Talk: Master Jonathan/Archive3

< User talk:Master Jonathan

This is an archive of my talk page. To leave me a message, please use my current talk page. Thank you.

Copyedit request

Hey Jonathan, I just wanted to ask you if you could copyedit this article. It's very short and not really exciting, so if you could do this within the next days, this would be great. Pranay Sobusk ~ Talk 21:11, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

  • "Short" is right—it took me all of five minutes to read through it three times. :P It should be ready to go at 441 words, according to Microsoft Word. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 21:23, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

Rahn

Hi, Jon. Could you please copyedit Qu Rahn? When you have time, of course. QuiGonJinn 20px(Talk) 19:02, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

Bant Eerin

Hey Jonathan, you obviously have a pretty strong knowledge of the Jedi Apprentice/ Jedi Quest books, so I had a question for you. In what book was it stated that Kit Fisto planned on remaining apprentice-less after his training of Bant? This was on both Bant's page and Nahdar Vebb's original page, however I've been unable to find what book it comes from. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks. Darth Trayus 30px (Trayus Academy) 06:33, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

  • That's interesting. I don't recall that from any of the books, but I don't own any of the books—I borrow them from the library, and I don't have any of the Jedi Quest books out right now. It could be in one of them, though, as I have far better knowledge of Jedi Apprentice than I do of Quest. As I said, I can't check right now, though (sorry). On a side note, the CSWE claims in Kit Fisto's entry that Kit trained Nahdar first, then Bant, which is clearly impossible to reconcile with the young readers books and the dialogue in "Lair of Grievous", so {{Twoconflicting}} is probably in order here. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 07:12, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

Copyedit

Hello again. I have another article that needs your copyediting services. Thanks in advance )) QuiGonJinn 20px(Talk) 18:16, 10 July 2009 (UTC)

Lightsaber Duels

Hey Jon, it's time for me to ask you again for a favor from your Star Wars collection. In the video game Lightsaber Duels, does Rex appear anywhere that is not otherwise featured in the TCW series, and if so, do the scenes appear to be canonical? Thanks in advance. CC7567 (talk) 06:48, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

Insider

Here's a non-copyediting request from me for a change:P I've noticed that you have Insider #91 in your collection, so I would like to ask you to check what the Refresher Reading: 20 Things You Don't Know About the Mos Eisley Cantina article has to say about Sariss, except from what is already noted in the article. And if it doesn't bother you very much, could you also check her CSWE entry for any new information? QuiGonJinn 20px(Talk) 20:19, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

  • Insider: No new info.
  • CSWE: "She […] was often part of the Secret Order entourage sent to the Super Star Destroyer Vengeance to confer with the Dark Jedi Jerec." This is before the Battle of Endor; I can't give any more specific timing than that. As usual, let me know if you need anything else. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 20:40, 11 July 2009 (UTC)
    • Hmm, the line from the CSWE appears to be taken directly from The Dark Forces Saga, so there's no new information at all. Great, thanks for your help, again. QuiGonJinn 20px(Talk) 10:35, 12 July 2009 (UTC)

Re: Jedi Apprentice

Hey, I just now noticed your message on my talk page in regards to The Followers. I somehow missed it before now. From the FAN page, it looks like you got it taken care of, but let me know if you still need something. —Xwing328(Talk) 03:40, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

  • It's taken care of. I only left that message because I didn't know how long it would take to get it from the library; as it turns out, it came in the next day. Thanks anyway. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 03:42, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

????

Hello, this is Apatrosminer. Why do you keep changing my edit's on Sam Heggs?

--Apatrosminer 22:11, 23 July 2009 (UTC)

  • Mainly because your edits have way too much flowery language—they read like a novel and not an encyclopedic entry. No offense, but while it may be appropriate to include that information in the article, the writing was so poor that it would simply be easier to rewrite it from scratch rather than trying to clean up what you put there, hence why I reverted it. Also note that while I reverted the last one, Grand Moff Tranner actually reverted the first edit. I suggest you look at our Manual of Style for a basic idea of what is expected; also, you might want to look through some Good Articles to get a feel for the general style and tone expected on Wookieepedia. Thank you and may the Force be with you! —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 02:54, 24 July 2009 (UTC)

Insider 110

Hey MJ. Since you have Insider 110, could you tell me if there's any new information on the Senate hostage crisis in the "Ask Lobot" feature on page 59? Kasra has informed me that there's related info. Thanks. CC7567 (talk) 02:21, 28 July 2009 (UTC)

  • Basically, a reader pointed out an irreconcilable error at the end of the episode. According the the script, all of the action takes place in the smaller, domed, Republic Executive Building, yet when Cad's bombs go off, smoke is seen from the larger, mushroom-shaped Senate Building. Leland Chee says, "The error was spotted early on [in production], but the changes weren't incorporated, and by the time the error was noticed again, it became too late to fix. Should we ever do a Special Edition to correct some of the mistakes of the series, this would be on the list of fixes." There you go, though it's probably more relevant to the episode article rather than the event article. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 06:40, 28 July 2009 (UTC)
    • Okay, thanks very much. CC7567 (talk) 18:13, 28 July 2009 (UTC)

Copyedit

Hey Jon. Could you give Tauht a copyedit? Thanks. QuiGonJinn 20px(Talk) 08:33, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

Insider

Could you check if Denal is mentioned in Star Wars: The Clone Wars Season One Episode Guide, Part One article from Star Wars Insider 106, and if there is any new information. Thanks. QuiGonJinn 20px(Talk) 19:17, 2 August 2009 (UTC)

Insider 85

Hey Jon, I noticed that you own Insider 85, and was wondering if you could check something for me: is there any new or unique information on Fang Zar in the Who's Who in the Delegation of 2000 section? Thank you so much. Darth Trayus 30px (Trayus Academy) 19:10, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

Since there appears to be a good bit of information from Insider not already in the article, I'll just quote the whole entry here:

(removed)

Please let me know when you're done with that information so I can remove it—it's borderline fair use already, and I'll have no claim of fair use if it's up longer than it needs to be. As far as CSWE, it has no new info except for this statement: "When Duro fell to the Separatists, Zar was among the first to support Corellia's decision to retreat and defend its own borders, largely due to his friendship with Corellia's Senator Garm Bell Iblis." —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 22:57, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

Delete

I couldn't find a way to do it myself, so can you delete this account for me? I won't be using it ever again, and I'm just changing it' pass to something random and deleting it's E-mail so I can't log on. --Darth Callidous 04:10, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Iridonian

Hi Jonathan. You objection to Iridonian should be fixed now. --Eyrezer 05:39, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

Request

Hey Jonathan,

Can you look over this when you have a chance? I have other things going on currently, so there isn't any rush by any means. Thanks in advance.—Tommy9281 17px (Talk) 22:43, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Thanks

Thank you for re-adding those audio files to the Jerec page. I have no idea why Havac removed them. The only thing that changed was the one quote altered slightly from "Who's that guy in black anyway?" to "Hey, who was that guy in black anyway?". But anyway, thanks for that. - JMAS Hey, it's me! 00:26, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

Imprint

GA-Icon
"So—are you still worried about being sent to the Agricultural Corps?"
Imprint has been approved by the AgriCorps and awarded Good status. Feel free to add the {{User GA}} template to your userpage to acknowledge your hard work. The AgriCorps thanks you for your efforts, and looks forward to future nominations from you! — Grunny (Talk) 05:35, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

Nist

Hey Jonathan. When you have time, can you copyedit Xecr Nist? Thanks. QuiGonJinn 20px(Talk) 14:51, 14 August 2009 (UTC)

  • Done. Two things to check: On a few occasions, you say that "John Doe ordered to" whatever. This is incorrect, as "ordered" in that sense requires an object immediately following, and you are following it with another verb. Also, you might want to check for overuse of "however" and replace or remove a few instances of it. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 01:14, 16 August 2009 (UTC)

Karath

Hey, Jon. Could you copy-edit the Saul Karath article for me? I would also appreciate a list of objections, when you have the time.--Jedi Kasra (talk) 20:23, 14 August 2009 (UTC)

Copyedit done. As far as objections, I generally focus my reviews on GA noms and not FA noms, but here's a few things I picked up on while reading through the article:

  • Context needed on the Jebble-Vanquo-Tarnith line in both intro and body.
  • "After Karath, Morvis, and Onasi reached Coruscant, he filed his resignation to the Admiral of the Fleet": "He" could refer to any of them; please clarify.
  • "Haazen used a remote located on his cybernetics to fire at the skybridge near the Draay Estate, killing Master Xamar, who turned against the Covenant and many Jedi Knights.": You say that Xamar was killed, then turned against the Covenant and Jedi. This doesn't make sense.
    • Taken care of.--Jedi Kasra (talk) 15:34, 17 August 2009 (UTC)
      • It still says that Xamar turned against the Covenant after being killed. If you mean to reveal that he had previously turned against them, the correct wording would be "...killing Master Xamar, who had turned against the Covenant,...". —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 19:23, 25 August 2009 (UTC)
  • Is there any information at all for a Legacy section?
    • I don't believe so, Darth Traya mentions to the Exile that the planet Telos would eventually forget the devastation that Karath brought to their surface, but that's pretty much it. I guess I could mention that good ol' Varko took his place.--Jedi Kasra (talk) 15:34, 17 August 2009 (UTC)
      • Alright, I put a Legacy section up, please take a look at it and tell me what you think.--Jedi Kasra (talk) 15:53, 25 August 2009 (UTC)

Let me know if you have any questions. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 02:29, 16 August 2009 (UTC)

  • Thanks for the review and the copy-edit, Jon. I'll get to the objections in a few minutes.--Jedi Kasra (talk) 14:49, 17 August 2009 (UTC)

Lady Joker

Hey Jon,

When you get a moment, can you run through Mighella please? Same terms as always ;), thanks.—Tommy9281 17px (Talk) 15:19, 16 August 2009 (UTC)

JA and JQ

I saw you work on some articles about JA and JQ. I'll do this too. Just that we don't both want the same article. --Clone Commander Lee Talk 17:40, 17 August 2009 (UTC)

And another one

Hey,

When you have time, check out the Funeral of Marka Ragnos please? Same terms as usual. Thanks in advance.—Tommy9281 17px (Talk) 03:40, 22 August 2009 (UTC)

Por favor

Hey,

Please check out Duel on Cophrigin V when you get a chance? Thanks.—Tommy9281 17px (Talk) 12:32, 26 August 2009 (UTC)

Seyugi Dervishes

I'm going to nom this for either an FA or GA, depending on the total words. Could you please give me a word count (my Word program says 1,105), a copy-edit, and objections to the article? Thanks.--Jedi Kasra (talk) 12:24, 27 August 2009 (UTC)

  • Copyedit done. I have only two objections:
    • Two sentences in the second History paragraph start with "However"; can you change one?
    • The BTS is a little on the short side compared to the rest of the article; you might want to give some context on the two sourcebooks, such as that they came from Wizards of the Coast.
      • Try it now.--Jedi Kasra (talk) 22:03, 27 August 2009 (UTC)
        • Looks good, but you're now only four words short of FA eligibility, and it would be sad to see it fall short by so few words. I would recommend adding a brief note to each sourcebook describing in what manner the Dervishes were mentioned in each one (i.e. in JATM they were presented as one of several Force organizations that characters could train with); this should easily push it over 1,000. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 22:13, 27 August 2009 (UTC)
          • I think I see what you mean, how about now?--Jedi Kasra (talk) 12:12, 28 August 2009 (UTC)
  • Currently, the article stands at only 981 words of actual prose, so it's not quite eligible for FA as it stands. The BTS objection above, if done without too much fluff, might be able to kick it over a thousand, though. Let me know if you have any further questions. —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 20:14, 27 August 2009 (UTC)
  • Thanks for reviewing it, man. I appreciate your help.--Jedi Kasra (talk) 22:03, 27 August 2009 (UTC)
  • Thanks for all your help, man. Nomed the article for the FA's.--Jedi Kasra (talk) 21:46, 28 August 2009 (UTC)

Sauvax copyedit

Thank you for copyediting my FAN Sauvax, Master Jonathan; that's very kind of you as I did not even had the chance to ask you. After Tommy recommended you, I checked but I saw you were more interested in GAN's, so I decided to wait a few days and try to separate time myself, disturbing you only later and only if really needed. Of course, your work is welcome :)--Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:27, 28 August 2009 (UTC)

  • Hey, no problem. As far as being "more interested in GANs", that applies to reviewing (which I need to get back into); I'm willing to copyedit anything. In the future, feel free to run anything that you need copyedited by this page. Keep up the good work and may the Force be with you! —Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 18:23, 28 August 2009 (UTC)