Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Jac Lodain

The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Jac Lodain

• Nominated by: User:Spookywilloww/Sig2 10:38, September 6, 2019 (UTC)
• Nomination comments: That was fun.

(4 ACs/1 Users/5 Total)

Support

1. Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 21:11, September 12, 2019 (UTC)
2. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 17:28, September 24, 2019 (UTC)
3. 1358 ^(Talk) 19:26, September 24, 2019 (UTC)
4. AV-6R7^{Crew Pit} 00:10, September 25, 2019 (UTC)
5. MasterFred^(Whatever) 02:48, September 25, 2019 (UTC)

Object

Anil

• I think you can expand the intro with brief mentions of Jac's parents, or his personality shown during his conversations with Izal Garsea. Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 17:30, September 11, 2019 (UTC)
  • Added both, if that's okay.User:Spookywilloww/Sig2 18:43, September 11, 2019 (UTC)
    • Sure, looks good. Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 02:17, September 12, 2019 (UTC)
• I think the article could use an image of Batuu with a proper caption.
  • Added.User:Spookywilloww/Sig2 18:17, September 12, 2019 (UTC)
• I have to be honest here. While reading the Biography section, especially its last paragraph, I get some play-by-play-ish vibe. This usually happens when there are multiple successive sentences that simply summarize the dialog: "X told so and so, and Y responded bla bla" Please take a look through the text and see if you can put more emphasis on actions, rather than conversations. Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 02:32, September 12, 2019 (UTC)
  • Should be better.User:Spookywilloww/Sig2 18:17, September 12, 2019 (UTC)

Toprawa

• I'm objecting to the use of Matt Martin's Tweet in reference 1 on the grounds of the social media policy, which explicitly states that "Social media posts from Lucasfilm Story Group members or Star Wars authors are not valid independent sources of in-universe information." Martin's Tweet is the only source available to cite A Crash of Fate preceding Galaxy's Edge, thus unequivocally making it an "independent source of in-universe information." Dates and chronological placements are still in-universe pieces of information. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 22:36, September 23, 2019 (UTC)
  • Made an attempt, cut that out. Not super familiar with making these, so apologies if something isn't quite right.User:Spookywilloww/Sig2 23:54, September 23, 2019 (UTC)
    • You've got the right idea. I just don't think you need anything in that reference note besides the first two sentences. It could just read, "The events of A Crash of Fate take place months after the Hosnian Cataclysm, which Star Wars: Galactic Atlas dates to 34 ABY. Jac Lodain is sixteen years old in A Crash of Fate, thus placing is birth around 18 ABY." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 16:46, September 24, 2019 (UTC)
      • Amended.User:Spookywilloww/Sig2 17:12, September 24, 2019 (UTC)

AV

• The second sentence of the second paragraph in the biography section can currently be read as stating that Shari was a Sullustan. I would rewrite it to make it clear that she's human so readers don't conflate her with the Sullustan. - AV-6R7^{Crew Pit} 23:56, September 24, 2019 (UTC)
  • Small adjustment made, does that clarify?User:Spookywilloww/Sig2 00:03, September 25, 2019 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 02:48, September 25, 2019 (UTC)