Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Permafrost crystal/Legends

< Wookieepedia:Good article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Permafrost crystal

  • Nominated by: OLIOSTER (talk) 10:34, April 7, 2011 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Per the new CAN rule #14, this article easily went over 250 words after adding an intro and splitting the information up.

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)

Support

  1. Kilson Likes PIE(The Bakery) 19:41, April 9, 2011 (UTC)
  2. ACvote They're beautiful.—Tommy 9281 Sunday, April 10, 2011, 13:56 UTC
  3. Permasupport! ~SavageBOB sig 21:46, April 10, 2011 (UTC)
  4. ACvote Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:48, April 12, 2011 (UTC)
  5. ACvote 1358 (Talk) 20:42, April 13, 2011 (UTC)

Object

Return of the PIE
  • You mention Aurilia is on Dathomir in the intro, but not in the History section.
  • In the Properties section, you say "used in a lightsaber" or something very similar three times. Please try to vary the word choice.
  • In the Bts, you mention the two factions in the Battle of Hoth. You should probably move this info to the History section or put it in both sections.
    • Considering how it plays out in the game, suggestions would be appreciated. OLIOSTER (talk) 08:04, April 8, 2011 (UTC)
      • It sounds good now.
  • Is there any reason why the town of Aurilia gave away the crystal for the player fighting at Hoth? If so, put it in the History section.
    • This was a compromise due to the player choosing a side and then buying the crystal from their side's Hoth quartermaster. Any suggestions would be welcome. OLIOSTER (talk) 08:04, April 8, 2011 (UTC)
      • Eh, when you put it that way, you probably worded it the best anyone could. One thing, you likely should mention that a quartermaster gives the spacer the crystal in the History section. Kilson Likes PIE(The Bakery) 22:48, April 8, 2011 (UTC)
  • Besides those, nice job. Good to see another SWG nom. Kilson Likes PIE(The Bakery) 21:14, April 7, 2011 (UTC)
Prepare to be savaged…
  • "When one of the crystals was tuned by a Force-sensitive for use in a lightsaber, it became a focusing crystal and could only be utilized by that individual in their lightsaber." I'm confused by the "only" here. Do you mean that once attuned, only the person who owns the lightsaber can use the crystal? Or do you mean that once attuned, the permafrost crystal is the only crystal that can be used in that lightsaber (and thus they can't add another later)? Or that once attuned, the permafrost crystal can only be used in that lightsaber and no other? Or that once attuned, the crystal could only be used for lightsabers and for no other purpose?
    • Meant that the individual who tuned the crystal was the only person who could use it in their lightsaber(s). Made this more clear. OLIOSTER (talk) 18:18, April 10, 2011 (UTC)
  • There are too many nested clauses in the third-to-last sentence of BTS. Would it be possible to break these up? ~SavageBOB sig 17:03, April 10, 2011 (UTC)
  • Looking good. Can you elaborate on the BTS about the time of the Battle of Hoth? Rather than saying only that the game's timeline is not move up, perhaps also say when the Battle of Hoth canonically takes place, with an appropriate reference. ~SavageBOB sig 20:59, April 10, 2011 (UTC)
    • Alright. Used Battle of Hoth's reference to the Essential Atlas for the year. OLIOSTER (talk) 21:04, April 10, 2011 (UTC)
      • [Edit conflict] Nah, because no dates are actually mentioned in the film. You could go with 3 ABY, The New Essential Chronology, p. 118, though. ~SavageBOB sig 21:16, April 10, 2011 (UTC)
      • The Atlas actually doesn't use ABY/BBY dating, so it'd be better to use the Chronology I think. ~SavageBOB sig 21:17, April 10, 2011 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 16:23, April 14, 2011 (UTC)