Wookieepedia:Comprehensive article nominations/Galduran Calrissian's smuggling ring

The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a comprehensive article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Galduran Calrissian's smuggling ring

• Nominated by: Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 22:45, July 26, 2011 (UTC)
• Nomination comments: Just a kotor nom to tide me over until the barn burner.

(2 ECs/1 Users/3 Total)

Support

1. Aside from a small detail, you did a good job EJ. Cal Jedi ^{(Personal Comm Channel)} 01:38, July 27, 2011 (UTC)
2. ~Savage 19:19, July 31, 2011 (UTC)
3. Menkooroo 18:03, August 5, 2011 (UTC)

Object

1. Bob
   • Is there any reason to believe the smuggling ring predated or outlived Calrissian? If not, I'd combine the first two sentences into something like, "A male smuggler named Garduran Calrissian led a smuggling ring in Hutt Space..."
     • Changed.--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 15:44, July 31, 2011 (UTC)
   • I think maybe you have too much context on the Hutts. It should be enough to say they are the indigenous species who controlled the area, not mention that they were sentient or gastropods, say.
     • You're right, I removed the extra context.--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 15:44, July 31, 2011 (UTC)
   • Can you add a reference to the end of the first paragraph? It sort of hangs there right now with no ref. ~Savage 14:16, July 31, 2011 (UTC)
     • Oops, fixed.--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 15:44, July 31, 2011 (UTC)
2. I'm not sure if the line about sharing a last name with Lando is necessary. In Galduran's article, sure, but in the article about his smuggling ring, it's kind of a tangent. It also interrupts the flow of the bts, which is otherwise completely about his belt. Menkooroo 17:57, August 5, 2011 (UTC)
   • Removed the Lando sentence.--Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 18:02, August 5, 2011 (UTC)

Comments