- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Bek-Vulkar War
- Nominated by: Goodwood
(Alliance Intelligence) 01:08, 22 January 2009 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: Been sitting on this one a looooooooooong time. Working out the kinks before the FAN page.
(2 ACs/2 Users/4 Total)
Support
Cylka-talk- 11:51, 22 January 2009 (UTC)- NaruHina Talk
23:48, 22 January 2009 (UTC) - SoresuMakashi(Everything I tell you is a lie) 00:32, 24 January 2009 (UTC)
Chack Jadson (Talk) 15:49, 15 February 2009 (UTC)
DC 18:02, 18 February 2009 (UTC)
Object
- Cylka:
In the introduction, I would add in that the Endar Spire was destroyed in orbit over Taris, that is why Revan and Carth were trapped there. I would also mention that Bastila had been on the ship as well.- Added.
It was Thek who suggested to Revan that he needed to win the Season Opener to free Bastila and gave him the means to win. I think it would be good to explain their bargain a bit more when it is first alluded to in the Revan's involvement sub-section.- This necessitated a decent amount of restructuring, however it was for the better. Thanks for pointing this out.
Maybe you should include why Zaerdra objected to Mission helping Revan, just to give a little context.- Done.
A bit more context is needed on the blockade that Revan et al. needed to esacape. Maybe a mention that the Sith not only quarantined the planet, but put in place an orbital blockade as well.- Contextualized.
- A good read about an overlooked subject. Cylka-talk- 04:47, 22 January 2009 (UTC)
- Thank you very much.--Goodwood
(Alliance Intelligence) 05:16, 22 January 2009 (UTC)
- Thank you very much.--Goodwood
- The Life Note
- Soresu
The Jedi Shan? Could we just use Shan? Jedi Shan sounds a bit... off. No-one says the Jedi Windu or the Jedi Kenobi.- Fixed. Yeah, that does sound a bit peaky.
This scuffle resulted in the death of Brejik and an end to the war. Do we know for a fact that the death of Brejik ended the war? Same goes for that last sentence in 'The Season Opener'.- Elaborated in both instances; the gang is essentially beheaded, and the Beks gain a lot of support due to their sponsorship of the winning rider.
I don't really see the relevance of the first paragraph in 'Origins' beyond the first sentence. It basically covers the Taris Resistance and invasion of Taris, but that's not really related to the subject of the Bek-Vulkar War.- Both paragraphs have been reworked to, hopefully, give a bit more relevance.
The amnesiac former Dark Lord of the Sith, Revan, who had been reprogrammed by the Council. Reprogrammed? I know what you mean, but it sounds too droid-like.- Changed to "memory modified."
A also think the first paragraph in 'Revan's involvement' could be trimmed down a little. You really only need to give an outline of why he was on Taris and how he found the Beks, not a full blown biography.- The only "biography" of Revan is this: "The amnesiac former Dark Lord of the Sith, Revan, who had had his memory modified by the Council of the Jedi Enclave on Dantooine, was aboard the vessel as part of the overall plan set by the Jedi Order to find and destroy the Star Forge, the source of materiel for the Sith war effort." Other than that, I've trimmed as much as possible—which wasn't much—from that paragraph.
I would consider Revan to be a key Bek figure, so it would be nice you could give gim an entry there.- Not sure I could agree, but nevertheless, one has been added.--Goodwood
(Alliance Intelligence) 22:42, 23 January 2009 (UTC)
- He did take out a large number of Vulkars, steal the prototype accelerator and win the opener, effectively winning the war for the Beks, which is why I consider him a key figure. SoresuMakashi(Everything I tell you is a lie) 00:32, 24 January 2009 (UTC)
- Not sure I could agree, but nevertheless, one has been added.--Goodwood
- That seems to be everything, I'm sure the people over at FA will pick up on anything we missed. SoresuMakashi(Everything I tell you is a lie) 05:02, 23 January 2009 (UTC)
- Toprawa:
I find both of the "Key figures" sections to be really unnecessary weight to this article. They're just pointless biographical summaries that offer little to the primary concentration of the article: the war. Please cut these out and incorporate any vital information into more relevants sections. Toprawa and Ralltiir 06:11, 24 January 2009 (UTC)- The key figures section is very necesary because it outlines who the leaders of the group are. NaruHina Talk
09:43, 24 January 2009 (UTC)
- Aside from the fact that I'm not turning this into a post-mortem Goodwood debate where he directs this argument vicariously from behind the scenes, and in sole response to Cylka, per IRC, there is already a "Combatants" section. Please combine these two and cut out the unnecessary bulk. Toprawa and Ralltiir 05:27, 25 January 2009 (UTC)
- The key figures section is very necesary because it outlines who the leaders of the group are. NaruHina Talk
Layout Guide Issue: The Aftermath section should be before the Combatants section. DC 18:10, 16 February 2009 (UTC)- Struck per discusssion with Cylka. DC 18:02, 18 February 2009 (UTC)
Comments
- I'm not really going to object to this, but I think that most of the quotes should be changed. They should be by the person in qustion and about the person in question if possible. NaruHina Talk
23:41, 22 January 2009 (UTC)
- I'm not sure I understand this. Why should the quote be by the individual in question? I was under the impression that if the quote was about the individual in question, that was acceptable as well. Cylka-talk- 23:24, 23 January 2009 (UTC)
- Because any quote that uses the person's name is techincally about them and its a bit of a stylistic choice, but generally the best quotes characters about the character are said by the character. Tchnically you could use "I love you Revan" as his quote but you wouldn't because he says much better stuff himself. NaruHina Talk
00:03, 24 January 2009 (UTC)
- There's nothing in the MoS/LG/etc. and no real precedent for preferring one over another—just go with whatever quote is the most illustrative. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 00:11, 24 January 2009 (UTC)
- Because any quote that uses the person's name is techincally about them and its a bit of a stylistic choice, but generally the best quotes characters about the character are said by the character. Tchnically you could use "I love you Revan" as his quote but you wouldn't because he says much better stuff himself. NaruHina Talk
- I'm not sure I understand this. Why should the quote be by the individual in question? I was under the impression that if the quote was about the individual in question, that was acceptable as well. Cylka-talk- 23:24, 23 January 2009 (UTC)
- In light of recent events, I will be taking over the task of handling any objections to this nomination. Cylka-talk- 06:03, 24 January 2009 (UTC)
Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 18:02, 18 February 2009 (UTC)