Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Endar Spire (second nomination)

The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was unsuccessful. Please do not modify it.

Endar Spire

• Nominated by: Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 14:31, September 22, 2010 (UTC)
• Nomination comments: This was considered once before, in 2009, but I took over the nomination efforts and am re-nominating.

(0 Inqs/0 Users/0 Total)

Support

Object

Xd1358

• Could you expand the intro slightly?
  • Try it now. Is that enough, or bigger still? Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 17:45, September 22, 2010 (UTC)
• Can you make your paragraph length more consistent?
  • Can you give me some tips on that? At a glance, they all look roughly 3-5 lines each, with some compressed by pictures making them longer. I can adjust, but I'm not sure how. Thanks! Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 17:45, September 22, 2010 (UTC)
    • Yeah, I think the three row paragraphs should be merged. IMO, paragraphs should be over five rows or so. 1358 ^(Talk) 17:50, September 22, 2010 (UTC)
      • Try it now? Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 14:20, October 4, 2010 (UTC)
• 1358 ^(Talk) 14:33, September 22, 2010 (UTC)

Pasta

There are a few things, at first glance, that need to be fixed before I dive into this fully.

• Appearances and sources: The Campaign Guide is used as a citation, but it is not included in the list. Also, please check Chronicles of the Old Republic for information, as I believe there might be something useful in there.
  • Try it now? Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 15:07, October 4, 2010 (UTC)
    • Was Chronicles added just because I mentioned it or because it actually contains information that addresses the Endar Spire? — Fiolli 22:45, October 17, 2010 (UTC)
      • It did contain info. Not much, granted, but it's there. The main new piece of info was that the Endar Spire was part of a larger fleet, even though in-game all you saw was the one ship. It's all in the prose, intro, body, and Behind the Scenes all. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 13:29, October 18, 2010 (UTC)
        • Follow-up: It did not reference the Endar Spire by name, but referenced the actions of a Jedi Battle Fleet engaging the Sith at Taris (and then also referencing the theft of the Ebon Hawk). So the Endar Spire is indirectly mentioned, as it would have been part of that fleet. The fact that the fleet existed is in both the main prose and the Behind the Scenes (the latter with a reference that we never saw such a fleet in the game). Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 13:33, October 18, 2010 (UTC)
• Date citation:
  • KotOR is not an acceptable source for 3,956 BBY. Please use something that explicitly states this date.
    • NEC and Chronicles. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 15:07, October 4, 2010 (UTC)
      • Something is going to have to be mentioned in the ref-note about the NEC and how it connects to the Endar Spire, since that vessel (I believe) is not mentioned in the text. — Fiolli 22:45, October 17, 2010 (UTC)
        • I'll gladly follow up on that tonight (my NEC isn't with me). Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 13:29, October 18, 2010 (UTC)
  • Following up on this, as well, does the NEC explicitly state that 3,956 BBY is when the Endar Spire first appears and is destroyed? If so, this should be in the source list. If not, the citation is not proper.
    • I don't have the NEC in front of me, but the KOTOR article cites the NEC's 3956 BBY as the year of the events of KOTOR in general, including the destruction of the Endar Spire. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 15:07, October 4, 2010 (UTC)
      • Two things with this: (1) Just because it is in another (and, I might add, non-FA) article does not make it an appropriate citation. (2) See my point above about whether or not the NEC actually contains the ship or merely associated information that is being logically connected together. — Fiolli 22:45, October 17, 2010 (UTC)
        • Will follow up on this. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 13:29, October 18, 2010 (UTC)
  • 3,951 BBY does not come from TSL, just like 3,956 BBY does not come from KotOR. Please find a proper citation.
    • Found the source for the year 3,951 BBY (a video interview), and confirmed the info. Now properly sourced. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 15:07, October 4, 2010 (UTC)
• Nothing mentions the three surviving soldiers until the legacy section. They should be listed, in the least, as in the battle (since the last escape pod to be jettisoned was Carth and Revan's) and possibly listed in the infobox.
  • Created articles about these soldiers (Unidentified Republic soldier (Undercity), Unidentified Republic soldiers (Kolto tanks)). Added them to the infobox, history, and a quick reference in the intro. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 15:07, October 4, 2010 (UTC)
    • Sorry to butt in here, but I'm not sure that the article about the injured soldiers is needed. They aren't really notable except that they existed. I would like to hear Fiolli's opinion on this, though. Cylka^-talk- 15:21, October 4, 2010 (UTC)
      • I see what you mean about Notability, but are they really any less notable than, say, Unidentified Rebel commando (dark skin) or Unidentified Imperial admiral (Tarkin)? The rules on notability aren't clear about these side characters. At least the three Republic soldiers are either directly spoken to or directly referenced. The two I cited here are background at best. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 12:39, October 5, 2010 (UTC)
        • Since the articles are made, I have no objection over that for the sake of completeness. My objection, however, had nothing to do with whether or not there were articles for them; I wanted to see them mentioned in the infobox and prose. — Fiolli 22:45, October 17, 2010 (UTC)
          • They are in there now though (even before the last reply.) Republic soldiers (in general) are in the intro, those specific soldiers are in the infobox as well as the "Attack on the Endar Spire" section, plus the Legacy section. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 13:29, October 18, 2010 (UTC)
• Could the quote be found of Carth where the Endar Spire is mentioned? This would make a nice addition.
  • Made a request at the KOTOR WookieeProject for it. Hopefully someone will find it. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 15:07, October 4, 2010 (UTC)
    • Got the quote, and it's in there now. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 12:36, October 5, 2010 (UTC)
• Normally I do not quibble with paragraph size, but a two sentence paragraph at the beginning of the introduction is not acceptable. Please re-parse the layout of it.
  • Try it now?
• I'll be back to dive in later. — Fiolli 13:58, September 24, 2010 (UTC)
  • With the citations fixed and Soresu's objections at least in the works, I'll dive into this and we'll clean it up. — Fiolli 22:45, October 17, 2010 (UTC)
    • I still need to address Soresu's, but will work on that over lunch. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 13:29, October 18, 2010 (UTC)

Soresu

• Could you give some sort of specific date in the Bio?
• came under attack by the Sith, under the command of their leader Darth Malak. Malak's forces, led by Darth Bandon, boarded the ship This is a little confusing. Malak leads the attack, but Bandon leads Malak's forces? Could it say something like "A portion of Malak's forces?"
  • I made it to be "Part of Malak's forces..." now. –Tm_T ^(Talk) 08:05, November 2, 2010 (UTC)
• The ship also contained at least one droid It contains more than one. If I recall, there are a number of disabled utility droids that you come across.
• At least one other detail about the ship was that entrance to Trask's and Revan's quarters required a passcode.
• but due to rotating shifts, it was rare for roommates to see each other. I don't recall this being in the game. Could you check?
  • If I may butt in, "I'm your bunkmate here on the Endar Spire. We work opposite shifts, I guess that's why you haven't seen me before." which is Trask Ulgo's bio quote too. This ofcourse doesn't mean the all crew worked like this? --Tm_T ^(Talk) 09:15, October 22, 2010 (UTC)
• , who had recently lost the memories of his life as a Jedi Knight and Sith Lord, Is this necessary to specifications and layout? Couldn't he just be grouped with Trask as an Ensign? He's already quite adequately described in the Biography, where the info is actually relevant.
  • I would get rid of this too, Taral? –Tm_T ^(Talk) 08:05, November 2, 2010 (UTC)
• The Sith flagship, Leviathan, was placed above the planet Taris in order to pull the Endar Spire out of hyperspace and board it. Could you specify how it gets pulled out from hyperspace? It can't be assumed that the reader knows that the Leviathan has interdictor capabilities.
• While the Jedi engaged the Dark Jedi Which Jedi and Dark Jedi? When you use "the", you must be referring to someone you recently mentioned. Abscence of mention leads the reader to assume that you must be using Jedi/Dark Jedi as a plural, which is wrong.
  • They were single, so "a" placed now. –Tm_T ^(Talk) 08:05, November 2, 2010 (UTC)
• made her way to the starboard escape pods If the pods are on the starboard, why isn't this in the layout?
• To be very picky, RPGs don't have "levels". SoresuMakashi^{(Everything I tell you is the truth)} 04:40, October 8, 2010 (UTC)

QGJ

• The only crew to survive the Endar Spire's destruction were Shan, Revan, Onasi, and three Republic soldiers, This is misleading. According to the Rakghoul bitten survivor, there were others with him in the escape pod. Granted, they were killed by rakghouls after the pod landed, but they did survive the Endar Spire's destruction. QuiGonJinn ^(Talk) 12:01, October 23, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

• I'm giving some help on this article with permission as Taral is a bit absent. (: –Tm_T ^(Talk) 08:05, November 2, 2010 (UTC)

Vote to remove nomination (Inq only)

1. Unaddressed objections for nearly a month. Nominator is somewhat active but hasn't touched the nomination for a while. CC7567 ^(talk) 02:19, November 22, 2010 (UTC)

• Feel free to remove the nomination for now. I've been too busy to devote time to this (lately I've been more of a random browser-and-fixer and forum viewer). Thanks for the help though! Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith ^{-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-} 17:01, November 22, 2010 (UTC)