- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a comprehensive article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Attack on the Vandyne system
- Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 13:38, October 6, 2013 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: Hmm feels like time I made a few more CAnoms
(4 ECs/0 Users/4 Total)
Support
501st dogma(talk) 00:43, October 8, 2013 (UTC)
Exiled Jedi (Greetings) 18:29, October 26, 2013 (UTC)
Supreme Emperor (talk) 05:07, October 29, 2013 (UTC)
Corellian PremierThe Force will be with you always 23:49, November 21, 2013 (UTC)
Object
- 501st
Technically, the Vong Empire did not exist until 27 ABY, so they did not actually invade the galaxy in 25. The species itself was the thing that invaded, and they formed the Empire after the fall of Coruscant I believe.- Ah ok changed. Ayrehead02 (talk) 21:44, October 6, 2013 (UTC)
Do not use Vong to refer to the invaders. Instead, use the full name Yuuzhan Vong.- Ok fixed. Ayrehead02 (talk) 21:44, October 6, 2013 (UTC)
"The book gives no information on the outcome of the attack, but a separate map shows the Vandyne system was under Vong control by 26 ABY." In this case, it probably can be assumed that the attack was victorious.- Ok there are some CAs at the moment in a very similar style to this from the last burner in which victory wasn't assumed in the same circumstance. I can change it so that this and all the others make that assumption if you'd like or should I maintain the standard used in the older articles? Ayrehead02 (talk) 21:44, October 6, 2013 (UTC)
- If these objections are also relevant in your other two noms, fix them as well. 501st dogma(talk) 18:07, October 6, 2013 (UTC)
- Done. Ayrehead02 (talk) 21:44, October 6, 2013 (UTC)
- SE
Can you reword the first line a bit? I was thinking something like "During the intergalactic Yuuzhan Vong's invasion of the galaxy between 25 and 29 ABY, they attacked the Vandyne system." Or something like that. What do you think?Supreme Emperor (talk) 03:38, October 13, 2013 (UTC)- Reworded as per your suggestion. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:20, October 25, 2013 (UTC)
- Exiled Jedi
I noticed you used the word "attack" a lot in the body. Could you vary up the word choice a bit?--Exiled Jedi(Greetings) 16:04, October 15, 2013 (UTC)
- Changed out two of them. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:20, October 25, 2013 (UTC)
- A Force user
Please find a way to adjust the wording so it doesn't indicate that the battle took place over an entire year.- Changed. Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:46, November 2, 2013 (UTC)
Also, it could use some context on hyperlanes.Corellian PremierThe Force will be with you always 02:28, November 1, 2013 (UTC)
- Context as in what a hyperlane is or where those lanes go? Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:46, November 2, 2013 (UTC)
- Sorry, I mean where the lanes go. Corellian Premier
The Force will be with you always 02:47, November 11, 2013 (UTC)
- Added some context. Ayrehead02 (talk) 15:09, November 14, 2013 (UTC)
- Sorry, I mean where the lanes go. Corellian Premier
- Context as in what a hyperlane is or where those lanes go? Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:46, November 2, 2013 (UTC)
Comments