Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Mee Deechi/Legends

< Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations | Mee Deechi
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Mee Deechi

  • Nominated by: Darth Trayus(Trayus Academy) 09:24, June 25, 2012 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: I haven't done anything for TCW in quite a while.

(4 Inqs/2 Users/6 Total)

Support

  1. Plagueis327 04:01, June 26, 2012 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote I didn't know France existed in Star Wars. IFYLOFD (Floyd's crib) 03:40, August 1, 2012 (UTC)
  3. Inqvote Cavalier OneFarStar(Squadron channel) 11:50, August 2, 2012 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote This article is Mee-Peachy. Menkooroo (talk) 06:22, August 7, 2012 (UTC)
  5. Inqvote CC7567 (talk) 20:19, August 10, 2012 (UTC)
  6. Nice.—Jedi Kasra ("Indeed.") 22:53, August 12, 2012 (UTC)

Object

Attack of the Clone
  • Would it be possible to adjust the first sentence of the intro so that it tells more about Deechi besides the fact that he lived before the Empire? Bringing over some of the detail from the second sentence would be good.
    • For personal stylistic reasons, I usually prefer to keep the first sentence of any introduction as simple as possible; name, species, gender, and historical era. I've added in "politician" for a bit more specificity, if that helps. Darth Trayus(Trayus Academy) 08:41, August 6, 2012 (UTC)
  • Was Purs a senator before she assassinated Farr, or did she replace Farr following his death? This isn't very clear in the intro. I know there isn't a lot of source material about this, but I remember that Divo addressed her as "Senator" after Farr's death, and I also vaguely remember something from New Battlefronts (possibly?) saying something about how she was a representative. I don't know if "representative" can be taken to replace "senator," but it's worth checking the books.
    • I'll double check, but if I recall correctly, most sources refer to her simply as "senator" and if they do call her a representative, it's always with a lower-case "r", indicating that it's not an official title. I won't have access to New Battlefronts anytime soon though, so if you get an opportunity to check that before I do, I'd much appreciate any information you can provide.
      • I'll go and check New Battlefronts for you and whatever else I can dig up. CC7567 (talk) 04:10, August 7, 2012 (UTC)
        • I checked the character encyclopedia; not helpful. Darth Trayus(Trayus Academy) 06:31, August 7, 2012 (UTC)
          • New Battlefronts calls her a "Rodian Representative" (capitalized exactly that way), and never a senator. "As a Rodian Representative, Lolo Purs's job is to assist Onaconda Farr with the planet's legislative affairs, which includes rounding up votes that would halt production of more clones." I would take that to mean that she was first an Associate Planetary Representative alongside Farr, and then succeeded Farr as senator of Rodia after his assassination. As for Deechi, New Battlefront says: Deechi is a fiery suporter of the war, and tells Padmé that trying to end the fighting us unpatriotic." His uniform is called an "Umbaran silk tunic," which looks like it should get mentioned in the article. CC7567 (talk) 00:54, August 9, 2012 (UTC)
            • Mkay, info's been added. Thanks! (although now I may have to write Purs' article too...) Darth Trayus(Trayus Academy) 19:31, August 9, 2012 (UTC)
  • Please double-check your linking before I review. CC7567 (talk) 23:43, August 2, 2012 (UTC)
  • It sounds like it's worth tying Tyranus back to Dooku; it may not be directly relevant to Deechi, but it's nevertheless a connection that should be drawn to help the reader understand more.
    • Clarified, although it strikes me as being rather clunky.
  • Nitpicky, but can the Umbarans' secession from the Republic be sourced to "Darkness on Umbara"? To date, that detail has only been mentioned in the Encyclopedia.
    • Changed it to the encyclopedia.
  • "through ruthless political games": could you be more specific here? What are you referring to—the fact that he sent someone to follow Farr, or something else?
    • Clarified.
  • Fair warning: Part Five is going to take a while, so it might be Part Six or later if you beat me with your next article. :P CC7567 (talk) 02:11, August 10, 2012 (UTC)
    • The Republic military enhancement bill should be coming down the pipeline next, but we'll see how long it takes. I'm admittedly a bit jealous you got to the Sep Congress before me :P Darth Trayus(Trayus Academy) 07:07, August 10, 2012 (UTC)
      • Apologies; I didn't see it on your user page, so I didn't know if you were interested in it or not. But I definitely need you to review it once it's done—it's gonna take a lot of effort, and I have a feeling that I'm going to overlook something. CC7567 (talk) 20:19, August 10, 2012 (UTC)
Deechi!
  • Early in the bio, can "because of his standing" be sourced to anything (maybe ref [5])? A little nitpicky, but the Encyclopedia entry on Umbara says that Deechi represents the planet but doesn't say why.
    • Done. :)
  • Senate Building isn't linked until late in the biography. Can you mention both the Senate Building and the Grand Convocation Chamber the first time that Deechi attends a Senate session there? Possibly repulsorpod too, although that one doesn't seem quite as necessary.
    • I moved up the Senate Building link and added the repulsorpod; I left the GCC link where it is though. Let me know what you think.
  • P&T mentions the grey markings around his eye sockets but not his overall pale skin.
    • Woops. Added.
  • "The character was revived for the season three episode..." Any chance of a word other than "revived?" The previous sentence mentions that he dies, so I can definitely see it being confusing.
    • Good catch.
  • Added a few more links in my copy-edit. Hooray! Good job on this guy. Menkooroo (talk) 04:08, August 7, 2012 (UTC)

Comments

Approved as a Featured article by Inquisitorius 22:57, August 12, 2012 (UTC)