- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
George R. Binks
(+5)
Support
- Imperialles 00:07, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
- Greyman(Talk) 16:17, 4 March 2008 (UTC)
- Nice job, Imp. Toprawa and Ralltiir 19:24, 5 March 2008 (UTC)
- --Eyrezer 22:48, 21 March 2008 (UTC)
- -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 11:43, 25 March 2008 (UTC)
Oppose
- Toprawa:
Is there a reason why the article refers to him exclusively by his first name? For greater encyclopedic tone, please reword these instances to refer to him by his last name only in all subsequent mentions following the initial. I understand this may have been done to avoid confusion between George and Jar Jar, but since George is the obvious centerpiece of this article, referring to him almost exclusively as "Binks" will not create confusion.- Done. --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
A few things here. First, "that" should be more appropriately reworded as "who"; "Captain" should not be capitalized in this instance. Please specify what he was a captain. It may serve better to move the captain into the next sentence, to say he was the owner and captain of his company, assuming that is the case: "George R. Binks was an Otolla Gungan whaler and Captain that operated and resided on Naboo. He was the owner of Binks & Son Whaling Company"- I removed the "captain" thing. It's not an official rank, it merely means that he commanded his own ship. --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
What exactly is a "fateful whale"? "George R. Binks encountered a fateful whale"- Reworded. --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
Please reword this. We have some idea of when he was born. You can say something like before the fall of the Republic, before whatever date Jar Jar was born, assuming we know that: "George R. Binks was born in Otoh Gunga on Naboo at an unknown point in time,"- Done. --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
Please kill this red link. It shouldn't be that hard: "He eventually married another woman, not out of love"- Done. --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
Please reword this so each clause doesn't end in it: "He attempted to harpoon it, but merely angered it"- Done. --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
I would rather like to see this sentence arranged so that the parenthetical prose can be removed: "(a suicidal task due to the treacherous seas as well the distance involved)"- Dashes! --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
Please change "that" to "who": "George R. Binks was an experienced whaler and sailor that took"- Done. --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
The article could benefit from a BTS.- BTS added. --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
Since you provide referencing for Jar Jar's birth, it would be best to go ahead and source the entire article, even though he has but one appearance- Done. --Imperialles 00:55, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
- One more thing:
After looking at the link to their island, I see that he decided to name the piece of land after himself. Please make a mention of this in the article someplace.Toprawa and Ralltiir 05:04, 3 March 2008 (UTC)- Done. --Imperialles 14:00, 5 March 2008 (UTC)
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