- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Padawan birthday ritual
- Nominated by: —MJ— Council Chambers 06:46, November 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: 702 words, and far more complicated than I expected when I started it. This is my first attempt at a GA in nearly three years, so there may be some rust in my work.
(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
Support
- Looks good to me.--Exiled Jedi
(Greetings) 18:31, December 13, 2012 (UTC) - Keep the articles coming, Jon.—Jedi Kasra ("Indeed.") 01:40, December 20, 2012 (UTC)
IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 01:32, December 26, 2012 (UTC)- grunny@wookieepedia:~$ 17:23, December 29, 2012 (UTC)
Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 02:00, December 31, 2012 (UTC)
Object
Toprawa
This is technically a dangling modifier. Please revise. I can explain further if need be. "Practiced by Padawans on their thirteenth birthday, they would quietly reflect..."Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 23:07, December 29, 2012 (UTC)- Is this better? —MJ— Comlink 23:40, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Well, the dangling modifier in that sentence is the introductory sentence clause, "Practiced on their thirteenth birthday..." What that is intending to refer to is the ritual. But when the beginning of the next sentence clause starts with the word "Padawan," what that's literally saying is that "Padawans were practiced on the Padawans' thirteenth birthday," instead of "the ritual was practiced on the Padawans' thirteenth birthday." An example of how I might personally reword this sentence is "Padawans, practicing the ritual on their thirteenth birthday, would quietly reflect on the past..." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 23:50, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Try this. —MJ— Training Room 00:01, December 31, 2012 (UTC)
- Perfect. Thanks. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 02:00, December 31, 2012 (UTC)
- Try this. —MJ— Training Room 00:01, December 31, 2012 (UTC)
- Well, the dangling modifier in that sentence is the introductory sentence clause, "Practiced on their thirteenth birthday..." What that is intending to refer to is the ritual. But when the beginning of the next sentence clause starts with the word "Padawan," what that's literally saying is that "Padawans were practiced on the Padawans' thirteenth birthday," instead of "the ritual was practiced on the Padawans' thirteenth birthday." An example of how I might personally reword this sentence is "Padawans, practicing the ritual on their thirteenth birthday, would quietly reflect on the past..." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 23:50, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Is this better? —MJ— Comlink 23:40, December 30, 2012 (UTC)
Comments
Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 02:00, December 31, 2012 (UTC)
I've done something a little non-standard in the infobox by using the abbreviation "fl." See the linked Wikipedia article for what it means. I've done this because the event infobox normally takes a precise date and thus has no field for era, so there would otherwise be absolutely no indication of when this ritual was actually practiced in the infobox. I know we normally do not link to Wikipedia outside of BTS sections, but due to the fact that "fl." is not very well known, I provided the link so people know what it means. I'm willing to remove this line if there are objections, but I would prefer that the infobox contain some indication of when this ritual was used. —MJ— Council Chambers 06:46, November 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Wouldn't "c." work just as well? I've seen many articles on Wookieepedia use "c." It's the more "standardized" version, and more people understand its meaning. Also, we then wouldn't have to link to Wikipedia, and the infobox wouldn't have to be unlike other infoboxes. Oh, before I dive in to my review, the infobox needs to be sourced. ;) —Cal Jedi (Personal Comm Channel) 16:52, November 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Duh. Infobox is now sourced. As to "c.", that would imply that the the dates given were actually approximate dates of when the practice was first and last used, when we haven't the slightest clue when this practice began or ended. It could date all the way back to the Ruusan Reformations for all we know. "fl." avoids that implication by just saying that "we know it existed at least between these dates" while leaving open the possibility of it existing long before or after those dates. —MJ— Jedi Council Chambers 18:07, November 30, 2012 (UTC)
