY..." Menkooroo 04:29, September 18, 2011 (UTC)
  • There's a lot of info in "History" that should really be in "Characteristics:" the stuff about reanimating cells, resurrecting spirits, and granting Force-sensitivity to muggles. Menkooroo 05:21, August 28, 2011 (UTC)
Jujiggum
  • Just from reading the article, I can tell the infobox is incomplete.
    • I filled in the empty spots as best as I could, but I'm not sure what belongs in certain sections, such as "Culture", "Heritage", etc.--Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 00:41, October 1, 2011 (UTC)
      • From what I've seen, the "culture" field specifies a certain culture, and the "heritage" field is used to specify something broader like a race. Mind prison is a good example. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 14:44, October 1, 2011 (UTC)
  • "She and the cult were stopped, however, when Jedi Knight Jaden Korr destroyed the scepter and Axmis was destroyed along with it." Please find a better way to the word the last part of this sentence. I'd have fixed it myself, but I didn't know whether or not Axmis was destroyed by Korr or by the scepter's destruction itself, and I didn't want to accidentally infer the wrong one.
    • Fixed.
  • You have information exlusive to the intro.
  • First sentence of the Characteristics section is also very poorly worded.
  • Second paragraph of the Characteristics section: "energy" is overused.
  • "The scepter was said to hold the power to infuse a dead body with enough Force energy to reanimate the corpse's cells." Said by whom? (This applies to the body as well)
  • In the intro, you say that the scepter had the power to make "ordinary" people Force-sensitive; but in the body, you say it only has the power to make certain people Force-sensitive. Is there some kind of constraint on this power? Can it not make 'anybody Force-sensitive—only certain people?
  • "Hidden inside the scepter's handle lay a metallic Sith sword of Sith Lord Marka Ragnos." Do you mean "lay Ragnos' sith sword."? Also, is the "metallic" necessary? Weren't all Sith swords metallic?
  • Link for the collector? (Also, you say "him" for the collector—do we know for certain that the collector was male?
  • "14 ABY, Tavion Axmis, a Dark Jedi and leader of the Disciples of Ragnos…" Was he a leader of the Disciples (as in one of several), or the leader?
    • Done.
  • Your context for the Disciples is basically identical for the intro and body; can you adjust one? (Also, I removed the context for Ragnos from each—in both instances, Ragnos had been introduced and mentioned quite recently, so I found the context a bit awkward and unnecessary.)
  • "The scepter was said to hold the power to infuse a dead body with enough Force energy to reanimate the corpse's cells." This description is identical in the Characteristics and History. (I added mention of the corpse so as to make the statement more clear.) Also, quick question regarding this—would a link to zombie be apropriate here? It is reanimation of the dead…
  • "However, the effect was not permanent and would end immediately with the destruction of the scepter." The "would" here makes this a conditional mood, which actually changes the tense, unless you don't meant to indicate that that's what eventually happened. If you were just stating that as a fact, then you need to say something more along the lines of: "The effect was not permanent; if the scepter was ever destroyed, the beings would lose their animation."
    • Fixed.
  • Remember to use last names only—not first—after you introduce a character.
  • "…including the moon Yavin 4. She also used it…" The "She" here is very sudden. Until now, you haven't mentioned anybody's sex, so the reader is a bit taken aback.
  • How do the words "such as" link to the mission to Vjun? Surely there can be a better place to pipelink it. Also, how specifically did she use the scepeter there?
  • "…she summoned the Sith Lord's spirit who immediately took control of Axmis' body." Grammar. Also, should "spirit" be linked to Force ghost?
    • I believe I got it.--Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 03:01, October 1, 2011 (UTC)
      • One quick question here: the order of events here seem to contradict the order you've put down. I just want to double-check: which is correct? Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 14:44, October 1, 2011 (UTC)
        • I didn't explain that very good. Fixed.--Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 01:35, October 2, 2011 (UTC)
          • One more quick question on this: were there two separate duels against Axmis, then? One against just Axmis, and the second against the Ragnos-possessed Axmis? Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 03:31, October 2, 2011 (UTC)
  • In the image in the History section, you say that Axmis has drawn the Sith sword out of the scepter. You never mention anywhere in the article that this is possible; you just say that the sword was hidden within it. (In fact, uppon reading what you put in the Characteristics section about the sword, I assumed that the scepter had been built about the sword, and that the two were inseparable.)
  • Throughout the article you use a lower-case "s" for sceptor. Shouldn't you use an upper-case "S" due to its title?
    • Sounds right.
  • Should you not use the {{gamemechanics}} template in the article?
  • As a note: remember that "it's" is a contraction for the term "it is"; the possessive term "its" (as in, something that belongs to "it") does not use an apostrophe. Also remember that you should not use the term "this" in IU-portions of articles—"this" is technically a present-tense term. And just one more thing: make sure to link things once upon their first mention; some of the linking was a bit erratic.
  • This is the first time I've had time for a review in quite a long while. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 22:26, September 30, 2011 (UTC)
Grunny
  • Quick question: In the quote for the characteristics section, is "Dark side" actually in the game with a capital D? "like it's Dark side aura was gone." Just seems a bit strange, so wanted to check it was capitalized like that in the subtitles or wherever the line is written? Also, I'm assuming the "it's" should be "its", otherwise it needs a [sic].
  • The last sentence of the first paragraph of the history section doesn't seem to fit where it is: "However, the effect was not permanent; if the Scepter was ever destroyed, the beings would lose their animation." With the word "animation", it appears to refer only to the part about bringing a dead body back to life b animating their cells, but it comes after the description of it being able to give beings Force sensitivity. I think it should either be moved to after the sentence about bringing dead bodies back to life, or mention that beings that were infused with Force powers also lost their abilities so that it fits where it is.
  • Great job :). grunny@wookieepedia:~$ 08:11, October 9, 2011 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 05:49, October 11, 2011 (UTC)


  1. Just remember to keep an eye on the links; i added several I felt were appropriate. As a reminder, things are linked once in the intro, once in the infobox, and once in the body. Corellian PremierRobotechAll along the watchtower 14:54, August 12, 2011 (UTC)
  2. Sorry to butt in, but I don't think the gamemechanics tag is needed, and here's why. The tag is for alternate scenarios, and the only way to proceed is to destroy the scepter-which happens in a cutscene. And if memory serves, except for Byss, the other uses of the scepter happen in cutscenes or during the critical paths (Yavin, Vjun, Korriban). Corellian PremierRobotechAll along the watchtower 15:42, October 1, 2011 (UTC)
    • Perhaps the Scepter itself was used/destroyed in the same fashion on both the light and dark side paths, but that doesn't mean that the rest of the events mentioned in the article happened the same exact way on both paths. I haven't played the game, however, so I can't say for certain that it's necessary, which is why I stated the objection as a question. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 16:07, October 1, 2011 (UTC)
      • Actually, if you choose the dark side, you go to Korriban and kill Axmis, then fight Katarn. Katarn survives, but you take the Scepter and use it to your own end. All of this is mentioned in the BTS. So, I think that the tag should be left. The only reason that I said that I'm not sure that it should be kept is that the light side is confirmed canon.--Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 01:49, October 2, 2011 (UTC)

Vote to remove nomination (AC only)

ACvote Either the current objections haven't yet been addressed properly or haven't been properly checked. In any case, one objection is nearing three weeks of inactivity. CC7567 (talk) 03:08, September 5, 2011 (UTC)
  • My apologies. I believe that the objection you refer to is the one about the Prima Guide. I have been looking for someone that has it. I finally found out that Jaymach has it, but he hasn't given me the information yet. If you could give me a little more time to ask him again, I'd appreciate it. Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 15:58, September 5, 2011 (UTC)