Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Hanna Ding

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Contents

  • 1 Hanna Ding
    • 1.1 (4 ACs/2 Users/6 Total)
      • 1.1.1 Support
      • 1.1.2 Object
        • 1.1.2.1 spookly
        • 1.1.2.2 Macaroni
        • 1.1.2.3 Fred strikes back
        • 1.1.2.4 Anil
      • 1.1.3 Comments

Hanna Ding

  • Nominated by: ToRsO bOy (talk) 17:24, 1 March 2023 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:
  • Date Archived: 00:05, 25 July 2023 (UTC)
  • Final word count: 732 words (120 introduction, 594 body, 18 behind the scenes)
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:Novels

(4 ACs/2 Users/6 Total)

(Votes required: No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. ACvote JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 04:52, 29 June 2023 (UTC)
  2. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 10:09, 22 July 2023 (UTC)
  3. ACvote —spookywillowwtalk 14:00, 22 July 2023 (UTC)
  4. ACvote Lewisr (talk) 15:23, 22 July 2023 (UTC)
  5. Panther436 (talk) 18:36, 22 July 2023 (UTC)
  6. ACvote Master FredceriqueCommerce Guild(talk) (he/him) 00:05, 25 July 2023 (UTC)

Object

spookly
  • Pronouns update/re-check gender under the new rules.
    • Added pronoun on the infobox. ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:25, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Would like to see a slight intro expansion: adding 2-3 sentences would allow it to be split into two short paragraphs.
    • Added some sentences and split into two paragraphs. ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:25, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
  • The birth date note for Ding should explicitly include 34 BBY in the ref.
    • Added.
  • Infobox referencing should match the body's referencing, whichever way works best to make them both consistent.
    • Species and gender now referenced the same as the infobox. Or did I misunderstood? ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:25, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
  • The first sentence of "Jedi Training" probably can't be sourced to the birth date note.
    • Fixed in the previous objection. ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:25, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
  • "…and later graduated to become a Padawan to a Jedi Master." —Ding's Master should have a page, then have it reflected in the infobox as well.
    • I'm glad you brought this up. Hanna being a Padawan is only mentioned in the CUSWE and never in the novel. Given CUSWE's numerous errors in this novel, I wasn't sure if this was enough to warrant an article for her master? ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:25, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
      • Should be, yeah; a page would be short but still notable.—spookywillowwtalk 20:48, 24 April 2023 (UTC)
        • Added ToRsO bOy (talk) 15:27, 25 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Would like to see date included for the eruption of the Clone Wars.
    • Added ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:25, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Thoughts on making "The Apprentice Tournament"'s first image a bit bigger?
    • Enlarged to 250px. ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:25, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
  • "However, Enwandung-Esterhazy had meticulously studied Ding's previous fights in the past six weeks, and was able to anticipate the move and deflect it."—this seems as if it should have a short mention somewhere prior to the beginning of the tournament itself, since she did begin studying prior to the event itself, for chronology's sakes.
    • I've removed this part to shorten the description of the fight as per the other point raised below. ToRsO bOy (talk) 15:27, 25 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Does "Combat Training Chamber" need a page to then be linked to in the body, since it's capitalized in a quote caption?
    • Added ToRsO bOy (talk) 15:27, 25 April 2023 (UTC)
  • For the fight between the two girls, taking out a little of the play-by-play would be good: though detail is great, it reads as if it's rewording the novel almost, I'd say.
    • Reworded ToRsO bOy (talk) 15:27, 25 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Per the P+T's quote, the fight's aftermath should be documented, at least marginally. Noting that Lena had said something about Hanna would mean that Lena could be linked to, thus avoiding having to link the quote caption, which is always optimal.
    • Added. ToRsO bOy (talk) 15:27, 25 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Unsure where you'd like to put the one sentence, but for the P+T, there's a solo sentence. Usually better to not have one-sentence paragraphs when possible.
    • I just combined it with the last paragraph. Let me know if that's ok. ToRsO bOy (talk) 15:27, 25 April 2023 (UTC)
  • … for Equipment for the "..."
    • Added. ToRsO bOy (talk) 15:27, 25 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Image captions should only have punctuation if made full sentences.
    • Fixed. ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:25, 20 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Make a sweep for missing links if you would; I can copy-edit in anything missing afterward.—spookywillowwtalk 20:35, 13 April 2023 (UTC)
    • Added some I found. Would be grateful for anything you find that I missed. ToRsO bOy (talk) 15:27, 25 April 2023 (UTC)
  • Is the 'Aftermath' subsectioning necessary? With a slight bit of sentence shuffling I think it'd all fit under 'The Apprentice Tournament', and it does look a bit awkward with it only having one paragraph.—spookywillowwtalk 17:30, 29 June 2023 (UTC)
    • Do you mean moving it up as an entire paragraph, or reducing it to fit within the last paragraph of "The Apprentice Tournament"? JMM had one objection about the number of paragraphs per section. ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:26, 10 July 2023 (UTC)
      • Tucking it on the end of the last paragraph of "The Apprentice Tournament," (and if necessary, taking the top few sentences of the last paragraph in that sentence and moving them to the middle paragraph to even out how long each one is). I do see his—I don't think they conflict, though. General precedent where possible avoids 1-paragraph subsections when the content allows for it.—spookywillowwtalk 13:21, 10 July 2023 (UTC)
        • Made adjustments on the last 2 paragraphs. ToRsO bOy (talk) 08:01, 22 July 2023 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • Can you rework the sectioning so that it's not 1 and 4 paragraphs each? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 19:22, 18 May 2023 (UTC)
    • I've added another section and moved one of the paragraphs. Was that what you meant? ToRsO bOy (talk) 06:26, 20 May 2023 (UTC)
      • With 5 paragraphs you'd ideally have one section of 2 and another of 3, though I'm not sure if that's doable on this article. What do you think? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 23:46, 28 May 2023 (UTC)
        • I've added a 2nd paragraph on the first section and expanded the fight a bit. Does this work better? ToRsO bOy (talk) 14:28, 29 May 2023 (UTC)
  • Can you tell me where the book says this? "she underwent extensive training in the ways of the Force" JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 17:41, 11 June 2023 (UTC)
    • Not in those exact words. I thought it was a good way to describe the rigorous training all Jedi undergo at the temple. Too much? ToRsO bOy (talk) 14:52, 22 June 2023 (UTC)
      • Yeah, I think we should avoid making those kinds of statements unless they're supported by the source. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 23:04, 22 June 2023 (UTC)
        • Removed the adjective.ToRsO bOy (talk) 05:05, 23 June 2023 (UTC)
Fred strikes back
  • Can we get a word or two of context for the trials in the intro?
    • Added. ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:26, 10 July 2023 (UTC)
  • Wouldn't it be better to say she was born "around 33 BBY" instead of 34? 14+19=33. Master FredceriqueCommerce Guild(talk) (he/him) 22:39, 8 July 2023 (UTC)
    • Fixed. Appreciate the explanation. I basically copied it from Scout's page.ToRsO bOy (talk) 11:26, 10 July 2023 (UTC)
Anil
  • I'm a little confused about "grabbing lightsaber blades with hand." Are these training lightsabers? If so, could you please clarify that in the article?
    • Added a mention. ToRsO bOy (talk) 08:01, 22 July 2023 (UTC)
  • Does Yoda: Dark Rendezvous explicitly say that Ding's saber had a green crystal or establish that all lightsabers have crystals that give the blade their color? If not, I think it'd be better to just say that Ding's weapon emitted a green blade. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 02:48, 15 July 2023 (UTC)
    • Updated ToRsO bOy (talk) 08:01, 22 July 2023 (UTC)
  • (Reviewing note) Per the Manual of Style, when pipelinking, all characters should be placed inside the link brackets. e.g. [[Training lightsaber/Legends|training lightsabers]] instead of [[Training lightsaber/Legends|training lightsaber]]s TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 10:09, 22 July 2023 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 00:05, 25 July 2023 (UTC)