Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Bravo 1

< Wookieepedia:Good article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Bravo 1

  • Nominated by: NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 04:22, January 2, 2012 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: A subject discovered because of the Barn Burner.

(3 ACs/4 Users/7 Total)

Support

  1. Is Darth Plagueis a good read? Clone Commander Lee Talk 11:22, January 4, 2012 (UTC)
    • Seems like it will be. The promo sectons are great. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 07:56, January 6, 2012 (UTC)
  2. ACvote—Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 16:01, January 20, 2012 (UTC)
  3. Great Article! brightfur (Questions or comments) 06:51, February 14, 2012 (UTC)
  4. Just meet the below objections and, please, rid it of the redlinks! :P MasterFredCommerce Guild(Whatever) 17:49, February 15, 2012 (UTC)
    • I don't have the book and the Amazon preview thingie wasn't kind to me. /shrug NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 18:38, February 15, 2012 (UTC)
  5. ACvote Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 21:37, March 2, 2012 (UTC)
  6. Inqvote Burn that barn. Menkooroo 22:10, March 6, 2012 (UTC)
  7. Exiled Jedi Oldrepublic crest (Greetings) 23:32, March 6, 2012 (UTC)

Object

Lee's charge
  • It is not entirely clear for me if Olie owned that thing or just flew it. Could you clarify this?
    • It's not stated either way. Removed "personal" from the intro. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 23:44, January 3, 2012 (UTC)
  • Context for Bravo Squadron in the intro. The Space Corps has to be mentioned anyway in there.
  • Maybe a bit context in the history section on Olie and that he was stationed on Naboo.
    • That comes with "Naboo's Royal Starfighter Corp." He wouldn't be stationed anywhere else. It's actually why Olie chose to be in the Corp rather than a galactic army. It does say in the History that the ship was on Naboo. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 23:44, January 3, 2012 (UTC)
  • While I appreciate good humor, please rephrase the image caption. :P
    • I was actually encouraged to do that on the IRC. It's a bit of a tradition. Plag changed it. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 23:44, January 3, 2012 (UTC)
      • Wait a second. You weren't saying change "This" to "A" were you?! (;p) NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 23:46, January 3, 2012 (UTC)
        • No. :P
  • Otherwise very good work. Clone Commander Lee Talk 11:58, January 2, 2012 (UTC)
Cal Jedi
  • Nubian 221 is a redirect. It redirects to 221 sublight engine. In my copy-edit, I pipelinked "221 sublight engine" with "Nubian 221." Is Nubian 221 what the source really says? If not, we could remove the pipelink and just leave it at "221 sublight engine."
    • Borsk Fey'lya moved the page while I was working on the article. "Nubia" is the company that made the engine, so it wouldn't be odd for Nubia 221 to be a shortening. For now, I'm erring with him, changing to the longer title, and I've asked him on his talkpage about it. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 23:44, January 3, 2012 (UTC)
      • Okay. I'll strike it once we find out for sure what's going on.—Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 23:54, January 3, 2012 (UTC)
        • We're all square. They were identified without the company name in the title by an adventure book. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 14:06, January 6, 2012 (UTC)
  • "...was within a Royal Palace hangar in the capital, Theed..." - Capital of what?
  • A date for the TPM novel and film in the BTS would be good.
    • If you want dates, add them. It's not like I'm going to revert an additive edit. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 23:44, January 3, 2012 (UTC)
      • That's why I objected to it. I think it's something more than a SOFIXIT.—Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 23:54, January 3, 2012 (UTC)
        • What I mean is they aren't required and if I don't think of them then I don't worry about them. You can't object to their absence. Nonetheless, you can throw them in if you feel like it and I'll continue to not worry about. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 01:58, January 4, 2012 (UTC)
  • Good work.—Cal JediInfinite Empire (Personal Comm Channel) 01:02, January 3, 2012 (UTC)
Jujiggum
  • Several incorrect uses of "lead" vs. "led"
  • Some choppy sentences and awkward comma usage in the intro.
    • Better? NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 21:16, January 29, 2012 (UTC)
      • This is better, but there's still a bit of awkwardly wording. This: "…and he outfitted it with a customized control configuration." doesn't fit with the sentence it's in. And this is also poorly worded: "The Control Ship was destroyed, which deactivated the Federation's entire force, with the effort of Bravo Squadron fighters." Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 01:54, January 31, 2012 (UTC)
        • How's that? NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 00:19, February 9, 2012 (UTC)
          • Slightly better in parts; slightly worse in others. This objection remains. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 01:15, February 9, 2012 (UTC)
            • Terribly sorry about the wait. I rewrote it. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 19:14, March 2, 2012 (UTC)
  • Myriad missing links.
    • The article is 900 words long. It may have three redlinks. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 17:36, January 27, 2012 (UTC)
      • I'm very well aware of how many redlinks the article may have. However, "missing links" have absolutely nothing to do with redlinks. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 19:16, January 27, 2012 (UTC)
        • Ah. Sorry, I misunderstood. I don't think we need an article on control configurations. I assume it's the steering wheel, but they didn't even get that much context so it wouldn't have application outside of N-1s. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 21:16, January 29, 2012 (UTC)
          • No problem; and I agree that that's not needed, but there are other links (to articles which we already have) that are still missing. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 01:54, January 31, 2012 (UTC)
            • Swept through more times. Anything else i missed? NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 00:19, February 9, 2012 (UTC)
  • "…and included two laser cannons that fired green bolts and two proton torpedo dispensors that fired from the same launch tube with a full complement of eight missiles." Grammatically, this could suggest that the two proton torpedo dispensors fired from the same tube as did the laser cannons.
  • "The other prongs were Bravo 1's wings…" There's a mention that the craft was three-pronged, but there's no mention that prior to this you were specifically talking about the central prong.
  • "From his coronation, Naboo's King Ars Veruna maintained a project…" A few things here. Firstly, this makes it sound like he had already conceived the project beforehand; is that the case? Secondly, the sentence could be rearranged to much more clearly and efficiently state that his project was specifically the development of the N-1 starfighter. Also, do we know enough about the coronation to warrant a link?
    • 1st: It doesn't say if he had the idea before he was crowned, but it does say he started it very soon after he was crowned. The way it's written is ambiguous enough, IMO. 2nd: How's that? 3rd: Nope. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 21:16, January 29, 2012 (UTC)
      • Okay, that works then; and much better! :) This is exactly the kind of quick sentence fix I'm looking for in the intro; and this is the kind of writing maturity I know you're capable of as a seasoned nommer here. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 01:54, January 31, 2012 (UTC)
  • Second sentence of History has poor wording, namely: "was able to have some produced." There must be a way to state more clearly that several N-1 starfighters were constructed by that time.
  • Grammar again in the third sentence of History.
    • You were going for the "comma which", no?
  • Grammar in the fourth sentence as well: "It" could be referring to Bravo Flight itself, the nature of which is left uncertain due to the wording of the previous sentence.
  • Second paragraph of History is a bit awkward. I think the first sentence could be put on the first paragraph, and the second sentence could be put at the beginning of the next paragraph, no?
  • "Bravo 1 and Bravo Squadron skirmished with enemy Vulture droids and on an order from Olié split between those who would continue to stave off the droids and those that would attack the ship's transmitters." Grammar/wording confusion again here.
    • Commas to the rescue. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 21:16, January 29, 2012 (UTC)
  • "Bravo 1 was part of a strafing run, but its laser cannons could not pierce the ship's deflector shields." Do you mean the Lucrehulk? The last ships you've mentioned were the Vultures.
  • "Bravo Squadron's assault deactivated all the Trade Federation droids on the surface, giving Amidala leverage enough to compel them to sign a treaty and release the planet." I don't believe, as this suggests, that the droids signed the treaty… (unless we're speaking metaphorically) :P
  • In Commanders and crew, could you please state sooner that his superstition was that R2-A6 specifically was a good luck charm? As a standalone sentence this is confusing; there's nothing presented here that actually states what his superstition is: "Because of his superstitious nature, Olié used an R2-series astromech droid designated R2-A6 when piloting Bravo 1." You don't specify that until the next sentence, which is short and choppy.
  • Was the Theed expansion or the SWCCG released in December of 2001?
    • The sentence is clearly referring to the expansion. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 17:36, January 27, 2012 (UTC)
      • Most of the time when I make these objections it's simply a grammatical technicality; I can usually tell what it's referring to, it just grammatically isn't specific. However, the way this is written, I honestly was not certain. Please just take care of the objection. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 19:16, January 27, 2012 (UTC)
        • This better? NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 21:16, January 29, 2012 (UTC)
          • Yes; I ended up switching phrase positions here because I felt like it would read more smoothly that way, but feel free to tweak this however you like. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 01:54, January 31, 2012 (UTC)
  • Please make the image larger; it's unreasonably small considering it's the only image with the amount of text you have in the article.
  • The redlinks! They burn my eyes! I'll give it another go-round once these are taken care of. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 05:26, January 27, 2012 (UTC)
  • Intro-exclusive information.
    • Did I get it? If not, specifics please. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 17:41, February 21, 2012 (UTC)
  • "After some time, it was shot down and landed inside the Control Ship." Verb confusion.
    • Not really familiar with this mistake. Did I fix it? NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 17:41, February 21, 2012 (UTC)
  • There's some inconsistency within the article regarding who actually destroyed the Control Ship and how exactly the droids were deactivated. Please make sure your phrasing on these matters is clear, consistent, and canonical. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 01:15, February 9, 2012 (UTC)
Bravo won!
  • One redlink that will need to be killed: The Battle of Chommell Minor should be in the "Present for Battles" section of the infobox.
  • Can you mention that his droid was present for the Battle of Naboo in the "History" section? Menkooroo 19:34, February 15, 2012 (UTC)
  • Just one more: "When it was brought to Olié's attention, he ordered his pilots to stay out of the Control Ship and to buy Bravo Fighter time to escape." is sourced to The Phantom Menace. Is that really from the film? In the film, I thought that the Bravos only noticed Anakin with "Look, one of ours, coming out from the inside!"
  • Great work. I count more than 1,000 words; if you wanted to FAN it, I'd support. :) Menkooroo 02:09, March 3, 2012 (UTC)
Exiled Jedi
  • In reference to Jon's objection about the intro, I think that perhaps you are trying to fit too much varying information in a couple of the sentences. I believe that the first and third sentences in the intro should be easily split into two smaller sentences. I think that it would also be better if you mentioned what type of ship it was before you said when it was constructed.
  • Other than this issue, the article is great.--Exiled Jedi Oldrepublic crest (Greetings) 21:20, February 25, 2012 (UTC)
    • Thanks for the advice. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 19:14, March 2, 2012 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 10:39, March 7, 2012 (UTC)


  • Updated for Darth Plagueis. Yes, you read that right. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 01:54, January 4, 2012 (UTC)
  • Should I leave "Bravo One" as written in the book for the lead quote? The reason I didn't move the page is because all numbers are spelled out. Even "N-one" for some odd reason. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 02:32, January 4, 2012 (UTC)
  • If you'll stay the vote to remove until this weekend, I'll have had free time to get it done. Busy, busy. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 01:25, February 28, 2012 (UTC)
    • Thanks a ton, Jon. NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo 03:00, February 28, 2012 (UTC)

Vote to remove nomination (AC only)

ACvote Untouched objection for well over two weeks now. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 17:22, February 27, 2012 (UTC)
Withholding through the weekend per Naru's request. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 02:29, February 28, 2012 (UTC)