Wookieepedia:Comprehensive article nominations/B'ree

< Wookieepedia:Comprehensive article nominations
The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Comprehensive article nomination that was withdrawn. Please do not modify it.

B'ree

  • Nominated by: Jedi Order ImpacticForce (Talk) 20:27, 18 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:My second Rodian in one day.
  • WookieeProject (optional):WP:KOTOR

(0 ECs/1 Users/1 Total)

(Votes required: 2 EC vote(s) required to reach minimum. Additional 2 user or 1 EC vote required to pass.)

Support

  1. Dentface (talk) 01:09, 21 August 2021 (UTC)

Object

Dent
  • Quote attribution shouldn't have a period unless it is a complete sentence. "B'ree to Revan" is not a complete sentence.
  • Your first sentence on the page needs its own citation. As it stands now, it's written as if citation 2 for the date is also covering the whole first sentence. At the end of "Korriban during the Jedi Civil War," add a KOTOR citation.
  • It's technically incorrect to say "Released by BioWare." They are the developers and LucasArts was the publisher. I'd reword so you don't say "released."
  • In the sentence referencing Uthar Wynn, I'd say "Sith Master" instead of just "Master" so you have full context of who the person is.
  • Please take note of my copy edit. Dentface (talk) 20:16, 19 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Addressed all. Sorry about those formatting errors, I should've caught that. Jedi Order ImpacticForce (Talk) 23:01, 20 August 2021 (UTC)
      • No worries! Happens to all of us. :) Dentface (talk) 01:09, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
Luca
  • Gender should go after species.
  • Does Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic identify Korriban as an "Outer Rim Sith planet"?
  • Context for the Jedi Civil War?
  • Context for Cassus Fett?
  • I'd reword the sentence "During his search for the Star Maps, redeemed Sith Lord Revan arrived on Korriban" to "The redeemed Sith LordRevan arrived on Korriban during his search for the Star Maps."
  • A date for the event described by the sentence above?
  • The "assumption" paragraph is confusing, maybe a "soon later" between the second and the third sentence? LucaRoR (Talk) 07:22, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Fixed all. The game mentions it being a Sith world. Not sure if it mentions the Outer Rim, so I referenced it to be safe.Jedi Order ImpacticForce (Talk) 14:35, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
      • You say "that year", meaning 3956 BBY, however the Search for the Star Maps's article indicates that it occurred in 3950. LucaRoR (Talk) 15:02, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
        • That is 100% my bad. I accidentally linked the wrong search. I meant the one that occurs during the game, not before. The in-game search takes place in 3956. Sorry about that! Jedi Order ImpacticForce (Talk) 16:22, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Quote shouldn't be linked.
  • A touch of context for Dreshdae? I'm not sure about this myself.
  • Did B'ree know who Revan was? Worth mentioning, in my opinion. LucaRoR (Talk) 16:44, 21 August 2021 (UTC)

Comments