Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Maddie Macatten

< Wookieepedia:Good article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Maddie Macatten

(3 ACs/4 Users/7 Total)

Support

  1. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 18:15, 12 June 2009 (UTC)
  2. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 21:25, 12 June 2009 (UTC)
  3. Jonjedigrandmaster (Jujiggum) 21:48, 12 June 2009 (UTC)
  4. SoresuMakashi(Everything I tell you is the truth) 02:09, 13 June 2009 (UTC)
  5. ACvote CC7567 (talk) 20:17, 13 June 2009 (UTC)
  6. ACvote "Although she had a lot of information to share, most of it was wrong." Chack Jadson (Talk) 13:46, 23 June 2009 (UTC)
  7. ACvote Grunny (Talk) 14:07, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Object

  1. Farl's here to… What was it? Babble babble… It has something to do with that thing… The Darksomething thing… Dark Vader?… Ah, no. Maddie Macatten GAN. That was it.
    • "…found herself free. Taking the ownership papers to one of her master's ships, the Gymsnor-2 light freighter Scupper Bantoo, she flew the vessel out of its docking bay. Free, Macatten…" The word free is used twice in a quick succession. Can you remove or change one of the occurrences?
      • Done.
    • "Personality and traits" compresses several, unrelated manners in one paragraph (Speech patterns, tendency to sing while working and goal in life). I think each of those should have its own paragraph; currently, I find the section confusingly crowded.
      • I split it into two paragraphs. Breaking it down anymore would result in single sentences.
    • What was I saying?… Oh yeah! That's all. -Skippy Farlstendoiro 14:12, 10 June 2009 (UTC)
  2. From the Council Chambers:
    • "Maddie Macatten was a female Bith who was considered to be aged by 8 ABY.": "Aged" is a bit unclear.
      • Aged. As in "old". Changed to be clearer.
    • Behind the scenes: Should "gamemaster" be capitalized? The WOTC RPG books consistently capitalize "Gamemaster" when it's spelled out, but I don't know if the WEG books do the same.
      • Capitalized for consistency.
    • Otherwise, good job. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 18:44, 11 June 2009 (UTC)
  3. The Grand Master
    • Bio: Is there really any point to starting a sentence with "Free", after you say that she has been released from her servitude? This seems redundant.
      • Reworked.
    • Bio: "Macatten made several modifications to the Scupper Bantoo, but it was an old vessel and could only take so much modification." This is pretty awkwawrd. Could it be reworded, so that one of the "modification"s could be removed?
      • Done.
    • The last sentence of the bio seems sudden and completely out of place. Is there any way it could be worked in earlier, when you begin talking about her travels? Where it is right now it just seems very sudden and out of place.
      • To be honest, placing it anywhere in the bio makes it out of place. It's not related to her trading, and its not related to her search for information on the Aing-Tii. Placing it at the end doesn't disrupt the flow of those two sections.
    • Also, just as a note, watch for redundant links. Slave, slaver, and slavery all link to the same article. I've fixed these, but just watch out for this in the future. Jonjedigrandmaster (Jujiggum) 22:20, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

Comments