- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Xer VIII
- Nominated by: Thefourdotelipsis 13:05, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: "When the king is off his arse... nobody sleeps!"
(4 Inqs/2 Users/6 Total)
Support
Xicer9
(Combadge) 06:13, June 27, 2010 (UTC)- Good stuff. When can we expect the successor? --Imperialles 02:23, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- Jinzler 21:10, July 4, 2010 (UTC)
- Interesting topic. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 01:34, July 6, 2010 (UTC)
CC7567 (talk) 01:26, July 11, 2010 (UTC)- — Fiolli {Alpheridies University ComNet} 01:43, July 14, 2010 (UTC)
Object
Xicer
There's no indication of when anything in the first section of the bio takes place, or the intro for that matter.- Done.
Wouldn't hurt to list his species and date of birth somewhere in the bio.- Done.
Something's up with your refs. You have two sets of refs leading to "The History of Xim and the Tion Cluster." Additionally, you have two refs with the same name leading to different things.- Fixed.
P&T: "His ruthless governing techniques allowed him to ascertain his reputation, as he effectively destroyed anyone under his rule that was weak and useless" Eh, POV unless you say something like "anyone under his rule that he considered weak and useless."- Done.
There have got to be more categories he belongs to.- Added a few more.
No other quotes? Something from the play at least?- Done.
- A nice read, but please watch your linking. Xicer9(Combadge) 05:35, June 27, 2010 (UTC)
- I'll keep that in mind. Thefourdotelipsis 06:06, June 27, 2010 (UTC)
Jinzler
P. 94 of The Essential Atlas mentions that Xer deeded Raxus Prime to his concubines and their retainers, this needs mentioning in the article.- Added.
In "The Despotica Part IV", in the play Evocar, Indrexu is referred to as the eighth wife of Xer. This also needs mentioning.- In there now.
- Other than that, this is a top-quality, interesting and well-written article. Nice work. --Jinzler 09:05, July 1, 2010 (UTC)
- Thank you very much. :) Thefourdotelipsis 09:51, July 1, 2010 (UTC)
Jujiggum
Just one minor thing. This sentence is short and choppy and doesn't really seem to fit in its current placement in the bio. "Xim would become known as 'the Despot.' "Good work as usual. Jonjedigrandmaster (Talk) 22:00, July 5, 2010 (UTC)- Good point. Fixed, and thanks for the review. Thefourdotelipsis 01:32, July 6, 2010 (UTC)
Attack of the Clone
Just one: is it "empire" or "Empire" when you refer to it? The article is overall a bit inconsistent, even with the distinction between references to "a" empire and "the" empire.CC7567 (talk) 05:13, July 10, 2010 (UTC)- Went with "empire" but I call it "an empire" before it is created, to be unspecific, and then switch to "the" when it's a specific empire I'm referring to. Thefourdotelipsis 01:10, July 11, 2010 (UTC)
Just a single noodle
Quickie: the first quote says that the saying is "popular." Does the source say "popular" or was it simply "common?" Popular without explicit stating violates POV. Otherwise, excellent job. Just a few tweaks had to be made, mostly with tense/mood usage for the word "would." — Fiolli {Alpheridies University ComNet} 01:22, July 14, 2010 (UTC)- Good point, I've changed it to "common." As for the "Would" stuff... yeah, that's a pretty bad habit. Thanks for cleaning it up though, and thanks for the review. Thefourdotelipsis 01:32, July 14, 2010 (UTC)
- No problem, as it is easy to do. Nice article. — Fiolli {Alpheridies University ComNet} 01:43, July 14, 2010 (UTC)
- Good point, I've changed it to "common." As for the "Would" stuff... yeah, that's a pretty bad habit. Thanks for cleaning it up though, and thanks for the review. Thefourdotelipsis 01:32, July 14, 2010 (UTC)
Comments
Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 01:43, July 14, 2010 (UTC)