Wookieepedia:Comprehensive article nominations/Holowan Laboratories/Canon

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The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a comprehensive article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Holowan Laboratories/Canon

(4 ECs/2 Users/6 Total)

Support

  1. Brandon Rhea(talk) 01:46, December 16, 2014 (UTC)
  2. ECvote Corellian PremierJedi symbolThe Force will be with you always 02:54, December 19, 2014 (UTC)
  3. ECvote Ayrehead02 (talk) 12:10, December 20, 2014 (UTC)
  4. ECvote 501st dogma(talk) 18:14, December 21, 2014 (UTC)
  5. JorrelWiki-shrinkableFraajic 04:17, January 11, 2015 (UTC)
  6. Inqvote Supreme Emperor (talk) 02:46, January 12, 2015 (UTC)

Object

Brandon

  • The "Behind the scenes" section is currently unsourced in its entirety. Please be sure to source it. - Brandon Rhea(talk) 05:36, December 12, 2014 (UTC)
    • Fixed. - AV-6R7User talk:AV-6R7 05:41, December 12, 2014 (UTC)
      • Not quite yet. The first sentence is still unsourced. Additionally, I'm not sure of the relevance of the second sentence. You definitely need a reference to the fact that this was in Legends, so that's good, but I'm not sure why talking about the planet would be needed. A better bit of information would be to say that Holowan Laboratories was first introduced in Legends, say which Legends story it was first introduced in, provide a source for its first appearance in Legends (which is the same source you already have, so that's good), and then say which canon source it was re-canonized in (that being the Rebels Visual Guide). - Brandon Rhea(talk) 17:57, December 15, 2014 (UTC)
A Force user

Hey AV-6R7, welcome to the CAN page. I noticed a couple things which need corrected, so here goes:

  • It is essential that the article have an infobox. The "Company" one would do just fine.
  • Please refer to CAN rule #7.
  • I would add the fact that it was active during the Clone Wars to the first sentence. This helps the chronology flow better.
  • Also, in the BTS section, please add context for head to head and add release dates for the sources.
  • Good luck in fixing these. Corellian PremierJedi symbolThe Force will be with you always 22:12, December 18, 2014 (UTC)
    • Fixed. Removed image because it interrupted page flow. - AV-6R7User talk:AV-6R7 22:38, December 18, 2014 (UTC)
Ayrehead
501st
  • As you say that they circumnavigated the ban by reclassifying their products as security droids, it should be mentioned earlier that they produced battle droids. 501st dogma(talk) 17:40, December 21, 2014 (UTC)
SE
  • Context on the Clone Wars?
  • Can you clarify what the ban was on? Was it on the manufacture of battle droids or just battle droids in general.
  • Can you include a release date for Head to Head in the BTS as well as who the author was? Supreme Emperor (talk) 15:55, December 28, 2014 (UTC)
    • The book was vague on the specifics, but I assume it was on the production of battle droids. Are these changes to your liking? - AV-6R7User talk:AV-6R7 06:31, December 30, 2014 (UTC)
      • You forgot context on the Clone Wars.
  • Do they design the droids as well? Supreme Emperor (talk) 03:27, January 9, 2015 (UTC)
    • According the the Rebels: VG they designed their products. - AV-6R7User talk:AV-6R7 03:33, January 9, 2015 (UTC)
      • Please include this in the infobox. You should probably also mention it at the beginning of the first sentence. Maybe something like "Holowan Laboratories was a company that designed and manufactured" Supreme Emperor (talk) 04:55, January 10, 2015 (UTC)
Jorrel Fraajic
  • Repeating objection on the context of the Clone Wars. 2 suggestions on placement:
    1. "...during the Clone Wars that..." ➡ "...during the Clone Wars, a galaxy-wide conflict fought between the Galactic Republic and Confederacy of Independent Systems forces, that"
    2. "Following the conflict's resolution, ..." ➡ "Following the resolution of the conflict, fought between the Galactic Republic's clone armies and the Separatist factions' droid armies, ..."
    In either case, I think a link to the galaxy would be warranted to explain the significance of the Clone Wars. In option 2, you could put "the galaxy-spanning Clone Wars" or something to that extent in the sentence before.
  • Speaking of the CIS, you should probably make a mention that the main users of Holowan droids were Seperatist and gangster factions. Probably between sentences 1 and 2. JorrelWiki-shrinkableFraajic 03:59, January 11, 2015 (UTC)

Comments

  • Not here to vote but the second sentence of the BTS has a typo. Also, the sentence is kinda knarly to start with. Might want to rephrase. Fe Nite (talk) 14:23, December 12, 2014 (UTC)