Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Bendix Fust

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Bendix Fust

  • Nominated by: --Eyrezer 01:15, 22 May 2009 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Reading this article will induce euphoria, while shortening your life

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)

Support

  1. Good job :) Jonjedigrandmaster (Jujiggum) 02:32, 22 May 2009 (UTC)
  2. ACvote CC7567 (talk) 07:05, 22 May 2009 (UTC)
  3. SoresuMakashi(Everything I tell you is a lie) 05:52, 25 May 2009 (UTC)
  4. ACvote Grunny (Talk) 07:56, 29 May 2009 (UTC)
  5. ACvote Cavalier OneFarStar(Squadron channel) 08:20, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

Object

  1. The Grand Master
    • context for Zam and Jango in the intro.
    • You spell death sticks "death sticks" in the intro, and "deathsticks" in the body. Which is correct?
    • "Shapeshifting" should be linked.
    • "arrived at the cell fractionally after her" this is slightly awkward, please reword.
    • Is the ship they hijacked Slave I? If so, it should be linked. (If not, forgive my ignorance)
    • Jonjedigrandmaster (Jujiggum) 01:36, 22 May 2009 (UTC)
      • Ok, I think I got all of them. I'm confused about the shapeshifting request though. You added a number of other links yourself, why not this one? The new ship is indeed Slave I. I've now pipelinked it seeing as the identity of the ship is not relevant to Fust at all. --Eyrezer 02:21, 22 May 2009 (UTC)
        • I'd normally copyedit that, but nobody ever links it, so I thought I should place it here :P. Jonjedigrandmaster (Jujiggum) 02:32, 22 May 2009 (UTC)
  2. The clone wants a shortened life
    • "Fust smuggled death sticks, an illegal euphoria-inducing drug": subject/plural agreement isn't really working here for me. Please try to reword if you can.
    • "When Sebolto found out, he placed a bounty on Fust's head, resulting in Zam Wesell and Jango Fett breaking the Mordageen out of the Desolation Alley maximum security prison, and handing him over to the Dug." The second part of the sentence needs to include a noun, i.e. "he placed a bounty on Fust's head, resulting in the <noun> of <stuff>", for it to flow better.
    • Include his gender in the body? It's currently exclusive to the intro and the infobox.
    • "consequently on his capture by Republic forces, he was to be imprisoned": needs a bit of rewording.
      • It's mainly the "on his capture" that was my concern; it's not very clear to me. Do you mean "consequently, after his capture"? CC7567 (talk) 06:28, 22 May 2009 (UTC)
    • CC7567 (talk) 01:39, 22 May 2009 (UTC)
      • I got the rest, but I don't understand the second one there... Feel free to adjust it if you can. --Eyrezer 02:21, 22 May 2009 (UTC)
  3. Soresu would like to buy some death sticks
    • Just one minor thing: The bounty hunters then took Fust to Malastare, Sebolto's homeworld. Fett then allowed Wesell to hand Fust over to Sebolto at his palace, "Then" is a little bit repetitive. SoresuMakashi(Everything I tell you is a lie) 10:24, 23 May 2009 (UTC)
      • Fixed --Eyrezer 03:06, 25 May 2009 (UTC)

Comments

  • Quotes on their way --Eyrezer 01:17, 22 May 2009 (UTC)

Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 08:20, 29 May 2009 (UTC)