- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a comprehensive article nomination that was unsuccessful. Please do not modify it.
Mazara
- Nominated by: Holocron
(Complain) 04:04, November 14, 2010 (UTC) - Nomination comments: A minor character. She was only in the book for a few pages anyway.
(0 ECs/3 Users/3 Total)
Support
- Yeah! Menkooroo 13:43, November 23, 2010 (UTC)
- OLIOSTER (talk) 19:36, November 29, 2010 (UTC)
- Darth Morrt 15:59, December 15, 2010 (UTC)
Object
Hey there! Is there any more info from the book you can give about the character? Her
entry in the CUSWE on www.cuswe.org (backup link not verified!) mentions an article she wrote that got her fired from her job, and the fact that she staged small rallies.- Fixed. Holocron
(Complain) 21:40, November 14, 2010 (UTC)
- Good show. Can you fix up the second sentence, though? Right now it looks like Blackwater Systems was breaking Falleen's laws against the wishes of Mazara's superiors.
- Fixed. Serves me right for trying to fix an article at 7 am. Holocron
(Complain) 06:51, November 15, 2010 (UTC)
- Fixed. Serves me right for trying to fix an article at 7 am. Holocron
- Good show. Can you fix up the second sentence, though? Right now it looks like Blackwater Systems was breaking Falleen's laws against the wishes of Mazara's superiors.
- Fixed. Holocron
Can you give any more info on when Obi and Ani hooked up with her? Where was it, what was she doing?- Fixed. Funny how you forget these things until someone else points them out. Holocron
(Complain) 21:40, November 14, 2010 (UTC)
- Fixed. Funny how you forget these things until someone else points them out. Holocron
Looking at her CUSWE entry, it seems like there's enough info for a personality and traits section.- Done. I have a message on the page you linked to for the CSWE. Thanks. Holocron
(Complain) 21:40, November 14, 2010 (UTC)
- Done. I have a message on the page you linked to for the CSWE. Thanks. Holocron
Do you know if she has an entry in The Complete Star Wars Encyclopedia? If you have no idea, you can ask here.Menkooroo 14:41, November 14, 2010 (UTC)- Good work! Just make a note here when you get a response on the CSWE entry. Menkooroo 09:57, November 15, 2010 (UTC)
- Looks like you got a response. The CSWE (and probably the Jedi Apprentice book too?) indicate that she protested the working and living conditions that resulted from overdevelopment in Falleen's capital city. This should be in the article, either in the bio or in p & t, wherever you think it would fit best. Also --- does she live in the capital city? The article just says right now that she lives on Falleen. Menkooroo 08:41, November 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Added the new information to the article. The book didn't directly mention that she was protesting against the treatment of workers, so it did help. Holocron
(Complain) 11:43, November 23, 2010 (UTC)
- There are better ways to source than just sticking every reference at the end of the paragraph --- that is to say, the article should indicate precisely what information comes from where. Something like: "Mazara then became the leader of a rebel group of Falleen attempting to stop large corporations from polluting their homeworld[1] and protest the terrible conditions that workers endured due to the overdevelopment of the city.[2] She was targeted for assassination by Blackwater Systems for leading protests against their business practices.[1]" Make sense? Also, never put a space between references (so, [1][2] rather than [1] [2]).
- If all of the information in the second paragraph is in the book, then the extra reference ([2]) at the end of the paragraph isn't necessary.
- "Personality and traits" has two [1]'s in a row.
- Fixed. Holocron
(Complain) 13:34, November 23, 2010 (UTC)
- I jettisoned the [2] from the second paragraph entirely, as all that info was there, from the book itself, before you got the CSWE entry. Menkooroo 13:43, November 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Fixed. Holocron
- Added the new information to the article. The book didn't directly mention that she was protesting against the treatment of workers, so it did help. Holocron
- Looks like you got a response. The CSWE (and probably the Jedi Apprentice book too?) indicate that she protested the working and living conditions that resulted from overdevelopment in Falleen's capital city. This should be in the article, either in the bio or in p & t, wherever you think it would fit best. Also --- does she live in the capital city? The article just says right now that she lives on Falleen. Menkooroo 08:41, November 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Good work! Just make a note here when you get a response on the CSWE entry. Menkooroo 09:57, November 15, 2010 (UTC)
One more, actually. Does she have any other lines that would make an appropriate quote for the personality and traits section?Menkooroo 10:01, November 15, 2010 (UTC)- Done. Holocron
(Complain) 21:55, November 15, 2010 (UTC)
- Done. Holocron
A new one: An article should be created for Falleen's capital city. Does the book give it a name? If not, Falleen's capital city or something would be OK. Just remember to stick Template:Conjecture at the top of the article.Menkooroo 12:21, November 23, 2010 (UTC)- Done. Holocron
(Complain) 13:34, November 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Done. Holocron
- It now has a redlink to fill. --Eyrezer 09:22, December 8, 2010 (UTC)
- What do you suggest it should be linked to? The only details given on her employers were that they fired her for writing articles they didn't agree with. Holocron
(Complain) 14:01, December 15, 2010 (UTC)
- What do you suggest it should be linked to? The only details given on her employers were that they fired her for writing articles they didn't agree with. Holocron
I haven't read this book, but maybe the assassination attempt can also have its own article. What do you think? Darth Morrt 08:53, December 12, 2010 (UTC)- Given its insignificance, I don't think so. There would barely be enough for two or three sentences.If you give that an article you would have to start giving other tiny events articles. Holocron
(Complain) 14:01, December 15, 2010 (UTC)
- Given its insignificance, I don't think so. There would barely be enough for two or three sentences.If you give that an article you would have to start giving other tiny events articles. Holocron
- Cav:
- Articles are needed for the rebel group, and the assassination attempt.
- Done. Holocron
(Complain) 14:04, January 16, 2011 (UTC)
- Done. Holocron
- The editor redlink needs to be filled.
- With what?
- More context on Kenobi and Skywalker's involvement on Falleen is needed. Why were they hunting Omega? What was the link between Omega and Blackwater? - Cavalier One
(Squadron channel) 17:47, January 4, 2011 (UTC)
- Done.
- Articles are needed for the rebel group, and the assassination attempt.
- Jinzler
- The article is longer that 250 words, so, per CAN rule 13, is ineligible to become a Comprehensive Article. However, I'm sure that it would make a great Good Article, should you chose to nominate it on the GAN page. --Jinzler 13:36, January 16, 2011 (UTC)
- Shame, still I suppose I'll nominate it there. Most of the problems should have been fixed by now. Anyone mind taking the nomination down? Not sure about the procedure for archiving articles. Holocron
(Complain) 14:04, January 16, 2011 (UTC)
- Shame, still I suppose I'll nominate it there. Most of the problems should have been fixed by now. Anyone mind taking the nomination down? Not sure about the procedure for archiving articles. Holocron
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